Just A Drop In The Sea

To you, it may be a rose, but to me, it's my heart.

I will try, Onee-sama. Life without you - the only warmth, the only smile, the only love in this world - may not be worth it. May be full of everything gray, black, dirty, unfeeling. But I guess, I suppose, that I must try to live on. Try to advance, as much as I can, because of the fact itself that I am alive. I must, they tell me, I must. I do not see the point, though, because I see no life, no beauty beyond your death.
But I shall try, Onee-sama. I'll try to live alone in the gray gardens of nowhere, to watch the beauty of white sky, of peaceful snow, try to drink up the sun as it smiles to me, reflecting from the sea. Those were my dreams before. I shall try to revive them, to create new ones in my new world of solitude.

How hard it is, Onee-sama. How hard it is to leave you. How hard it is to leave everything you were to me. Every word you said, every thing you wrote, every thing you did. They all remind me of you, of my love for you. It is so hard that it is barely possible for me to stay on my feet from all the weight on my heart. I wish I could die with you. But someone mentions I shouldn't. So I stay alive.

Nee, Onee-sama. What do you think? Is it worth it to live a life with no feelings, with superficial outlook on the beauty of the world, of no feeling of love in the heart; isn't it really a waste of life? Or is it worth it to live a life of pain, of everyday reminders of the only most precious thing that vanished, of feeling of love so great, but the feeling of pain even greater.

But I must try. I believe I have lost almost all hope in any kind of love equal to mine coming my way, of any kind of true happiness, but I suppose I must go on. Try to leave behind, bury those memories so fierce in my heart, to move on with eyes empty of love and shallow in life. For I cannot go on like this any longer. Dying inside, but not dying; grieving heavily, missing heavily, but not being able to cry, to mourn you.

Because there is no mourning you. Ever.

So I'm leaving, Onee-sama. Trying to liven myself. Trying to find life, a little piece of it. I will not know what to do, where to go, so pray for me, my dearest. Guard me...Help me find beauty.

I love you. I LOVE YOU:

I miss you. Miss you, miss you, miss you.
Help me, Nee-chan. I wish you helped me.

I must leave now. Help me find beauty, make me beautiful in this life.
I shall cry for you.

Goodbye, my love. I...
love
you

12.11.2008. u 16:56
° 1 thoughts of the world ° Print ° # °

design: moi

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coments no/si?

Opis bloga

Mjesto gdje moja malenkost namjerava upisivati što je pukne i kad je pukne i na kojem jeziku je pukne. ;)

~O meni~

Dreams, thoghts, hopes and the spirit of a girl once called Hime-sama... Who wants to be one... Who aspires for her life and being to express elegance and art...

Volim ili obožavam (ili obožavam ili volim):

- more

- anime

- pjevati

- eleganciju

- crtati

- glazbu

- prirodu

- plesati

- svoju obitelj

- pisati

- čitati

- pristojnost

- mjuzikle

- dobre filmove i predstave

- biti na pozornici

- lijepu odjeću

- lijepu šminku

- Japan

- japanski

- francuski

- grčki

- latinski

- prevoditi

- e-mail

- istinu

- snove
.
.
.


Snovi (stvarni ili nestvarni):

- postati seiyuu

- pjevati kao Amy Lee

- znati japanski skoro kao materinji

- dobro znati francuski

- dug vijek i puno komentara ovog bloga xD

- nepresušan izvor dobrih pjesama

- usavršiti crtanje i bojanje u kompjuterskim programima

- duga jaka lijepa kosa (XD)

- imati klavir za vježbanje

- znati ga svirati xD

- biti sretna
.
.
.



ANIME:


SHOUJO KAKUMEI UTENA!!!

Air

Basilisk

Fruits basket

Sailor Moon

Kimi Ga Nozomu Eien

Super Gals (dijelom)

Koi Kaze

Aa Megami Sama

Reservoir Chronicle Tsubasa (dijelom)

Pokemon (da xDD)

Digimon (još veći da xDDD)

Digimon Tamers (što reći?)

Candy Candy

Dragon Ball (dijelom... xDDD)

Nadam se da će ova lista narasti veelika... :D


MANGA

Mei-chan No Shitsuji

Princess Ai

Tokyo Mew Mew (arigatou, Onee-chan and Dunja-hime!)

Tsubasa Chronicle (dijelom)

Namida Nochi Happi- Endo (Happy End After the Tears)

Shuffle (dijelom)
___________________________________

MUZIKA

All time favorites:

~*~

Ogata Megumi-sama

Evanescence

Anime OP&ED

Jean Michel Jarre

The Phantom of the Opera

~*~

Lijep stil i/ili slušam ponekad:

Velvet Underground

Johnny Cash

Nick Cave

Darko Rundek

Vaya Con Dios

Sinead O'Connor

Om

Pink Floyd

I sve što mi zapne za uho...
___________________________________

I *ahem* to je to :D

MSN: eternal_starlight@mail.inet.hr

___________________________________

C'est le malaise du moment
L'épidémie qui s'étend
La fęte est finie on descend
Les pensées qui glacent la raison
Paupičres baissées, visage gris
Surgissent les fantomes de notre lit
On ouvre le loquet de la grille
Du taudit qu'on appelle maison

Protect me from what I want
Protect me from what I want
Protect me from what I want
Protect me
Protect me

Protčge-moi, protčge-moi

Sommes nous les jouets du destin
Souviens toi des moments divins
Planants, éclatés au matin
Et maintenant nous sommes tout seuls
Perdus les reves de s'aimer
Les temps oů on avait rien fait
Il nous reste toute une vie pour pleurer
Et maintenant nous sommes tout seuls

Protect me from what I want
Protect me from what I want
Protect me from what I want
Protect me
Protect me
___________________________________



___________________________________

“There are only two tragedies in life: one is not getting what one wants, and the other is getting it.”
Oscar Wilde





“Illusion is the first of all pleasures.”
Oscar Wilde
___________________________________

I am stretched on your grave and will lie there forever
If your hands were in mine I'd be sure we'd not sever
My apple tree my brightness, it's time we were together
For I smell of the earth and I'm worn by the weather


When my family thinks that I'm safe in my bed
From night until morning I am stretched at your head
Calling out to the earth with tears hot and wild
My grief for the girl that I loved as a child


Do you remember the night we were lost
In the shade of the blackthorn and the chill of the frost
Oh thanks be to Jesus we did what was right
And your maidenhead still is your pillar of light


The priests and the friars, approach me with dread
Because I still love you, my life and youre dead
I still will be your shelter through rain and through storm
And with you in your cold grave I cannot sleep warm
____________________________________

“I shall go the way of the open sea, To the lands I knew before you came, And the cool ocean breezes shall blow from me, The memory of your name”
Laurence Hope


____________________________________



Hisashiburi no kaisei IEROO BODI wa D.I.Y.
Haru no shippo tsukamaeru jyunbi wa OK sa
Yousho ni HANHOKKU ano mori wo mezashiteta hazu ga

"KAANABI" nante ME jyanai! ...mune hattetano wa dare dayo?
Koi nuno youna "GOMEN" no hitomi ni kousansa

Umibe de asonderu RETORIBAA no PORISU ni kikou ka?


AM RAJIO GOKIGEN na sunday yakusoku shite kureteru
Hajikeru youna namishibuki ga bokura no SAUNDO

Shuuni ichido no DEETO sae mama naranu youna futari no
Kiseki no youna kyuujitsu nonbiri kaze makase

Hamabe de shiosai no hizamakura nante no ma ii yo ne

POTTO ni tsumeta koucha wo sarige ni susumeru egao ga
Moshikashitara ichiban haru iro hansoku sa
Umibe de jyarete iru RETORIBAA wo minaratte bokuramo!


MAIPEESU na SHIISAIDO ga HAIUEI tobasu yori niatteru
Masshiro na vacation map kowaki ni kakaete


____________________________________



____________________________________

A boom boom bâ

Kélé, filla, saba, nani, norou

A boom boom bâ
Can you hear my heart beat in this world?
A boom boom bâ
Do you know that behind all these words
A boom boom bâ
Lies a deep desire Kamélé hé?
A boom boom bâ
Mé kouman mé fora y bamę
Are my dreams to be all I can do?
Lay o lay above, lay o lay below
And he said Annie will show them a new way
Mé kouman mé fora y bamę
Kélé, filla, saba, nani, norou

A boom boom bâ
Can you hear my heart beat in this world?
A boom boom bâ
Do you know that behind all these words
A boom boom bâ
Lies a deep desire Kamélé hé?
A boom boom bâ
Mé kouman mé fora y bamę
Are my dreams to be all I can do?
Lay o lay above, lay o lay below
And he said Annie will show them a new way
Mé kouman mé fora y bamę
Kélé, filla, saba, nani, norou

A boom boom bâ
Can you hear my heart beat in this world?
A boom boom bâ
Do you know that behind all these words
A boom boom bâ
Lies a deep desire Kamélé hé?
A boom boom bâ
Mé kouman mé fora y bamę

Kélé, filla, saba, nani, norou

A boom boom bâ
Aligna donguiri ma digné
A boom boom bâ
Mé kouman mé for a y bâmę
A boom boom bâ
Aligna donguiri ma digné hé !
A boom boom bâ
Mé kouman mé for a y bâmę

Kélé, filla, saba, nani, norou
Can you hear my heart beat in this world?
Kélé, filla, saba, nani, norou
Can you hear my heart beat in this world?
Kélé, filla, saba, nani, norou
Can you hear my heart beat in this world?
Kélé, filla, saba, nani, norou …