mozgoBLUDstvo https://blog.dnevnik.hr/mozgobludstvo

nedjelja, 21.10.2007.

to go with the flow

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I can feel my soul sheaking, heart slowing down, more and more every day. Don't know how it happend realy, or why. But I'm loosing it, the faith, the only thing I believed I had tons nad tons stashed away in department „just in case“. I run out of optimism, and my whole body is filling out with awful stinch of fear. Fear of becoming average, borring person with allready defined future. I stoped waiting for a change, stopped believing that I'm just in the crossroad. I get it now... this is it. This is me. There won't be any miracle. I often think about my weaknesses, I'm often angry on myself for them. But I reasiled that I never tried to get rid of them. And now they are the size of a mountain, and they are not going anywhere. Not anymore. And now, I'm stuck in shit over my head, trying to breath and to find a tiny sparcle of hope. Small reason or anything that I can look forward to.

I'm sad cause I'm living stupid life. When I was little that was my greatest fear – to go with the flow.

21.10.2007. u 20:40 • 2 Komentara • Print • # • ^

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