Najgore je kad koračaš usnulim ulicama
dalekog tuđeg grada
i kad slutiš dahtanje spavača
iza zidova utvrđenih šutnjom noći
Želiš ubrzati hod a noge otežale
jedva ih vučeš u strahu
da te ne zaskoči usud iznenađenja
želiš počinak duši a grudi ti se nadimlju
od pomisli da si i suviše zakasnio
pa ti ta tvoja sveprisutnost
u očaj raste
Jesi li u sebi to ti sâm
ili su drugi tamo iza neprobojnih zidova
obesmislili tvoj bitak pravedni
Požurio bi ali te svaki tvoj korak odâje
dok se kroz ovaj hladni mrak tek naziru
odbljesci mjeseca s oblutaka dalekih žâla.
(Vancouver, 23. 9. 1988.)
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TAKEN ABACK BY THE FOREIGNNESS
It’s worse when you stride the sleeping streets
of a distant foreign town
and when you can sense the panting
of the sleepers behind walls fortified
with the silence of the night
You want to speed up your walk
and yet your feet are heavy
you can hardly drag them in your fear
that the fate of surprise catch you out
rest you want, for your soul, yet your chest swells up
from the idea you are much too late
and this omnipresence
of yours grows into despair
Is that you yourself in you
or have the others there behind impenetrable walls
made nonsense of your righteous being
You would hasten but every step betrays you,
while just discernible
in this cold darkness gleams
the moon on the cobbles of distant beaches.
(Vancouver, September 23, 1988.)
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