The Silence
I am stretched on your grave -
And will lie there forever...
If your hands were in mine...
I'd be sure we'd not sever
Like a wounded animal, I stand upon the dark, moist earth. Even though summer had just begun to falter slightly, in here, the cold never ceases, and the sun never shines its light upon the earth of the Blessed... Aren't they called that?
I stare at the cold, gray monument.
So fierce.
Merciless.
And my mind starts playing music to me. Piano. So loud in my head, and yet, there is no single sound around. Dreadful, eerie silence. As if it were mocking me, laughing at me for not being able to touch you. For letting a meter and a half of dirt hide you from me.
I can't see your...
Star
You, my dearest, you, my most precious one. You, the one I love the most.
And the pain is unbearable.
I cannot sleep. I feel sick at all food. My eyes... are like glass.
As I collapse on my knees before you, I am nothing more than a weak, pathetic mass of a being, covered with hair. I shiver, part from the cold, and part from...
"I always was weak, wasn't I? Nee, Onee-sama... Never could keep my tears to myself. Never could break down alone, where no one could see me. Never could stand on my own two feet. And deal with it myself. I couldn't. Pathetic, isn't it...? An inconvenience... A nuisance.
Nee...
Onee-sama...
And I cry tears of blood.
And I whisper words of a song I do not know anything about anymore. I whisper slowly as the blood tears touch my lips.
"I still... will be your shelter... through rain... and through storm...
And... with you...
in your cold grave...
I...
cannot...
sleep warm..."
Such a curse, Onee-sama, to be forced to give oneself so utterly and completely. Such a curse. But such a blessing. Has anyone felt like this before...? Has anyone realized what utmost joy can a memory of an embrace bring? A memory that brings a knife straight to the heart, which sucks the sweetest blood out of it, but so much joy does it bring, so much warmth...
The tears burn as they glide down my cheeks.
Onee-sama...
Is this pain going to be in my eyes forever, Onee-sama? Will I imprint an everlasting memory upon my skin, one that will burn, but give me pleasure in its hurt. Because it's one other feeling except this what I am feeling now? Will it be like this forever? Me restricted from any kind of love, crying for an embrace, and my arms still empty, hanging at my sides. And then, I will remember your embrace, and tears will fall on my hands before I realize I shed them. Nee, Onee-sama, will it?
"And though I may have lost my way, all paths lead straight to you..."
A sigh. A deep one. A shaky one. If sighs had colour, this one would be red.
Onee-sama... what does a pathetic excuse for a girl do now. Nee... Tell me, please?
Angels of Death, those vultures, sit on hard, cold stones, with their wings ripped and their feathers tousled. And they laugh at me, a lone human girl sitting on a deserted graveyard, in the forest no one had come in for years. Where there's no sun and it smells of winter.
There are no words to describe pain that slices deep into one's core.
Slowly wipe the cheeks colored in blood. Gently part the lips, dry from the cold. Breathe in, how much the weakened body even can. One glassy, black glance of despair towards the gray stone.
And scream.
26.08.2008. u 16:41
° 2 thoughts of the world ° Print ° # °
design: moi
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Studeni 2008 (1)
Listopad 2008 (1)
Rujan 2008 (1)
Kolovoz 2008 (1)
Lipanj 2008 (1)
Svibanj 2008 (1)
Ožujak 2008 (3)
Veljaèa 2008 (2)
Sijeèanj 2008 (3)
Prosinac 2007 (4)
Studeni 2007 (7)
Dnevnik.hr
Gol.hr
Zadovoljna.hr
Novaplus.hr
NovaTV.hr
DomaTV.hr
Mojamini.tv
coments no/si?
Opis bloga
Mjesto gdje moja malenkost namjerava upisivati što je pukne i kad je pukne i na kojem jeziku je pukne. ;)
~O meni~
Dreams, thoghts, hopes and the spirit of a girl once called Hime-sama... Who wants to be one... Who aspires for her life and being to express elegance and art...
Volim ili obožavam (ili obožavam ili volim):
- more
- anime
- pjevati
- eleganciju
- crtati
- glazbu
- prirodu
- plesati
- svoju obitelj
- pisati
- èitati
- pristojnost
- mjuzikle
- dobre filmove i predstave
- biti na pozornici
- lijepu odjeæu
- lijepu šminku
- Japan
- japanski
- francuski
- grèki
- latinski
- prevoditi
- e-mail
- istinu
- snove
.
.
.
Snovi (stvarni ili nestvarni):
- postati seiyuu
- pjevati kao Amy Lee
- znati japanski skoro kao materinji
- dobro znati francuski
- dug vijek i puno komentara ovog bloga xD
- nepresušan izvor dobrih pjesama
- usavršiti crtanje i bojanje u kompjuterskim programima
- duga jaka lijepa kosa (XD)
- imati klavir za vježbanje
- znati ga svirati xD
- biti sretna
.
.
.
ANIME:
SHOUJO KAKUMEI UTENA!!!
Air
Basilisk
Fruits basket
Sailor Moon
Kimi Ga Nozomu Eien
Super Gals (dijelom)
Koi Kaze
Aa Megami Sama
Reservoir Chronicle Tsubasa (dijelom)
Pokemon (da xDD)
Digimon (još veæi da xDDD)
Digimon Tamers (što reæi?)
Candy Candy
Dragon Ball (dijelom... xDDD)
Nadam se da æe ova lista narasti veelika... :D
MANGA
Mei-chan No Shitsuji
Princess Ai
Tokyo Mew Mew (arigatou, Onee-chan and Dunja-hime!)
Tsubasa Chronicle (dijelom)
Namida Nochi Happi- Endo (Happy End After the Tears)
Shuffle (dijelom)
___________________________________
MUZIKA
All time favorites:
~*~
Ogata Megumi-sama
Evanescence
Anime OP&ED
Jean Michel Jarre
The Phantom of the Opera
~*~
Lijep stil i/ili slušam ponekad:
Velvet Underground
Johnny Cash
Nick Cave
Darko Rundek
Vaya Con Dios
Sinead O'Connor
Om
Pink Floyd
I sve što mi zapne za uho...
___________________________________
I *ahem* to je to :D
MSN: eternal_starlight@mail.inet.hr
___________________________________
C'est le malaise du moment
L'épidémie qui s'étend
La fête est finie on descend
Les pensées qui glacent la raison
Paupières baissées, visage gris
Surgissent les fantomes de notre lit
On ouvre le loquet de la grille
Du taudit qu'on appelle maison
Protect me from what I want
Protect me from what I want
Protect me from what I want
Protect me
Protect me
Protège-moi, protège-moi
Sommes nous les jouets du destin
Souviens toi des moments divins
Planants, éclatés au matin
Et maintenant nous sommes tout seuls
Perdus les reves de s'aimer
Les temps où on avait rien fait
Il nous reste toute une vie pour pleurer
Et maintenant nous sommes tout seuls
Protect me from what I want
Protect me from what I want
Protect me from what I want
Protect me
Protect me
___________________________________
___________________________________
“There are only two tragedies in life: one is not getting what one wants, and the other is getting it.”
Oscar Wilde
“Illusion is the first of all pleasures.”
Oscar Wilde
___________________________________
I am stretched on your grave and will lie there forever
If your hands were in mine I'd be sure we'd not sever
My apple tree my brightness, it's time we were together
For I smell of the earth and I'm worn by the weather
When my family thinks that I'm safe in my bed
From night until morning I am stretched at your head
Calling out to the earth with tears hot and wild
My grief for the girl that I loved as a child
Do you remember the night we were lost
In the shade of the blackthorn and the chill of the frost
Oh thanks be to Jesus we did what was right
And your maidenhead still is your pillar of light
The priests and the friars, approach me with dread
Because I still love you, my life and youre dead
I still will be your shelter through rain and through storm
And with you in your cold grave I cannot sleep warm
____________________________________
“I shall go the way of the open sea, To the lands I knew before you came, And the cool ocean breezes shall blow from me, The memory of your name”
Laurence Hope
____________________________________
Hisashiburi no kaisei IEROO BODI wa D.I.Y.
Haru no shippo tsukamaeru jyunbi wa OK sa
Yousho ni HANHOKKU ano mori wo mezashiteta hazu ga
"KAANABI" nante ME jyanai! ...mune hattetano wa dare dayo?
Koi nuno youna "GOMEN" no hitomi ni kousansa
Umibe de asonderu RETORIBAA no PORISU ni kikou ka?
AM RAJIO GOKIGEN na sunday yakusoku shite kureteru
Hajikeru youna namishibuki ga bokura no SAUNDO
Shuuni ichido no DEETO sae mama naranu youna futari no
Kiseki no youna kyuujitsu nonbiri kaze makase
Hamabe de shiosai no hizamakura nante no ma ii yo ne
POTTO ni tsumeta koucha wo sarige ni susumeru egao ga
Moshikashitara ichiban haru iro hansoku sa
Umibe de jyarete iru RETORIBAA wo minaratte bokuramo!
MAIPEESU na SHIISAIDO ga HAIUEI tobasu yori niatteru
Masshiro na vacation map kowaki ni kakaete
____________________________________
____________________________________
A boom boom bâ
Kélé, filla, saba, nani, norou
A boom boom bâ
Can you hear my heart beat in this world?
A boom boom bâ
Do you know that behind all these words
A boom boom bâ
Lies a deep desire Kamélé hé?
A boom boom bâ
Mé kouman mé fora y bamê
Are my dreams to be all I can do?
Lay o lay above, lay o lay below
And he said Annie will show them a new way
Mé kouman mé fora y bamê
Kélé, filla, saba, nani, norou
A boom boom bâ
Can you hear my heart beat in this world?
A boom boom bâ
Do you know that behind all these words
A boom boom bâ
Lies a deep desire Kamélé hé?
A boom boom bâ
Mé kouman mé fora y bamê
Are my dreams to be all I can do?
Lay o lay above, lay o lay below
And he said Annie will show them a new way
Mé kouman mé fora y bamê
Kélé, filla, saba, nani, norou
A boom boom bâ
Can you hear my heart beat in this world?
A boom boom bâ
Do you know that behind all these words
A boom boom bâ
Lies a deep desire Kamélé hé?
A boom boom bâ
Mé kouman mé fora y bamê
Kélé, filla, saba, nani, norou
A boom boom bâ
Aligna donguiri ma digné
A boom boom bâ
Mé kouman mé for a y bâmê
A boom boom bâ
Aligna donguiri ma digné hé !
A boom boom bâ
Mé kouman mé for a y bâmê
Kélé, filla, saba, nani, norou
Can you hear my heart beat in this world?
Kélé, filla, saba, nani, norou
Can you hear my heart beat in this world?
Kélé, filla, saba, nani, norou
Can you hear my heart beat in this world?
Kélé, filla, saba, nani, norou …
