Men are equal; it is not birth but virtue that makes the difference.
Statistics: The only science that enables different experts using the same figures to draw different conclusions.
The release of atomic energy has not created a new problem. It has merely made more urgent the necessity of solving an existing one.
All God does is watch us and kill us when we get boring. We must never, ever be boring.
I'm glad I didn't have to fight in any war. I'm glad I didn't have to pick up a gun. I'm glad I didn't get killed or kill somebody. I hope my kids enjoy the same lack of manhood.
The louder he talked of his honor, the faster we counted our spoons.
Rest is the sweet sauce of labor.
Here's to the crazy ones, the misfits, the rebels, the troublemakers, the round pegs in the square holes... the ones who see things differently -- they're not fond of rules... You can quote them, disagree with them, glorify or vilify them, but the only thing you can't do is ignore them because they change things... they push the human race forward, and while some may see them as the crazy ones, we see genius, because the ones who are crazy enough to think that they can change the world, are the ones who do.
I felt the doors open near me, and then saw a confusion of booted feet moving close by.
Happiness lies in the joy of achievement and the thrill of creative effort.
I believe in God, only I spell it Nature.
Even if you're on the right track, you'll get run over if you just sit there.
Reveal not every secret you have to a friend, for how can you tell but that friend may hereafter become an enemy. And bring not all mischief you are able to upon an enemy, for he may one day become your friend.
Wisdom is knowing what to do next; virtue is doing it.
Love yourself first and everything else falls into line. You really have to love yourself to get anything done in this world.
The crowd gives the leader new strength.
There is a tragic flaw in our precious Constitution, and I don't know what can be done to fix it. This is it: Only nut cases want to be president.
The first vehicle that screamed past -- an ambulance -- didn't even slow down.
I heard Jolu respond, then felt the thump he was dealt, too.
Famous remarks are very seldom quoted correctly.
All love that has not friendship for its base, is like a mansion built upon sand.
The great art of giving consists in this: the gift should cost very little and yet be greatly coveted, so that it may be the more highly appreciated.
It is common sense to take a method and try it. If it fails, admit it frankly and try another. But above all, try something.
Anything looked at closely becomes wonderful.
Everything of importance has been said before by somebody who did not discover it.
I use an optimistic, positive approach to deal with my symptoms and it came the hard way, before I learned to laugh with myself a little.
It's very hard to take yourself too seriously when you look at the world from outer space.
You must not think me necessarily foolish because I am facetious, nor will I consider you necessarily wise because you are grave.
Each body has its art...
Never help a child with a task at which he feels he can succeed.
To believe in God or in a guiding force because someone tells you to is the height of stupidity. We are given senses to receive our information within. With our own eyes we see, and with our own skin we feel. With our intelligence, it is intended that we understand. But each person must puzzle it out for himself or herself.
When we are unhurried and wise, we perceive that only great and worthy things have any permanent and absolute existence, that petty fears and petty pleasures are but the shadow of the reality.
There is an alchemy in sorrow. It can be transmuted into wisdom, which, if it does not bring joy, can yet bring happiness.
As I neared her, I bent to help her up, and was nearly knocked over her.
He had learned over the years that poor people did not feel so poor when allowed to give occasionally.
A mind troubled by doubt cannot focus on the course to victory.
It is easier to exclude harmful passions than to rule them, and to deny them admittance than to control them after they have been admitted.
If you believe the doctors, nothing is wholesome; if you believe the theologians, nothing is innocent; if you believe the military, nothing is safe.
Be honorable yourself if you wish to associate with honorable people.
I have often wished I had time to cultivate modesty... But I am too busy thinking about myself.
Is there life before death?
A few seconds later, I tripped over a steel staircase, bashing my shins.
When I was a kid my parents moved a lot, but I always found them.
I wrote myself a check for ten million dollars for acting services rendered and dated it Thanksgiving 1995. I put it in my wallet and it deteriorated. And then, just before Thanksgiving 1995, I found out I was going to make ten million dollars for Dumb & Dumber. I put that check in the casket with my father because it was our dream together.
Challenge is a dragon with a gift in its mouth?Tame the dragon and the gift is yours.
There are worse things in life than death. Have you ever spent an evening with an insurance salesman?
The freethinking of one age is the common sense of the next.
Most of the basic truths of life sound absurd at first hearing.
What's the earth With all its art, verse, music, worth - Compared with love, found, gained, and kept?
My theory of evolution is that Darwin was adopted.
I have come to the conclusion that politics are too serious a matter to be left to the politicians.
'Never put off until tomorrow what you can do today.' Under the influence of this pestilent morality, I am forever letting tomorrow's work slop backwards into today's, and doing painfully and nervously today what I could do quickly and easily tomorrow.
Meetings are indispensable when you don't want to do anything.
The trouble with having an open mind, of course, is that people will insist on coming along and trying to put things in it.
Have no fear of perfection - you'll never reach it.
To lengthen thy life, lessen thy meals.
Nothing is so good for an ignorant man as silence; and if he was sensible of this he would not be ignorant.
The cloning of humans is on most of the lists of things to worry about from Science, along with behaviour control, genetic engineering, transplanted heads, computer poetry and the unrestrained growth of plastic flowers.
More bodies were roughly shoved in beside me.
When I came back to Dublin I was courtmartialed in my absence and sentenced to death in my absence, so I said they could shoot me in my absence.
We rocked to a stop still on a downslope.
When you make a mistake, don't look back at it long. Take the reason of the thing into your mind and then look forward. Mistakes are lessons of wisdom. The past cannot be changed. The future is yet in your power.
Early morning cheerfulness can be extremely obnoxious.
It is better to offer no excuse than a bad one.
It pays to be obvious, especially if you have a reputation for subtlety.
Never part without loving words to think of during your absence. It may be that you will not meet again in life.
I don't mind what language an opera is sung in so long as it is a language I don't understand.
If you scatter thorns, don't go barefoot.
Talk sense to a fool and he calls you foolish.
He who is not very strong in memory should not meddle with lying.
It's wonderful what we can do if we're always doing.
It is a profitable thing, if one is wise, to seem foolish.
The reason why worry kills more people than work is that more people worry than work.
'Never put off until tomorrow what you can do today.' Under the influence of this pestilent morality, I am forever letting tomorrow's work slop backwards into today's, and doing painfully and nervously today what I could do quickly and easily tomorrow.
Never rely on the glory of the morning nor the smiles of your mother-in-law.
A man without ambition is dead. A man with ambition but no love is dead. A man with ambition and love for his blessings here on earth is ever so alive. Having been alive, it won't be so hard in the end to lie down and rest.
You have to recognize when the right place and the right time fuse and take advantage of that opportunity. There are plenty of opportunities out there. You can't sit back and wait.
When you close your doors, and make darkness within, remember never to say that you are alone, for you are not alone; nay, God is within, and your genius is within. And what need have they of light to see what you are doing?
Winning is important to me, but what brings me real joy is the experience of being fully engaged in whatever I'm doing.
Fall is my favorite season in Los Angeles, watching the birds change color and fall from the trees.
History is indeed little more than the register of the crimes, follies and misfortunes of mankind.
Learning to live in the present moment is part of the path of joy.
A sympathetic Scot summed it all up very neatly in the remark, "You should make a point of trying every experience once, excepting incest and folk dancing."
There is an evil tendency underlying all our technology - the tendency to do what is reasonable even when it isn't any good.
He who labors diligently need never despair; for all things are accomplished by diligence and labor.
The art of war is simple enough. Find out where your enemy is. Get at him as soon as you can. Strike him as hard as you can, and keep moving on.
Humor is always based on a modicum of truth. Have you ever heard a joke about a father-in-law?
I guess we'd be living in a boring, perfect world if everybody wished everybody else well.
The ornament of a house is the friends who frequent it.
Do something every day that you don't want to do; this is the golden rule for acquiring the habit of doing your duty without pain.
I am more and more convinced that our happiness or unhappiness depends more on the way we meet the events of life than on the nature of those events themselves.
Wit makes its own welcome, and levels all distinctions. No dignity, no learning, no force of character, can make any stand against good wit.
Good taste is the enemy of comedy.
Hearing voices no one else can hear isn't a good sign, even in the wizarding world.
If it weren't for baseball, many kids wouldn't know what a millionaire looked like.
I have the worst memory ever so no matter who comes up to me - they're just, like, 'I can't believe you don't remember me!" I'm like, 'Oh Dad I'm sorry!'
There is only one success - to be able to spend your life in your own way.
Insanity: doing the same thing over and over again and expecting different results.
Learning to live in the present moment is part of the path of joy.
Memory feeds imagination.
Looks are part of business. A businessman should never stand out more than his customers. His mannerisms, his clothes, everything about him... Moderation is the key.
The strongest possible piece of advice I would give any young woman is: Don't screw around, and don't smoke.
Try to put your happiness before anyone else's, because you may never have done so in your entire life, if you really think about it, if you are really honest with yourself.
The moment we begin to fear the opinions of others and hesitate to tell the truth that is in us, and from motives of policy are silent when we should speak, the divine floods of light and life no longer flow into our souls.
Posterity is as likely to be wrong as anyone else.
For visions come not to polluted eyes.
It is wonderful how quickly you get used to things, even the most astonishing.
A classic is something that everybody wants to have read and nobody wants to read.
You can have it all. You just can't have it all at once.
The pain of making the necessary sacrifices always hurts more than you think it's going to. I know. It sucks. That being said, doing something seriously creative is one of the most amazing experiences one can have, in this or any other lifetime. If you can pull it off, it's worth it. Even if you don't end up pulling it off, you'll learn many incredible, magical, valuable things. It's NOT doing it when you know you full well you HAD the opportunity- that hurts FAR more than any failure.
You've achieved success in your field when you don't know whether what you're doing is work or play.
We rarely think people have good sense unless they agree with us.
Worries go down better with soup than without.
Talk sense to a fool and he calls you foolish.
Best wide-angle lens? Two steps backward. Look for the 'ah-ha'.
By the time I'd grown up, I naturally supposed that I'd be grown up.
Skiing combines outdoor fun with knocking down trees with your face.
Nothing is impossible. Some things are just less likely than others.
Feet, why do I need them if I have wings to fly?
The art of war is simple enough. Find out where your enemy is. Get at him as soon as you can. Strike him as hard as you can, and keep moving on.
There is no nonsense so errant that it cannot be made the creed of the vast majority by adequate governmental action.
Self-importance is our greatest enemy. Think about it - what weakens us is feeling offended by the deeds and misdeeds of our fellowmen. Our self-importance requires that we spend most of our lives offended by someone.
The dead might as well try to speak to the living as the old to the young.
I like weights. You know where you stand with them. Well, sometimes you're lying under them, trying not to let them crush you, but you see, you KNOW they'd crush you if they could. There's honesty.
Genius is one per cent inspiration, ninety-nine per cent perspiration.
Life is pleasant. Death is peaceful. It's the transition that's troublesome.
If the only prayer you ever say in your whole life is "thank you," that would suffice.
You must not lose faith in humanity. Humanity is an ocean; if a few drops of the ocean are dirty, the ocean does not become dirty.
I stumbled some, then a hand pushed my head down and I was inside the Hummer.
The first step to getting the things you want out of life is this: Decide what you want.
'Never put off until tomorrow what you can do today.' Under the influence of this pestilent morality, I am forever letting tomorrow's work slop backwards into today's, and doing painfully and nervously today what I could do quickly and easily tomorrow.
Everybody likes a kidder, but nobody lends him money.
Good habits, which bring our lower passions and appetites under automatic control, leave our natures free to explore the larger experiences of life.
How could you be a Great Man if history brought you no Great Events, or brought you to them at the wrong time, too young, too old?
There are more tears shed over answered prayers than over unanswered prayers.
Misquotations are the only quotations that are never misquoted.
One of the best rules in conversation is, never to say a thing which any of the company can reasonably wish had been left unsaid.
I'd never really believed in terrorists before.
Humor is always based on a modicum of truth. Have you ever heard a joke about a father-in-law?
I was sick of cars driving right past me.
I am not sincere, even when I say I am not.
Part of being creative is learning how to protect your freedom. That includes freedom from avarice.
Love truth, and pardon error.
Normal is not something to aspire to, it's something to get away from.
I went up the stairs cautiously, not able to use my hands.
Keep on going and the chances are you will stumble on something, perhaps when you are least expecting it. I have never heard of anyone stumbling on something sitting down.
Wisdom is knowing what to do next; virtue is doing it.
The moment we begin to fear the opinions of others and hesitate to tell the truth that is in us, and from motives of policy are silent when we should speak, the divine floods of light and life no longer flow into our souls.
Failures are finger posts on the road to achievement.
I believe that every now and then it is important to laugh at ourselves and take a lighter approach to our life conditions.
The coldest winter I ever spent was a summer in San Francisco.
Writing gives you the illusion of control, and then you realize it's just an illusion, that people are going to bring their own stuff into it.
Nothing is said that has not been said before.
When you have got an elephant by the hind leg, and he is trying to run away, it's best to let him run.
The crowd gives the leader new strength.
Three o'clock is always too late or too early for anything you want to do.
Do something. If it doesn't work, do something else. No idea is too crazy.
Beware the pull on your heartstrings -- it's often the pursestrings that are actually being reached for.
The first precept was never to accept a thing as true until I knew it as such without a single doubt.
You should not live one way in private, another in public.
The happiest is the person who suffers the least pain; the most miserable who enjoys the least pleasure.
We bear the world and we make it... There was never a great man who had not a great mother - it is hardly an exaggeration.
If you would be known, and not know, vegetate in a village; If you would know, and not be known, live in a city.
All human situations have their inconveniences. We feel those of the present but neither see nor feel those of the future; and hence we often make troublesome changes without amendment, and frequently for the worse.
I like to play blackjack. I'm not addicted to gambling, I'm addicted to sitting in a semi-circle.
There is surely a piece of divinity in us, something that was before the elements, and owes no homage unto the sun.
Sorrow was like the wind. It came in gusts.
Everybody knows if you are too careful you are so occupied in being careful that you are sure to stumble over something.
My philosophy is that not only are you responsible for your life, but doing the best at this moment puts you in the best place for the next moment.
The meeting of two personalities is like the contact of two chemical substances: if there is any reaction, both are transformed.
The best thing to give to your enemy is forgiveness; to an opponent, tolerance; to a friend, your heart; to your child, a good example; to a father, deference; to your mother, conduct that will make her proud of you; to yourself, respect; to all men, charity.
The reason grandparents and grandchildren get along so well is that they have a common enemy.
Seize opportunity by the beard, for it is bald behind.
Nothing contributes so much to tranquilizing the mind as a steady purpose - a point on which the soul may fix its intellectual eye.
We inhereit from our ancestors gifts so often taken for granted... Each of us contains within... this inheritance of soul. We are links between the ages, containing past and present expectations, sacred memories and future promise.
No one gossips about other people's secret virtues.
Noble life demands a noble architecture for noble uses of noble men. Lack of culture means what it has always meant: ignoble civilization and therefore imminent downfall.
The roses, the lovely notes, the dining and dancing are all welcome and splendid. But when the Godiva is gone, the gift of real love is having someone who'll go the distance with you. Someone who, when the wedding day limo breaks down, is willing to share a seat on the bus.
A wise man can see more from the bottom of a well than a fool can from a mountain top .
I used to believe that marriage would diminish me, reduce my options. That you had to be someone less to live with someone else when, of course, you have to be someone more.
The freedom of all is essential to my freedom.
Is love supposed to last throughout all time, or is it like trains changing at random stops. If I loved her, how could I leave her? If I felt that way then, how come I don't feel anything now?
I am free of all prejudice. I hate everyone equally.
The more freedom we enjoy, the greater the responsibility we bear, toward others as well as ourselves.
A good man would prefer to be defeated than to defeat injustice by evil means.
There is a tragic flaw in our precious Constitution, and I don't know what can be done to fix it. This is it: Only nut cases want to be president.
As long as you derive inner help and comfort from anything, keep it.
You cannot run away from a weakness; you must sometimes fight it out or perish. And if that be so, why not now, and where you stand?
Challenge is a dragon with a gift in its mouth?Tame the dragon and the gift is yours.
I was gratified to be able to answer promptly. I said I don't know.
I shouted, and earned a hard thump on my head for my trouble.
Why the hell would terrorists kidnap a bunch of high school students?
My grandmother started walking five miles a day when she was sixty. She's ninety-seven now, and we don't know where the hell she is.
Man is distinguished from all other creatures by the faculty of laughter.
Listen. Do not have an opinion while you listen because frankly, your opinion doesn?t hold much water outside of Your Universe. Just listen. Listen until their brain has been twisted like a dripping towel and what they have to say is all over the floor.
Human beings have an inalienable right to invent themselves.
Anxiety is the dizziness of freedom.
The 'Net is a waste of time, and that's exactly what's right about it.
You don't stop laughing because you grow old. You grow old because you stop laughing.
Be careful that victories do not carry the seed of future defeats.
It's important to begin a search on a full stomach.
History is indeed little more than the register of the crimes, follies and misfortunes of mankind.
Humor is the only test of gravity, and gravity of humor; for a subject which will not bear raillery is suspicious, and a jest which will not bear serious examination is false wit.
You freeze where you are, time stops, and your heart thunders in your ears.
Never eat more than you can lift.
Each body has its art...
Beginning today, treat everyone you meet as if they were going to be dead by midnight. Extend them all the care, kindness and understanding you can muster. Your life will never be the same again.
The release of atomic energy has not created a new problem. It has merely made more urgent the necessity of solving an existing one.
Fall is my favorite season in Los Angeles, watching the birds change color and fall from the trees.
Never let the demands of tomorrow interfere with the pleasures and excitement of today.
The people who are regarded as moral luminaries are those who forego ordinary pleasures themselves and find compensation in interfering with the pleasures of others.
To be nobody but yourself in a world which is doing its best day and night to make you like everybody else means to fight the hardest battle which any human being can fight and never stop fighting.
Our lives teach us who we are.
Curiosity killed the cat, but for a while I was a suspect.
It is a good rule in life never to apologize. The right sort of people do not want apologies, and the wrong sort take a mean advantage of them.
I don't mind what language an opera is sung in so long as it is a language I don't understand.
The only time to buy these is on a day with no 'y' in it.
It's very hard to take yourself too seriously when you look at the world from outer space.
Many people weigh the guilt they will feel against the pleasure of the forbidden action they want to take.
Memory feeds imagination.
There is still a difference between something and nothing, but it is purely geometrical and there is nothing behind the geometry.
Always be nice to those younger than you, because they are the ones who will be writing about you.
An idealist is one who, on noticing that a rose smells better than a cabbage, concludes that it will also make better soup.
It is not always the same thing to be a good man and a good citizen.
A wise man can see more from the bottom of a well than a fool can from a mountain top .
Set all things in their own peculiar place, and know that order is the greatest grace.
It's the opinion of some that crops could be grown on the moon. Which raises the fear that it may not be long before we're paying somebody not to.
Gratitude is the most exquisite form of courtesy.
The better part of valor is discretion, in the which better part I have saved my life.
Perhaps, after all, America never has been discovered. I myself would say that it had merely been detected.
No one gossips about other people's secret virtues.
Do not envy a sinner; you don't know what disaster awaits him.
Most advances in science come when a person for one reason or another is forced to change fields.
The most exciting phrase to hear in science, the one that heralds new discoveries, is not 'Eureka!' (I found it!) but 'That's funny ...'
There were millions of ways that the world could kill me.
More bodies were roughly shoved in beside me.
With or without religion, you would have good people doing good things and evil people doing evil things. But for good people to do evil things, that takes religion.
That would be a good thing for them to cut on my tombstone: Wherever she went, including here, it was against her better judgment.
He who boasts of his ancestry is praising the deeds of another.
In real life, unlike in Shakespeare, the sweetness of the rose depends upon the name it bears. Things are not only what they are. They are, in very important respects, what they seem to be.
There is nothing more demoralizing than a small but adequate income.
Science is nothing but developed perception, interpreted intent, common sense rounded out and minutely articulated.
Life is divided into the horrible and the miserable.
The meeting of two personalities is like the contact of two chemical substances: if there is any reaction, both are transformed.
Over the years your bodies become walking autobiographies, telling friends and strangers alike of the minor and major stresses of your lives.
In all affairs it's a healthy thing now and then to hang a question mark on the things you have long taken for granted.
Inside myself is a place where I live all alone and that's where you renew your springs that never dry up.
Walking is man's best medicine.
I was not a child prodigy, because a child prodigy is a child who knows as much when it is a child as it does when it grows up.
I find it rather easy to portray a businessman. Being bland, rather cruel and incompetent comes naturally to me.
Everybody likes to go their own way--to choose their own time and manner of devotion.
Even if you're on the right track, you'll get run over if you just sit there.
Preserving health by too severe a rule is a worrisome malady.
The real problem is not whether machines think but whether men do.
Get pleasure out of life...as much as you can. Nobody ever died from pleasure.
The price one pays for pursuing any profession or calling is an intimate knowledge of its ugly side.
Nothing is particularly hard if you divide it into small jobs.
I'd never looked down the barrel of a gun before, but everything you've heard about the experience is true.
You need only reflect that one of the best ways to get yourself a reputation as a dangerous citizen these days is to go about repeating the very phrases which our founding fathers used in the struggle for independence.
Laughing is the sensation of feeling good all over and showing it principally in one spot.
You don't have to cook fancy or complicated masterpieces - just good food from fresh ingredients.
I've grown to realize the joy that comes from little victories is preferable to the fun that comes from ease and the pursuit of pleasure.
You need only claim the event of your life to make yourself yours. When you truly possess all you have been and done, which may take some time, you are fierce with reality.
Where so many hours have been spent in convincing myself that I am right, is there not some reason to fear I may be wrong?
I am more and more convinced that our happiness or unhappiness depends more on the way we meet the events of life than on the nature of those events themselves.
Facts are the enemy of truth.
Paradise is exactly like where you are right now... only much, much better.
Vanessa didn't like it, but I figured a cop wasn't going to stop for a kid waving his hat in the street, not that day. They just might stop if they saw Darryl bleeding there, though. I argued briefly with her and Darryl settled it by lurching to his feet and dragging himself down toward Market Street.
I'd learned my lesson.
I opened my mouth, then shut it, then, very slowly, I held my hands up in front of me.
Maybe the most any of us can expect of ourselves isn't perfection but progress.
If your daily life seems poor, do not blame it; blame yourself, tell yourself that you are not poet enough to call forth its riches.
A classic is something that everybody wants to have read and nobody wants to read.
You should not live one way in private, another in public.
It is better to offer no excuse than a bad one.
A lie can travel halfway around the world while the truth is putting on its shoes.
When everyone is against you, it means that you are absolutely wrong-- or absolutely right.
An honest politician is one who, when he is bought, will stay bought.
I love being married. It's so great to find that one special person you want to annoy for the rest of your life.
A large income is the best recipe for happiness I ever heard of.
It is not enough to do good; one must do it the right way.
No matter what I do, no matter how predictable I try to make my life, it will not be any more predictable than the rest of the world. Which is chaotic.
In all affairs it's a healthy thing now and then to hang a question mark on the things you have long taken for granted.
Never does the human soul appear so strong and noble as when it foregoes revenge and dares to forgive an injury.
The gambling known as business looks with austere disfavor upon the business known as gambling.
Our imagination is the only limit to what we can hope to have in the future.
The crux... is that the vast majority of the mass of the universe seems to be missing.
I'm glad I didn't have to fight in any war. I'm glad I didn't have to pick up a gun. I'm glad I didn't get killed or kill somebody. I hope my kids enjoy the same lack of manhood.
Never part without loving words to think of during your absence. It may be that you will not meet again in life.
I have a theory that the truth is never told during the nine-to-five hours.
The trouble with being poor is that it takes up all of your time.
Life is divided into the horrible and the miserable.
To achieve great things we must live as though we were never going to die.
Repetition does not transform a lie into a truth.
An honest politician is one who, when he is bought, will stay bought.
Order is not pressure which is imposed on society from without, but an equilibrium which is set up from within.
When you go into court you are putting your fate into the hands of twelve people who weren't smart enough to get out of jury duty.
The most erroneous stories are those we think we know best - and therefore never scrutinize or question.
In an industrial society which confuses work and productivity, the necessity of producing has always been an enemy of the desire to create.
My father hated radio and could not wait for television to be invented so he could hate that too.
The scornful nostril and the high head gather not the odors that lie on the track of truth.
The next time a car appeared down Market Street, I stepped right out into the road, waving my arms over my head, shouting.
Liberals are very broadminded: they are always willing to give careful consideration to both sides of the same side.
The louder he talked of his honor, the faster we counted our spoons.
If my mental map was right, we were heading down to Fisherman's Wharf.
Americans will put up with anything provided it doesn't block traffic.
Money frees you from doing things you dislike. Since I dislike doing nearly everything, money is handy.
I often quote myself. It adds spice to my conversation.
I know that you believe that you understood what you think I said, but I am not sure you realize that what you heard is not what I meant.
I don't generally feel anything until noon; then it's time for my nap.
Let not the sands of time get in your lunch.
We rocked to a stop still on a downslope.
Our patience will achieve more than our force.
The people I distrust most are those who want to improve our lives but have only one course of action.
Because we don't think about future generations, they will never forget us.
I was the kid next door's imaginary friend.
Beginning today, treat everyone you meet as if they were going to be dead by midnight. Extend them all the care, kindness and understanding you can muster. Your life will never be the same again.
My mother loved children -- she would have given anything if I had been one.
Don't worry about the world coming to an end today. It's already tomorrow in Australia.
Who were these clowns?
You could get on a boat there, get away. That fit with the terrorism hypothesis.
Have you ever observed that we pay much more attention to a wise passage when it is quoted than when we read it in the original author?
It is not enough to aim; you must hit.
The art of war is simple enough. Find out where your enemy is. Get at him as soon as you can. Strike him as hard as you can, and keep moving on.
I ended up stepping on her stomach as the crowd pushed me past her, but by then I don't think she was feeling anything.
All love that has not friendship for its base, is like a mansion built upon sand.
Sooner or later, we've got to work at it, no matter how many other careers we've had or wanted.
There is only one success - to be able to spend your life in your own way.
There is an alchemy in sorrow. It can be transmuted into wisdom, which, if it does not bring joy, can yet bring happiness.
Each body has its art...
What's another word for Thesaurus?
Facts do not cease to exist because they are ignored.
I mean, I knew that in the abstract there were terrorists somewhere in the world, but they didn't really represent any risk to me.
The people who are regarded as moral luminaries are those who forego ordinary pleasures themselves and find compensation in interfering with the pleasures of others.
We all have strength enough to endure the misfortunes of others.
Time is that quality of nature which keeps events from happening all at once. Lately it doesn't seem to be working.
Get away from the crowd when you can. Keep yourself to yourself, if only for a few hours daily.
We are made to persist. That's how we find out who we are.
It's so much easier to write a resume than to craft a spirit.
Maybe the most any of us can expect of ourselves isn't perfection but progress.
In the name of God, stop a moment, cease your work, look around you.
Obscurity is a good thing. You can fail in obscurity. It removes the fear of failure.
The undertaking of a new action brings new strength.
In an industrial society which confuses work and productivity, the necessity of producing has always been an enemy of the desire to create.
Hares can gambol over the body of a dead lion.
Nothing great in the world has been accomplished without passion.
The truth does not change according to our ability to stomach it.
Don't worry about the world coming to an end today. It's already tomorrow in Australia.
Preserving health by too severe a rule is a worrisome malady.
This country has come to feel the same when Congress is in session as when the baby gets hold of a hammer.
Maybe the most any of us can expect of ourselves isn't perfection but progress.
There ain't no free lunches in this country. And don't go spending your whole life commiserating that you got raw deals. You've got to say, 'I think that if I keep working at this and want it bad enough I can have it.'
Feet, why do I need them if I have wings to fly?
A little government and a little luck are necessary in life, but only a fool trusts either of them.
Have you ever observed that we pay much more attention to a wise passage when it is quoted than when we read it in the original author?
I have often wished I had time to cultivate modesty... But I am too busy thinking about myself.
He will always be a slave who does not know how to live upon a little.
Let not the sands of time get in your lunch.
Anyone who has gumption knows what it is, and anyone who hasn't can never know what it is. So there is no need of defining it.
Van's sweater was soaked in blood.
I looked up and saw a bunch of military-looking guys in coveralls, holding big, bulky rifles and wearing hooded gas masks with tinted face-plates.
There is only one thing a philosopher can be relied upon to do, and that is to contradict other philosophers.
My home is not a place, it is people.
There is a great deal of difference between an eager man who wants to read a book and the tired man who wants a book to read.
I have the worst memory ever so no matter who comes up to me - they're just, like, 'I can't believe you don't remember me!" I'm like, 'Oh Dad I'm sorry!'
Up ahead, I saw someone, a middle-aged lady in a hippie dress, falter and fall.
While we have the gift of life, it seems to me that only tragedy is to allow part of us to die - whether it is our spirit, our creativity, or our glorious uniqueness.
It is not enough to do good; one must do it the right way.
Do not be awe struck by other people and try to copy them. Nobody can be you as efficiently as you can.
Never be a cynic, even a gentle one. Never help out a sneer, even at the devil.
If you don't know where you are going, you will probably end up somewhere else.
The secret of greatness is simple: do better work than any other man in your field - and keep on doing it.
Laughter is supposed to be the best medicine, however, it should never be at the expense of someone?s feelings or ignoring truth.
Try to put your happiness before anyone else's, because you may never have done so in your entire life, if you really think about it, if you are really honest with yourself.
The best of us must sometimes eat our words.
I'd never really believed in terrorists before.
Cheese - milk's leap toward immortality.
Never part without loving words to think of during your absence. It may be that you will not meet again in life.
Anything looked at closely becomes wonderful.
It is impossible to walk rapidly and be unhappy.
I respect faith, but doubt is what gets you an education.
I never know how much of what I say is true.
Never hold discussions with the monkey when the organ grinder is in the room.
Deeds, not words shall speak me.
I was pushed roughly but dispassionately onto my stomach and something went twice around my wrists and then tightened up as well, feeling like baling wire and biting cruelly.
I say luck is when an opportunity comes along, and you're prepared for it.
Against stupidity the gods themselves contend in vain.
It is curious that physical courage should be so common in the world and moral courage so rare.
A smiling face is half the meal.
Learn the art of patience. Apply discipline to your thoughts when they become anxious over the outcome of a goal. Impatience breeds anxiety, fear, discouragement and failure. Patience creates confidence, decisiveness, and a rational outlook, which eventually leads to success.
Computer Science is no more about computers than astronomy is about telescopes.
Most advances in science come when a person for one reason or another is forced to change fields.
Nothing is as certain as that the vices of leisure are gotten rid of by being busy.
Don't mace him!" I shouted over the din. "You'll get us all too.
To achieve great things we must live as though we were never going to die.
Without the capacity to provide its own information, the mind drifts into randomness.
Looks are part of business. A businessman should never stand out more than his customers. His mannerisms, his clothes, everything about him... Moderation is the key.
Sometimes you can't see yourself clearly until you see yourself through the eyes of others.
They can conquer who believe they can.
Some people make headlines while others make history.
Do something every day that you don't want to do; this is the golden rule for acquiring the habit of doing your duty without pain.
Assuming either the Left Wing or the Right Wing gained control of the country, it would probably fly around in circles.
I take it that what all men are really after is some form or perhaps only some formula of peace.
Never does the human soul appear so strong and noble as when it foregoes revenge and dares to forgive an injury.
College isn't the place to go for ideas.
There?s so much comedy on television. Does that cause comedy in the streets?
Go through your phone book, call people and ask them to drive you to the airport. The ones who will drive you are your true friends. The rest aren't bad people; they're just acquaintances.
You could get on a boat there, get away. That fit with the terrorism hypothesis.
You can't separate peace from freedom because no one can be at peace unless he has his freedom.
Late to bed and late to wake will keep you long on money and short on mistakes.
Oh, I don't blame Congress. If I had $600 billion at my disposal, I'd be irresponsible, too.
There are plenty of good five-cent cigars in the country. The trouble is they cost a quarter. What this country needs is a good five-cent nickel.
I never met anybody who said when they were a kid, "I wanna grow up and be a critic."
An idea is salvation by imagination.
I am not young enough to know everything.
My father hated radio and could not wait for television to be invented so he could hate that too.
There is no end to the adventures that we can have if only we seek them with our eyes open.
Realize that true happiness lies within you. Waste no time and effort searching for peace and contentment and joy in the world outside. Remember that there is no happiness in having or in getting, but only in giving. Reach out. Share. Smile. Hug. Happiness is a perfume you cannot pour on others without getting a few drops on yourself.
To repeat what others have said, requires education; to challenge it, requires brains.
Choose the life that is most useful, and habit will make it the most agreeable.
It is better to offer no excuse than a bad one.
Reading well is one of the great pleasures that solitude can afford you.
Self-importance is our greatest enemy. Think about it - what weakens us is feeling offended by the deeds and misdeeds of our fellowmen. Our self-importance requires that we spend most of our lives offended by someone.
When you have got an elephant by the hind leg, and he is trying to run away, it's best to let him run.
A rumor without a leg to stand on will get around some other way.
The whole dream of democracy is to raise the proletarian to the level of stupidity attained by the bourgeois.
The only difference between a rut and a grave... is in their dimensions.
You may be disappointed if you fail, but you are doomed if you don't try.
Plans are only good intentions unless they immediately degenerate into hard work.
A wise man can see more from the bottom of a well than a fool can from a mountain top .
The world tolerates conceit from those who are successful, but not from anybody else.
Over the years your bodies become walking autobiographies, telling friends and strangers alike of the minor and major stresses of your lives.
For visions come not to polluted eyes.
I got up the third step and reached for the fourth, but it wasn't there.
It's not the hours you put in your work that counts, it's the work you put in the hours.
Any transition serious enough to alter your definition of self will require not just small adjustments in your way of living and thinking but a full-on metamorphosis.
I cried out and my own voice was muffled by the hood.
Life is divided into the horrible and the miserable.
Lawyers spend a great deal of their time shoveling smoke.
A doctor saves lives -- It's up to people to create lives that are worth saving.
People were still cramming down the stairs, and more were squeezing past the turnstiles and down the escalators onto the platforms, but it was clear to me that this wasn't going to have a happy ending.
Get away from the crowd when you can. Keep yourself to yourself, if only for a few hours daily.
Sorrow was like the wind. It came in gusts.
Anyone who has gumption knows what it is, and anyone who hasn't can never know what it is. So there is no need of defining it.
Peace is when time doesn't matter as it passes by.
When everyone is against you, it means that you are absolutely wrong-- or absolutely right.
His priority did not seem to be to teach them what he knew, but rather to impress upon them that nothing, not even... knowledge, was foolproof.
If you would be a real seeker after truth, it is necessary that at least once in your life you doubt, as far as possible, all things.
I had no idea how much of this was making it through the muffling bag.
Editor: a person employed by a newspaper, whose business it is to separate the wheat from the chaff, and to see that the chaff is printed.
Let us so live that when we come to die even the undertaker will be sorry.
The louder he talked of his honor, the faster we counted our spoons.
Glory is fleeting, but obscurity is forever.
If it weren't for baseball, many kids wouldn't know what a millionaire looked like.
Three may keep a secret, if two of them are dead.
What children take from us, they give?We become people who feel more deeply, question more deeply, hurt more deeply, and love more deeply.
The supreme irony of life is that hardly anyone gets out of it alive.
He had learned over the years that poor people did not feel so poor when allowed to give occasionally.
Feet, why do I need them if I have wings to fly?
There are worse things in life than death. Have you ever spent an evening with an insurance salesman?
I am doomed to an eternity of compulsive work. No set goal achieved satisfies. Success only breeds a new goal. The golden apple devoured has seeds. It is endless.
There ain't no free lunches in this country. And don't go spending your whole life commiserating that you got raw deals. You've got to say, 'I think that if I keep working at this and want it bad enough I can have it.'
Let not thy will roar, when thy power can but whisper.
It is not much for its beauty that makes a claim upon men's hearts, as for that subtle something, that quality of air that emanates from old trees, that so wonderfully changes and renews a weary spirit.
Most of the basic truths of life sound absurd at first hearing.
If one morning I walked on top of the water across the Potomac River, the headline that afternoon would read "President Can't Swim".
To be able to fill leisure intelligently is the last product of civilization, and at present very few people have reached this level.
Nothing contributes so much to tranquilizing the mind as a steady purpose - a point on which the soul may fix its intellectual eye.
You must not think me necessarily foolish because I am facetious, nor will I consider you necessarily wise because you are grave.
The better part of valor is discretion, in the which better part I have saved my life.
Man is the only animal that can remain on friendly terms with the victims he intends to eat until he eats them.
If you would be known, and not know, vegetate in a village; If you would know, and not be known, live in a city.
Having a holiday weekend without a family member felt like putting on a sweater that had an extra arm.
Zoo: An excellent place to study the habits of human beings.
The nice thing about egotists is that they don't talk about other people.
TV is chewing gum for the eyes.
Part of being creative is learning how to protect your freedom. That includes freedom from avarice.
I don't generally feel anything until noon; then it's time for my nap.
Posterity is as likely to be wrong as anyone else.
Because we don't think about future generations, they will never forget us.
He who boasts of his ancestry is praising the deeds of another.
When we ask for advice, we are usually looking for an accomplice.
I like coincidences. They make me wonder about destiny, and whether free will is an illusion or just a matter of perspective. They let me speculate on the idea of some master plan that, from time to time, we're allowed to see out of the corner of our eye.
I stumbled some, then a hand pushed my head down and I was inside the Hummer.
She screamed as she went down, and I saw her thrashing to get up, but she couldn't, the crowd's pressure was too strong.
Where we have strong emotions, we're liable to fool ourselves.
Art is science made clear.
Without the capacity to provide its own information, the mind drifts into randomness.
Wit makes its own welcome, and levels all distinctions. No dignity, no learning, no force of character, can make any stand against good wit.
Facts are stubborn things; and whatever may be our wishes, our inclinations, or the dictates of our passion, they cannot alter the state of facts and evidence.
It is your work in life that is the ultimate seduction.
A lie can travel halfway around the world while the truth is putting on its shoes.
Memory feeds imagination.
Write down the advice of him who loves you, though you like it not at present.
Lack of money is no obstacle. Lack of an idea is an obstacle.
Excess on occasion is exhilarating. It prevents moderation from acquiring the deadening effect of a habit.
TV is chewing gum for the eyes.
Computer Science is no more about computers than astronomy is about telescopes.
All God does is watch us and kill us when we get boring. We must never, ever be boring.
Preserving health by too severe a rule is a worrisome malady.
It pays to be obvious, especially if you have a reputation for subtlety.
Everything happens to everybody sooner or later if there is time enough.
There are more tears shed over answered prayers than over unanswered prayers.
I sent the club a wire stating, PLEASE ACCEPT MY RESIGNATION. I DON'T WANT TO BELONG TO ANY CLUB THAT WILL ACCEPT ME AS A MEMBER.
As soon as you trust yourself, you will know how to live.
Enjoy your own life without comparing it with that of another.
All great truths begin as blasphemies.
Facts do not cease to exist because they are ignored.
Inspiration does exist, but it must find you working.
Sometimes when you innovate, you make mistakes. It is best to admit them quickly, and get on with improving your other innovations.
Our patience will achieve more than our force.
He's simply got the instinct for being unhappy highly developed.
The function of science fiction is not always to predict the future but sometimes to prevent it.
If you would be known, and not know, vegetate in a village; If you would know, and not be known, live in a city.
Reveal not every secret you have to a friend, for how can you tell but that friend may hereafter become an enemy. And bring not all mischief you are able to upon an enemy, for he may one day become your friend.
Get away from the crowd when you can. Keep yourself to yourself, if only for a few hours daily.
Do not weep; do not wax indignant. Understand.
Like anyone else, there are days I feel beautiful and days I don't, and when I don't, I do something about it.
Never feel self-pity, the most destructive emotion there is. How awful to be caught up in the terrible squirrel cage of self.
Get away from the crowd when you can. Keep yourself to yourself, if only for a few hours daily.
Humor is the only test of gravity, and gravity of humor; for a subject which will not bear raillery is suspicious, and a jest which will not bear serious examination is false wit.
For most men life is a search for the proper manila envelope in which to get themselves filed.
Starting with getting run down by a drunk burning his way down Valencia -- that were infinitely more likely and immediate than terrorists.
I am more and more convinced that our happiness or unhappiness depends more on the way we meet the events of life than on the nature of those events themselves.
When we lose one we love, our bitterest tears are called forth by the memory of hours when we loved not enough.
The gem cannot be polished without friction, nor man perfected without trials.
Cheerfulness, it would appear, is a matter which depends fully as much on the state of things within, as on the state of things without and around us.
Don't be afraid to take a big step if one is indicated. You can't cross a chasm in two small jumps.
Preserving health by too severe a rule is a worrisome malady.
Learn to get in touch with the silence within yourself and know that everything in this life has a purpose.
Each individual woman's body demands to be accepted on its own terms.
The crux... is that the vast majority of the mass of the universe seems to be missing.
There is always some madness in love. But there is also always some reason in madness.
Now is the time for all good men to come to.
Realize that true happiness lies within you. Waste no time and effort searching for peace and contentment and joy in the world outside. Remember that there is no happiness in having or in getting, but only in giving. Reach out. Share. Smile. Hug. Happiness is a perfume you cannot pour on others without getting a few drops on yourself.
I despise the pleasure of pleasing people that I despise.
If you would be a real seeker after truth, it is necessary that at least once in your life you doubt, as far as possible, all things.
Love is the ability and willingness to allow those that you care for to be what they choose for themselves without any insistence that they satisfy you.
When you make a world tolerable for yourself, you make a world tolerable for others.
The place of the father in the modern suburban family is a very small one, particularly if he plays golf.
The habit of giving only enhances the desire to give.
I've never quite believed that one chance is all I get.
I like to play blackjack. I'm not addicted to gambling, I'm addicted to sitting in a semi-circle.
The strongest possible piece of advice I would give any young woman is: Don't screw around, and don't smoke.
Many people weigh the guilt they will feel against the pleasure of the forbidden action they want to take.
I don't own a cell phone or a pager. I just hang around everyone I know, all the time. If someone wants to get a hold of me, they just say 'Mitch,' and I say 'what?' and turn my head slightly.
Write a wise saying and your name will live forever.
You need only claim the event of your life to make yourself yours. When you truly possess all you have been and done, which may take some time, you are fierce with reality.
I like an escalator because an escalator can never break, it can only become stairs. There would never be an escalator temporaly out of order sign, only an escalator temporarily stairs. Sorry for the convenience.
We succeed only as we identify in life, or in war, or in anything else, a single overriding objective, and make all other considerations bend to that one objective.
It is a paradoxical but profoundly true and important principle of life that the most likely way to reach a goal is to be aiming not at that goal itself but at some more ambitious goal beyond it.
The keenest sorrow is to recognize ourselves as the sole cause of all our adversities.
Sometime they'll give a war and nobody will come.
It had only one fault. It was kind of lousy.
Never esteem anything as of advantage to you that will make you break your word or lose your self-respect.
If you would be known, and not know, vegetate in a village; If you would know, and not be known, live in a city.
No matter what I do, no matter how predictable I try to make my life, it will not be any more predictable than the rest of the world. Which is chaotic.
The trouble with having an open mind, of course, is that people will insist on coming along and trying to put things in it.
The more things a man is ashamed of, the more respectable he is.
No great improvements in the lot of mankind are possible until a great change takes place in the fundamental constitution of their modes of thought.
We should every night call ourselves to an account; What infirmity have I mastered today? What passions opposed? What temptation resisted? What virtue acquired? Our vices will abort of themselves if they be brought every day to the shrift.
We all have strength enough to endure the misfortunes of others.
Let us so live that when we come to die even the undertaker will be sorry.
The problem with people who have no vices is that generally you can be pretty sure they're going to have some pretty annoying virtues.
What can you say about a society that says that God is dead and Elvis is alive?
The roses, the lovely notes, the dining and dancing are all welcome and splendid. But when the Godiva is gone, the gift of real love is having someone who'll go the distance with you. Someone who, when the wedding day limo breaks down, is willing to share a seat on the bus.
A chess genius is a human being who focuses vast, little-understood mental gifts and labors on an ultimately trivial human enterprise.
What is the use of a house if you haven't got a tolerable planet to put it on?
Know, first, who you are; and then adorn yourself accordingly.
I am here for a purpose and that purpose is to grow into a mountain, not to shrink to a grain of sand. Henceforth will I apply ALL my efforts to become the highest mountain of all and I will strain my potential until it cries for mercy.
We are always in search of the redeeming formula, the crystallizing thought.
I have enjoyed greatly the second blooming... suddenly you find - at the age of 50, say - that a whole new life has opened before you.
How we remember, what we remember and why we remember form the most personal map of our individuality.
Looks are part of business. A businessman should never stand out more than his customers. His mannerisms, his clothes, everything about him... Moderation is the key.
When we ask for advice, we are usually looking for an accomplice.
A man without ambition is dead. A man with ambition but no love is dead. A man with ambition and love for his blessings here on earth is ever so alive. Having been alive, it won't be so hard in the end to lie down and rest.
Hollywood is a place where they place you under contract instead of under observation.
The trouble with our times is that the future is not what it used to be.
Because we don't think about future generations, they will never forget us.
It was enough to make a body ashamed of the human race.
Happiness is not a station you arrive at, but a manner of traveling.
The undertaking of a new action brings new strength.
You can learn as much - or more - from one glance at a private space as you can from hours of exposure to a public face.
An idealist is one who, on noticing that a rose smells better than a cabbage, concludes that it will also make better soup.
If you really do put a small value upon yourself, rest assured that the world will not raise your price.
Tragedy is when I cut my finger. Comedy is when you walk into an open sewer and die.
The fact that an opinion has been widely held is no evidence whatever that it is not utterly absurd; indeed in view of the silliness of the majority of mankind, a widespread belief is more likely to be foolish than sensible.
We require from buildings two kinds of goodness: first, the doing their practical duty well: then that they be graceful and pleasing in doing it.
Make hunger thy sauce, as a medicine for health.
I don't generally feel anything until noon; then it's time for my nap.
Darryl wasn't in good shape -- he was white-faced and panting.
No one goes there nowadays, it's too crowded.
There are always survivors at a massacre. Among the victors, if nowhere else.
Winning is important to me, but what brings me real joy is the experience of being fully engaged in whatever I'm doing.
It's wonderful what we can do if we're always doing.
We are made to persist. That's how we find out who we are.
My mother loved children -- she would have given anything if I had been one.
A synonym is a word you use when you can't spell the word you first thought of.
The first precept was never to accept a thing as true until I knew it as such without a single doubt.
Do not be awe struck by other people and try to copy them. Nobody can be you as efficiently as you can.
Optimism and hope are our best friends. Let?s reach out and Laugh together at our confounding traits and still, let?s keep in mind that our sympt oms and traits are very real with consequences, never to be underestimated or discounted.
Any transition serious enough to alter your definition of self will require not just small adjustments in your way of living and thinking but a full-on metamorphosis.
After all it is those who have a deep and real inner life who are best able to deal with the irritating details of outer life.
Lack of money is no obstacle. Lack of an idea is an obstacle.
So act that your principle of action might safely be made a law for the whole world.
The radical of one century is the conservative of the next. The radical invents the views. When he has worn them out the conservative adopts them.
One of the keys to happiness is a bad memory.
Hollywood is a place where they place you under contract instead of under observation.
There are more tears shed over answered prayers than over unanswered prayers.
In the name of God, stop a moment, cease your work, look around you.
Lack of money is no obstacle. Lack of an idea is an obstacle.
It is better to offer no excuse than a bad one.
Sometimes love will pick you up by the short hairs...and jerk the heck out of you.
Lawyers spend a great deal of their time shoveling smoke.
There are worse things in life than death. Have you ever spent an evening with an insurance salesman?
Sometimes I've believed as many as six impossible things before breakfast.
A minute's success pays the failure of years.
I've never quite believed that one chance is all I get.
A mind troubled by doubt cannot focus on the course to victory.
Do not weep; do not wax indignant. Understand.
All things are difficult before they are easy.
Sooner or later, we've got to work at it, no matter how many other careers we've had or wanted.
Life is pleasant. Death is peaceful. It's the transition that's troublesome.
People everywhere confuse what they read in newspapers with news.
Lack of money is no obstacle. Lack of an idea is an obstacle.
If one morning I walked on top of the water across the Potomac River, the headline that afternoon would read "President Can't Swim".
The most important thing she'd learned over the years was that there was no way to be a perfect mother and a million ways to be a good one.
She screamed as she went down, and I saw her thrashing to get up, but she couldn't, the crowd's pressure was too strong.
Calamities are of two kinds: misfortunes to ourselves, and good fortune to others.
We rarely think people have good sense unless they agree with us.
The crowd gives the leader new strength.
What's another word for Thesaurus?
The creative is the place where no one else has ever been. You have to leave the city of your comfort and go into the wilderness of your intuition. What you'll discover will be wonderful. What you'll discover will be yourself.
I heard Jolu respond, then felt the thump he was dealt, too.
It is nobler to declare oneself wrong than to insist on being right - especially when one is right.
What some people mistake for the high cost of living is really the cost of high living.
No one gossips about other people's secret virtues.
Glory is fleeting, but obscurity is forever.
Insanity in individuals is something rare - but in groups, parties, nations and epochs, it is the rule.
Treat all disasters as if they were trivialities but never treat a triviality as if it were a disaster.
There is always more misery among the lower classes than there is humanity in the higher.
Humor is always based on a modicum of truth. Have you ever heard a joke about a father-in-law?
Zoo: An excellent place to study the habits of human beings.
We can be sure that the greatest hope for maintaining equilibrium in the face of any situation rests within ourselves.
The faceless, eyeless armed man above me kept his gun very level.
There?s so much comedy on television. Does that cause comedy in the streets?
I prefer the company of peasants because they have not been educated sufficiently to reason incorrectly.
It's takin' whatever comes your way, the good AND the bad, that give life flavor. It's all the stuff rolled together that makes life worth livin'.
Nothing changes your opinion of a friend so surely as success - yours or his.
Our lives teach us who we are.
There is nothing more demoralizing than a small but adequate income.
Three o'clock is always too late or too early for anything you want to do.
You can't have a light without a dark to stick it in.
Your world is made of your memories, and your memories are given to you by your world. The whispering voice of happenstance is always in our ears. 'This is the world. This is the way things are. Look. Pay attention. Remember.'
The Americans have need of the telephone, but we do not. We have plenty of messenger boys.
Real love is a permanently self-enlarging experience.
The most remarkable thing about my mother is that for thirty years she served the family nothing but leftovers. The original meal has never been found.
It is hard to fight an enemy who has outposts in your head.
Posterity is as likely to be wrong as anyone else.
A man without ambition is dead. A man with ambition but no love is dead. A man with ambition and love for his blessings here on earth is ever so alive. Having been alive, it won't be so hard in the end to lie down and rest.
I was gratified to be able to answer promptly. I said I don't know.
Part of being creative is learning how to protect your freedom. That includes freedom from avarice.
By the time I'd grown up, I naturally supposed that I'd be grown up.
As I neared her, I bent to help her up, and was nearly knocked over her.
It pays to be obvious, especially if you have a reputation for subtlety.
When we are unhurried and wise, we perceive that only great and worthy things have any permanent and absolute existence, that petty fears and petty pleasures are but the shadow of the reality.
You can have it all. You just can't have it all at once.
I was gratified to be able to answer promptly. I said I don't know.
Things are only impossible until they're not.
I like an escalator because an escalator can never break, it can only become stairs. There would never be an escalator temporaly out of order sign, only an escalator temporarily stairs. Sorry for the convenience.
I like weights. You know where you stand with them. Well, sometimes you're lying under them, trying not to let them crush you, but you see, you KNOW they'd crush you if they could. There's honesty.
Speak when you are angry--and you will make the best speech you'll ever regret.
The meeting of two personalities is like the contact of two chemical substances: if there is any reaction, both are transformed.
Joy is prayer - Joy is strength - Joy is love - Joy is a net of love by which you can catch souls.
If you would be a real seeker after truth, it is necessary that at least once in your life you doubt, as far as possible, all things.
Deeds, not words shall speak me.
Nothing is so awesomely unfamiliar as the familiar that discloses itself at the end of a journey.
You have to recognize when the right place and the right time fuse and take advantage of that opportunity. There are plenty of opportunities out there. You can't sit back and wait.
An honest politician is one who, when he is bought, will stay bought.
Don't be afraid to take a big step if one is indicated. You can't cross a chasm in two small jumps.
I am more and more convinced that our happiness or unhappiness depends more on the way we meet the events of life than on the nature of those events themselves.
From the moment I picked up your book until I laid it down, I was convulsed with laughter. Some day I intend reading it.
Sometimes I've believed as many as six impossible things before breakfast.
Learn the art of patience. Apply discipline to your thoughts when they become anxious over the outcome of a goal. Impatience breeds anxiety, fear, discouragement and failure. Patience creates confidence, decisiveness, and a rational outlook, which eventually leads to success.
You can only cure retail but you can prevent .
All love that has not friendship for its base, is like a mansion built upon sand.
I have been through some terrible things in my life, some of which actually happened.
I take it that what all men are really after is some form or perhaps only some formula of peace.
For the most part, fear is nothing but an illusion. When you share it with someone else, it tends to disappear.
It is a paradoxical but profoundly true and important principle of life that the most likely way to reach a goal is to be aiming not at that goal itself but at some more ambitious goal beyond it.
It is wonderful how quickly you get used to things, even the most astonishing.
The roses, the lovely notes, the dining and dancing are all welcome and splendid. But when the Godiva is gone, the gift of real love is having someone who'll go the distance with you. Someone who, when the wedding day limo breaks down, is willing to share a seat on the bus.
Genius is one per cent inspiration, ninety-nine per cent perspiration.
With or without religion, you would have good people doing good things and evil people doing evil things. But for good people to do evil things, that takes religion.
We cannot destroy kindred: Our chains stretch a little sometimes, but they never break.
I was the kid next door's imaginary friend.
I looked up and saw a bunch of military-looking guys in coveralls, holding big, bulky rifles and wearing hooded gas masks with tinted face-plates.
Life is consciousness.
I don't mind what language an opera is sung in so long as it is a language I don't understand.
If you don't know where you are going, you will probably end up somewhere else.
As a scientist, I am not sure anymore that life can be reduced to a class struggle, to dialectical materialism, or any set of formulas. Life is spontaneous and it is unpredictable, it is magical. I think that we have struggled so hard with the tangible that we have forgotten the intangible.
The truth does not change according to our ability to stomach it.
Where we have strong emotions, we're liable to fool ourselves.
We all have strength enough to endure the misfortunes of others.
Intimacy is being seen and known as the person you truly are.
Hearing voices no one else can hear isn't a good sign, even in the wizarding world.
He who will not reason is a bigot; he who cannot is a fool; and he who dares not is a slave.
Never feel self-pity, the most destructive emotion there is. How awful to be caught up in the terrible squirrel cage of self.
Do something every day that you don't want to do; this is the golden rule for acquiring the habit of doing your duty without pain.
O Lord, help me to be pure, but not yet.
Do it now. It is not safe to leave a generous feeling to the cooling influences of the world.
I feel about airplanes the way I feel about diets. It seems to me they are wonderful things for other people to go on.
The only difference between the Democrats and the Republicans is that the Democrats allow the poor to be corrupt, too.
A man can do all things if he but wills them.
To be able to fill leisure intelligently is the last product of civilization, and at present very few people have reached this level.
The real hero is always a hero by mistake; he dreams of being an honest coward like everybody else.
Feet, why do I need them if I have wings to fly?
Good judgment comes from experience, and experience comes from bad judgment.
You can go a long way with bad legs and a good head.
It really doesn't matter if the person who hurt you deserves to be forgiven. Forgiveness is a gift you give yourself. You have things to do and you want to move on.
The dead might as well try to speak to the living as the old to the young.
I like work: it fascinates me. I can sit and look at it for hours.
A large income is the best recipe for happiness I ever heard of.
Never fear the want of business. A man who qualifies himself well for his calling, never fails of employment.
It is wonderful how quickly you get used to things, even the most astonishing.
Give a man a fish and you feed him for a day. Teach a man to fish and you feed him for a lifetime.
There were millions of ways that the world could kill me.
Illusions are art, for the feeling person, and it is by art that you live, if you do.
Sometimes love will pick you up by the short hairs...and jerk the heck out of you.
Being in politics is like being a football coach. You have to be smart enough to understand the game, and dumb enough to think it's important.
Perhaps, after all, America never has been discovered. I myself would say that it had merely been detected.
The toughest question has always been, "How do you get your ideas?" How do you answer that? It's like asking runners how they run, or singers how they sing. They just do it!
Computer Science is no more about computers than astronomy is about telescopes.
We are what we repeatedly do.
It?s like your batteries get low, and you need to charge them on someone else?s story.
Everybody likes to go their own way--to choose their own time and manner of devotion.
I like work: it fascinates me. I can sit and look at it for hours.
The advantage of a classical education is that it enables you to despise the wealth that it prevents you from achieving.
We should be eternally vigilant against attempts to check the expression of opinions that we loathe.
There are a terrible lot of lies going around the world, and the worst of it is half of them are true.
In our civilization, and under our republican form of government, intelligence is so highly honored that it is rewarded by exemption from the cares of office.
Time is that quality of nature which keeps events from happening all at once. Lately it doesn't seem to be working.
Sometimes love will pick you up by the short hairs...and jerk the heck out of you.
We owe something to extravagance, for thrift and adventure seldom go hand in hand.
The brain is a wonderful organ. It starts working the moment you get up in the morning and does not stop until you get into the office.
Maybe the most any of us can expect of ourselves isn't perfection but progress.
Learn the art of patience. Apply discipline to your thoughts when they become anxious over the outcome of a goal. Impatience breeds anxiety, fear, discouragement and failure. Patience creates confidence, decisiveness, and a rational outlook, which eventually leads to success.
Let us so live that when we come to die even the undertaker will be sorry.
I am free of all prejudice. I hate everyone equally.
What's another word for Thesaurus?
Set all things in their own peculiar place, and know that order is the greatest grace.
Terrorists killed a lot fewer people than bathroom falls and accidental electrocutions.
Neither did the cop car that went past, nor the firetruck, nor the next three cop-cars.
Be careful that victories do not carry the seed of future defeats.
We play the hands of cards life gives us. And the worst hands can make us the best players.
Calamities are of two kinds: misfortunes to ourselves, and good fortune to others.
What's the earth With all its art, verse, music, worth - Compared with love, found, gained, and kept?
Have no fear of perfection - you'll never reach it.
Sack over my head and cinched it tight around my windpipe.
As long as you derive inner help and comfort from anything, keep it.
Resolve to edge in a little reading every day, if it is but a single sentence. If you gain fifteen minutes a day, it will make itself felt at the end of the year.
The summer night is like a perfection of thought.
Nothing is more conducive to peace of mind than not having any opinions at all.
If you're trying to take a roomful of people by surprise, it's a lot easier to hit your targets if you don't yell going through the door.
Listen. Do not have an opinion while you listen because frankly, your opinion doesn?t hold much water outside of Your Universe. Just listen. Listen until their brain has been twisted like a dripping towel and what they have to say is all over the floor.
Up ahead, I saw someone, a middle-aged lady in a hippie dress, falter and fall.
You don't have to cook fancy or complicated masterpieces - just good food from fresh ingredients.
I ran the wrong kind of business, but I did it with integrity.
Vanessa didn't like it, but I figured a cop wasn't going to stop for a kid waving his hat in the street, not that day. They just might stop if they saw Darryl bleeding there, though. I argued briefly with her and Darryl settled it by lurching to his feet and dragging himself down toward Market Street.
Speak properly, and in as few words as you can, but always plainly; for the end of speech is not ostentation, but to be understood.
At my lemonade stand I used to give the first glass away free and charge five dollars for the second glass. The refill contained the antidote.
I kept talking. "Listen -- this is some kind of misunderstanding.
We owe something to extravagance, for thrift and adventure seldom go hand in hand.
Students achieving Oneness will move on to Twoness.
Youth is a wonderful thing. What a crime to waste it on children.
You need only claim the event of your life to make yourself yours. When you truly possess all you have been and done, which may take some time, you are fierce with reality.
Never part without loving words to think of during your absence. It may be that you will not meet again in life.
There is no end to the adventures that we can have if only we seek them with our eyes open.
Life isn't fair. It's just fairer than death, that's all.
The first vehicle that screamed past -- an ambulance -- didn't even slow down.
We thought, because we had power, we had wisdom.
Good company and good discourse are the very sinews of virtue.
If you would be known, and not know, vegetate in a village; If you would know, and not be known, live in a city.
Calamities are of two kinds: misfortunes to ourselves, and good fortune to others.
Nothing in the world can take the place of Persistence. Talent will not; nothing is more common than unsuccessful men with talent. Genius will not; unrewarded genius is almost a proverb. Education will not; the world is full of educated derelicts. Persistence and determination alone are omnipotent. The slogan 'Press On' has solved and always will solve the problems of the human race.
Listen. Do not have an opinion while you listen because frankly, your opinion doesn?t hold much water outside of Your Universe. Just listen. Listen until their brain has been twisted like a dripping towel and what they have to say is all over the floor.
Perhaps, after all, America never has been discovered. I myself would say that it had merely been detected.
Things won are done; joy's soul lies in the doing.
What's another word for Thesaurus?
TV is chewing gum for the eyes.
Nothing is said that has not been said before.
One of the keys to happiness is a bad memory.
The car rocked back and forth and tipped uphill.
Zoo: An excellent place to study the habits of human beings.
The next time a car appeared down Market Street, I stepped right out into the road, waving my arms over my head, shouting.
Books...are like lobster shells, we surround ourselves with 'em, then we grow out of 'em and leave 'em behind, as evidence of our earlier stages of development.
Up ahead, I saw someone, a middle-aged lady in a hippie dress, falter and fall.
It felt like they used a baton or something -- it was harder than anyone had ever hit me in the head before.
Our imagination is the only limit to what we can hope to have in the future.
Over the years your bodies become walking autobiographies, telling friends and strangers alike of the minor and major stresses of your lives.
Humor is the only test of gravity, and gravity of humor; for a subject which will not bear raillery is suspicious, and a jest which will not bear serious examination is false wit.
Results! Why, man, I have gotten a lot of results. I know several thousand things that won't work.
Do not be awe struck by other people and try to copy them. Nobody can be you as efficiently as you can.
Nothing takes the taste out of peanut butter quite like unrequited love.
Most folks are about as happy as they make up their minds to be.
Typos are very important to all written form. It gives the reader something to look for so they aren't distracted by the total lack of content in your writing.
Be careful that victories do not carry the seed of future defeats.
Never rely on the glory of the morning nor the smiles of your mother-in-law.
In our civilization, and under our republican form of government, intelligence is so highly honored that it is rewarded by exemption from the cares of office.
Life is a great big canvas; throw all the paint on it you can.
It's wonderful what we can do if we're always doing.
Never feel self-pity, the most destructive emotion there is. How awful to be caught up in the terrible squirrel cage of self.
Electricity is actually made up of extremely tiny particles called electrons, that you cannot see with the naked eye unless you have been drinking.
Our problems are man-made, therefore they may be solved by man. And man can be as big as he wants. No problem of human destiny is beyond human beings.
There is still a difference between something and nothing, but it is purely geometrical and there is nothing behind the geometry.
O Lord, help me to be pure, but not yet.
Oh, I don't blame Congress. If I had $600 billion at my disposal, I'd be irresponsible, too.
I ran the wrong kind of business, but I did it with integrity.
I'm struck by the insidious, computer-driven tendency to take things out of the domain of muscular activity and put them into the domain of mental activity. The transfer is not paying off. Sure, muscles are unreliable, but they represent several million years of accumulated finesse.
Nothing has a stronger influence psychologically on their environment and especially on their children than the unlived life of the parent.
If you would thoroughly know anything, teach it to others.
The ornament of a house is the friends who frequent it.
The average person thinks he isn't.
O, it is excellent to have a giant's strength; but it is tyrannous to use it like a giant.
I define comfort as self-acceptance. When we finally learn that self-care begins and ends with ourselves, we no longer demand sustenance and happiness from others.
Every moment of one's existence one is growing into more or retreating into less.
If my mental map was right, we were heading down to Fisherman's Wharf.
An idealist is one who, on noticing that a rose smells better than a cabbage, concludes that it will also make better soup.
Famous remarks are very seldom quoted correctly.
There isn?t much better in this life than finding a way to spend a few hours in conversation with people you respect and love. You have to carve this time out of your life because you aren?t really living without it.
At my lemonade stand I used to give the first glass away free and charge five dollars for the second glass. The refill contained the antidote.
A synonym is a word you use when you can't spell the word you first thought of.
Now we were descending just as steeply.
Our own physical body possesses a wisdom which we who inhabit the body lack.
Why do writers write? Because it isn't there.
It's a dangerous business going out your front door.
You can learn as much - or more - from one glance at a private space as you can from hours of exposure to a public face.
While we have the gift of life, it seems to me that only tragedy is to allow part of us to die - whether it is our spirit, our creativity, or our glorious uniqueness.
Many people weigh the guilt they will feel against the pleasure of the forbidden action they want to take.
You may be disappointed if you fail, but you are doomed if you don't try.
Sorrow was like the wind. It came in gusts.
Be sincere; be brief; be seated.
It is never too late to give up our prejudices.
It is fortunate to be of high birth, but it is no less so to be of such character that people do not care to know whether you are or are not.
Ordinarily he was insane, but he had lucid moments when he was merely stupid.
The dead might as well try to speak to the living as the old to the young.
I'm struck by the insidious, computer-driven tendency to take things out of the domain of muscular activity and put them into the domain of mental activity. The transfer is not paying off. Sure, muscles are unreliable, but they represent several million years of accumulated finesse.
The brain is a wonderful organ. It starts working the moment you get up in the morning and does not stop until you get into the office.
Be thou the first true merit to befriend, his praise is lost who stays till all commend.
They can conquer who believe they can.
Men are equal; it is not birth but virtue that makes the difference.
It's the soul's duty to be loyal to its own desires. It must abandon itself to its master passion.
Genius is one per cent inspiration, ninety-nine per cent perspiration.
You never know how a horse will pull until you hook him up to a heavy load.
Genius is one per cent inspiration, ninety-nine per cent perspiration.
There is a tragic flaw in our precious Constitution, and I don't know what can be done to fix it. This is it: Only nut cases want to be president.
The only difference between the Democrats and the Republicans is that the Democrats allow the poor to be corrupt, too.
The people who are regarded as moral luminaries are those who forego ordinary pleasures themselves and find compensation in interfering with the pleasures of others.
Whatever you fear most has no power - it is your fear that has the power.
There are several good protections against temptations, but the surest is cowardice.
Doubt 'til thou canst doubt no more...doubt is thought and thought is life. Systems which end doubt are devices for drugging thought.
I used to believe that marriage would diminish me, reduce my options. That you had to be someone less to live with someone else when, of course, you have to be someone more.
Don't be afraid to take a big step if one is indicated. You can't cross a chasm in two small jumps.
To be able to fill leisure intelligently is the last product of civilization, and at present very few people have reached this level.
Even the best of friends need time apart.
Talk sense to a fool and he calls you foolish.
Speak properly, and in as few words as you can, but always plainly; for the end of speech is not ostentation, but to be understood.
God creates men, but they choose each other.
Learning to live in the present moment is part of the path of joy.
Go through your phone book, call people and ask them to drive you to the airport. The ones who will drive you are your true friends. The rest aren't bad people; they're just acquaintances.
To do anything truly worth doing, I must not stand back shivering and thinking of the cold and danger, but jump in with gusto and scramble through as well as I can.
Life is a great big canvas; throw all the paint on it you can.
Many people weigh the guilt they will feel against the pleasure of the forbidden action they want to take.
Money frees you from doing things you dislike. Since I dislike doing nearly everything, money is handy.
Posterity is as likely to be wrong as anyone else.
The ornament of a house is the friends who frequent it.
Looks are part of business. A businessman should never stand out more than his customers. His mannerisms, his clothes, everything about him... Moderation is the key.
Facts are stubborn things; and whatever may be our wishes, our inclinations, or the dictates of our passion, they cannot alter the state of facts and evidence.
The advantage of a classical education is that it enables you to despise the wealth that it prevents you from achieving.
Anything looked at closely becomes wonderful.
It is not enough to aim; you must hit.
Depend not on fortune, but on conduct.
If you are out to describe the truth, leave elegance to the tailor.
Humor is also a way of saying something serious.
The summer night is like a perfection of thought.
No one gossips about other people's secret virtues.
The male is a domestic animal which, if treated with firmness, can be trained to do most things.
Learning to live in the present moment is part of the path of joy.
You need only reflect that one of the best ways to get yourself a reputation as a dangerous citizen these days is to go about repeating the very phrases which our founding fathers used in the struggle for independence.
Having a holiday weekend without a family member felt like putting on a sweater that had an extra arm.
I'm all in favor of keeping dangerous weapons out of the hands of fools. Let's start with typewriters.
Liberals are very broadminded: they are always willing to give careful consideration to both sides of the same side.
We do not believe if we do not live and work according to our belief.
There is an applause superior to that of the multitudes: one's own.
It is not enough to aim; you must hit.
Even if you're on the right track, you'll get run over if you just sit there.
We make a living by what we get, we make a life by what we give.
Paradise is exactly like where you are right now... only much, much better.
I use an optimistic, positive approach to deal with my symptoms and it came the hard way, before I learned to laugh with myself a little.
Over the years your bodies become walking autobiographies, telling friends and strangers alike of the minor and major stresses of your lives.
Inspiration does exist, but it must find you working.
It is a paradoxical but profoundly true and important principle of life that the most likely way to reach a goal is to be aiming not at that goal itself but at some more ambitious goal beyond it.
There were millions of ways that the world could kill me.
O Lord, help me to be pure, but not yet.
They weren't wearing insignia.
If my mental map was right, we were heading down to Fisherman's Wharf.
In America, through pressure of conformity, there is freedom of choice, but nothing to choose from.
Beginning today, treat everyone you meet as if they were going to be dead by midnight. Extend them all the care, kindness and understanding you can muster. Your life will never be the same again.
The freedom of all is essential to my freedom.
Use what you have to run toward your best - that's how I now live my life.
We don't get offered crises, they arrive.
The happiest is the person who suffers the least pain; the most miserable who enjoys the least pleasure.
That would be a good thing for them to cut on my tombstone: Wherever she went, including here, it was against her better judgment.
As long as you derive inner help and comfort from anything, keep it.
Americans will put up with anything provided it doesn't block traffic.
We don't know a millionth of one percent about anything.
Music is essentially useless, as life is.
Read over your compositions, and wherever you meet with a passage which you think is particularly fine, strike it out.
To be willing to die for an idea is to set a rather high price on conjecture.
The aim of life is self-development. To realize one's nature perfectly - that is what each of us is here for.
Don't ever take a fence down until you know the reason it was put up.
Always do right. This will gratify some people and astonish the rest.
The best of us must sometimes eat our words.
Facts are the enemy of truth.
You must not lose faith in humanity. Humanity is an ocean; if a few drops of the ocean are dirty, the ocean does not become dirty.
Whenever people agree with me I always feel I must be wrong.
Where so many hours have been spent in convincing myself that I am right, is there not some reason to fear I may be wrong?
Our own physical body possesses a wisdom which we who inhabit the body lack.
We need anything politically important rationed out like Pez: small, sweet, and coming out of a funny, plastic head.
The happiest is the person who suffers the least pain; the most miserable who enjoys the least pleasure.
Only some people get what they want. Those are the people who show up to get it.
Level with your child by being honest. Nobody spots a phony quicker than a child.
Never read a book through merely because you have begun it.
Fall is my favorite season in Los Angeles, watching the birds change color and fall from the trees.
The car skidded to a stop just in front of me, and I jumped back and lost my balance and ended up on the road.
My friends are my estate.
If a dog jumps in your lap, it is because he is fond of you; but if a cat does the same thing, it is because your lap is warmer.
Experience is a good teacher, but she send in terrific bills.
Where we have strong emotions, we're liable to fool ourselves.
Cheese - milk's leap toward immortality.
When you have got an elephant by the hind leg, and he is trying to run away, it's best to let him run.
The ornament of a house is the friends who frequent it.
Anything looked at closely becomes wonderful.
Nothing in the world can take the place of Persistence. Talent will not; nothing is more common than unsuccessful men with talent. Genius will not; unrewarded genius is almost a proverb. Education will not; the world is full of educated derelicts. Persistence and determination alone are omnipotent. The slogan 'Press On' has solved and always will solve the problems of the human race.
Somebody has to do something, and it's just incredibly pathetic that it has to be us.
Many people weigh the guilt they will feel against the pleasure of the forbidden action they want to take.
A man without ambition is dead. A man with ambition but no love is dead. A man with ambition and love for his blessings here on earth is ever so alive. Having been alive, it won't be so hard in the end to lie down and rest.
We cannot destroy kindred: Our chains stretch a little sometimes, but they never break.
It is my hope that I can assist you in getting here too.
I have enjoyed greatly the second blooming... suddenly you find - at the age of 50, say - that a whole new life has opened before you.
Realize that true happiness lies within you. Waste no time and effort searching for peace and contentment and joy in the world outside. Remember that there is no happiness in having or in getting, but only in giving. Reach out. Share. Smile. Hug. Happiness is a perfume you cannot pour on others without getting a few drops on yourself.
Never fear the want of business. A man who qualifies himself well for his calling, never fails of employment.
If you believe the doctors, nothing is wholesome; if you believe the theologians, nothing is innocent; if you believe the military, nothing is safe.
We can be sure that the greatest hope for maintaining equilibrium in the face of any situation rests within ourselves.
As a well-spent day brings happy sleep, so life well used brings happy death.
He was one of those men who think that the world can be saved by writing a pamphlet.
If one morning I walked on top of the water across the Potomac River, the headline that afternoon would read "President Can't Swim".
I ran the wrong kind of business, but I did it with integrity.
We are what we repeatedly do.
I'm going to stay in show business until I'm the last one left.
Having a holiday weekend without a family member felt like putting on a sweater that had an extra arm.
My friend is one... who take me for what I am.
No matter what I do, no matter how predictable I try to make my life, it will not be any more predictable than the rest of the world. Which is chaotic.
My head rang like a gong.
Democracy is the recurrent suspicion that more than half of the people are right more than half the time.
The Past is to be respected and acknoledged, but not to be worshiped. It is our future in which we will find our greatness.
O Lord, help me to be pure, but not yet.
If you are out to describe the truth, leave elegance to the tailor.
Art is science made clear.
My pessimism extends to the point of even suspecting the sincerity of the pessimists.
Better by far you should forget and smile than you should remember and be sad.
When you have got an elephant by the hind leg, and he is trying to run away, it's best to let him run.
We are always in search of the redeeming formula, the crystallizing thought.
There is still a difference between something and nothing, but it is purely geometrical and there is nothing behind the geometry.
I love being married. It's so great to find that one special person you want to annoy for the rest of your life.
Censorship, like charity, should begin at home; but, unlike charity, it should end there.
Everybody knows if you are too careful you are so occupied in being careful that you are sure to stumble over something.
I barely had time to register them before those rifles were pointed at me.
There isn?t much better in this life than finding a way to spend a few hours in conversation with people you respect and love. You have to carve this time out of your life because you aren?t really living without it.
Bacchus hath drowned more men than Neptune.
Without the capacity to provide its own information, the mind drifts into randomness.
Prove all things; hold fast that which is good.
To lengthen thy life, lessen thy meals.
I am not sincere, even when I say I am not.
Even the fear of death is nothing compared to the fear of not having lived authentically and fully.
The meeting of two personalities is like the contact of two chemical substances: if there is any reaction, both are transformed.
Reality is nothing but a collective hunch.
A rumor without a leg to stand on will get around some other way.
Absolute faith corrupts as absolutely as absolute power.
A conference is a gathering of important people who singly can do nothing, but together can decide that nothing can be done.
Do something every day that you don't want to do; this is the golden rule for acquiring the habit of doing your duty without pain.
Human beings have an inalienable right to invent themselves.
Self-importance is our greatest enemy. Think about it - what weakens us is feeling offended by the deeds and misdeeds of our fellowmen. Our self-importance requires that we spend most of our lives offended by someone.
Write down the advice of him who loves you, though you like it not at present.
Only some people get what they want. Those are the people who show up to get it.
O, it is excellent to have a giant's strength; but it is tyrannous to use it like a giant.
Have you ever observed that we pay much more attention to a wise passage when it is quoted than when we read it in the original author?
There is always more misery among the lower classes than there is humanity in the higher.
Keep on going and the chances are you will stumble on something, perhaps when you are least expecting it. I have never heard of anyone stumbling on something sitting down.
I like coincidences. They make me wonder about destiny, and whether free will is an illusion or just a matter of perspective. They let me speculate on the idea of some master plan that, from time to time, we're allowed to see out of the corner of our eye.
Refuse to be ill. Never tell people you are ill; never own it to yourself. Illness is one of those things which a man should resist on principle.
Go through your phone book, call people and ask them to drive you to the airport. The ones who will drive you are your true friends. The rest aren't bad people; they're just acquaintances.
Keep cool and you command everybody.
What is the use of a house if you haven't got a tolerable planet to put it on?
I heard them shouting through the muffling canvas of the bag, and then I was being impersonally hauled to my feet by my wrists, my arms wrenched up behind my back, my shoulders screaming.
You have to recognize when the right place and the right time fuse and take advantage of that opportunity. There are plenty of opportunities out there. You can't sit back and wait.
You never know how a horse will pull until you hook him up to a heavy load.
Photographers do this for a living, every single day -- they point their lenses toward every single corner of our world and somehow make the mundane mesmerizing through their artistic eye. It's all a matter of being aware of your surroundings and realizing that there are some really amazing and interesting things to look at, even if it may just be something so simple as a wall being covered up by paint.
But be, as you have been, my happiness...
True friends are those who really know you but love you anyway.
Eat a third and drink a third and leave the remaining third of your stomach empty. Then, when you get angry, there will be sufficient room for your rage.
It's very hard to take yourself too seriously when you look at the world from outer space.
Before we set our hearts too much upon anything, let us examine how happy those are who already possess it.
No one goes there nowadays, it's too crowded.
Experience is that marvelous thing that enables you to recognize a mistake when you make it again.
Americans will put up with anything provided it doesn't block traffic.
There is only one success - to be able to spend your life in your own way.
The faceless, eyeless armed man above me kept his gun very level.
Realize that true happiness lies within you. Waste no time and effort searching for peace and contentment and joy in the world outside. Remember that there is no happiness in having or in getting, but only in giving. Reach out. Share. Smile. Hug. Happiness is a perfume you cannot pour on others without getting a few drops on yourself.
My friend is one... who take me for what I am.
Late to bed and late to wake will keep you long on money and short on mistakes.
If you're trying to take a roomful of people by surprise, it's a lot easier to hit your targets if you don't yell going through the door.
If you think you can win, you can win. Faith is necessary to victory.
Inspiration does exist, but it must find you working.
Lack of money is no obstacle. Lack of an idea is an obstacle.
I like coincidences. They make me wonder about destiny, and whether free will is an illusion or just a matter of perspective. They let me speculate on the idea of some master plan that, from time to time, we're allowed to see out of the corner of our eye.
Three may keep a secret, if two of them are dead.
A billion here, a billion there, pretty soon it adds up to real money.
My mother loved children -- she would have given anything if I had been one.
The more freedom we enjoy, the greater the responsibility we bear, toward others as well as ourselves.
Photographers do this for a living, every single day -- they point their lenses toward every single corner of our world and somehow make the mundane mesmerizing through their artistic eye. It's all a matter of being aware of your surroundings and realizing that there are some really amazing and interesting things to look at, even if it may just be something so simple as a wall being covered up by paint.
No great improvements in the lot of mankind are possible until a great change takes place in the fundamental constitution of their modes of thought.
Act as if it were impossible to fail.
Oh, I don't blame Congress. If I had $600 billion at my disposal, I'd be irresponsible, too.
There ain't no free lunches in this country. And don't go spending your whole life commiserating that you got raw deals. You've got to say, 'I think that if I keep working at this and want it bad enough I can have it.'
Best wide-angle lens? Two steps backward. Look for the 'ah-ha'.
Calamities are of two kinds: misfortunes to ourselves, and good fortune to others.
The human mind treats a new idea the same way the body treats a strange protein; it rejects it.
You can't separate peace from freedom because no one can be at peace unless he has his freedom.
When you make a mistake, don't look back at it long. Take the reason of the thing into your mind and then look forward. Mistakes are lessons of wisdom. The past cannot be changed. The future is yet in your power.
One of the best rules in conversation is, never to say a thing which any of the company can reasonably wish had been left unsaid.
The bitterest tears shed over graves are for words left unsaid and deeds left undone.
Everything happens to everybody sooner or later if there is time enough.
I cried out and my own voice was muffled by the hood.
Set all things in their own peculiar place, and know that order is the greatest grace.
I despise the pleasure of pleasing people that I despise.
Good company and good discourse are the very sinews of virtue.
God is a comedian playing to an audience too afraid to laugh.
The great thing about a computer notebook is that no matter how much you stuff into it, it doesn't get bigger or heavier.
More movement, and the sense of bodies being shackled in alongside of me.
The summer night is like a perfection of thought.
There is an evil tendency underlying all our technology - the tendency to do what is reasonable even when it isn't any good.
When we lose one we love, our bitterest tears are called forth by the memory of hours when we loved not enough.
We are able to laugh when we achieve detachment, if only for a moment.
I am not young enough to know everything.
Do what you feel in your heart to be right - for you'll be criticized anyway. You'll be damned if you do, and damned if you don't.
History is more or less bunk.
The first precept was never to accept a thing as true until I knew it as such without a single doubt.
The happiest is the person who suffers the least pain; the most miserable who enjoys the least pleasure.
If you would be a real seeker after truth, it is necessary that at least once in your life you doubt, as far as possible, all things.
To do anything truly worth doing, I must not stand back shivering and thinking of the cold and danger, but jump in with gusto and scramble through as well as I can.
The man who is swimming against the stream knows the strength of it.
What's the earth With all its art, verse, music, worth - Compared with love, found, gained, and kept?
Nothing in the world can take the place of Persistence. Talent will not; nothing is more common than unsuccessful men with talent. Genius will not; unrewarded genius is almost a proverb. Education will not; the world is full of educated derelicts. Persistence and determination alone are omnipotent. The slogan 'Press On' has solved and always will solve the problems of the human race.
Ordinarily he was insane, but he had lucid moments when he was merely stupid.
The Americans have need of the telephone, but we do not. We have plenty of messenger boys.
Before you do anything, think. If you do something to try and impress someone, to be loved, accepted or even to get someone's attention, stop and think. So many people are busy trying to create an image, they die in the process.
Perhaps, after all, America never has been discovered. I myself would say that it had merely been detected.
Things are only impossible until they're not.
You can tell a lot about a fellow's character by his way of eating jellybeans.
We have too many high sounding words, and too few actions that correspond with them.
Equal opportunity means everyone will have a fair chance at being incompetent.
People were still cramming down the stairs, and more were squeezing past the turnstiles and down the escalators onto the platforms, but it was clear to me that this wasn't going to have a happy ending.
I have a simple philosophy. Fill what's empty. Empty what's full. And scratch where it itches.
When you go into court you are putting your fate into the hands of twelve people who weren't smart enough to get out of jury duty.
The only thing that saves us from the bureaucracy is inefficiency. An efficient bureaucracy is the greatest threat to liberty.
Computer Science is no more about computers than astronomy is about telescopes.
Flattery is like cologne water, to be smelt of, not swallowed.
The first precept was never to accept a thing as true until I knew it as such without a single doubt.
One of the keys to happiness is a bad memory.
Paradise is exactly like where you are right now... only much, much better.
Sorrow was like the wind. It came in gusts.
What we become depends on what we read after all of the professors have finished with us. The greatest university of all is a collection of books.
The creative is the place where no one else has ever been. You have to leave the city of your comfort and go into the wilderness of your intuition. What you'll discover will be wonderful. What you'll discover will be yourself.
Feet, why do I need them if I have wings to fly?
I define comfort as self-acceptance. When we finally learn that self-care begins and ends with ourselves, we no longer demand sustenance and happiness from others.
It felt like they used a baton or something -- it was harder than anyone had ever hit me in the head before.
A rumor without a leg to stand on will get around some other way.
Good judgment comes from experience, and experience comes from bad judgment.
A hypocrite is a person who--but who isn't?
Optimism and hope are our best friends. Let?s reach out and Laugh together at our confounding traits and still, let?s keep in mind that our sympt oms and traits are very real with consequences, never to be underestimated or discounted.
When you encounter difficulties and contradictions, do not try to break them, but bend them with gentleness and time.
The best of us must sometimes eat our words.
One of the best rules in conversation is, never to say a thing which any of the company can reasonably wish had been left unsaid.
Deeds, not words shall speak me.
Maybe the most any of us can expect of ourselves isn't perfection but progress.
It's all right to have butterflies in your stomach. Just get them to fly in formation.
Sometimes you can't see yourself clearly until you see yourself through the eyes of others.
My head rang like a gong.
One of the keys to happiness is a bad memory.
A classic is something that everybody wants to have read and nobody wants to read.
To repeat what others have said, requires education; to challenge it, requires brains.
There is a great deal of difference between an eager man who wants to read a book and the tired man who wants a book to read.
After the last of 16 mounting screws has been removed from an access cover, it will be discovered that the wrong access cover has been removed.
The function of science fiction is not always to predict the future but sometimes to prevent it.
Never rely on the glory of the morning nor the smiles of your mother-in-law.
Nothing takes the taste out of peanut butter quite like unrequited love.
I was pushed roughly but dispassionately onto my stomach and something went twice around my wrists and then tightened up as well, feeling like baling wire and biting cruelly.
It's the soul's duty to be loyal to its own desires. It must abandon itself to its master passion.
I nearly fell again, but new hands grabbed me from in front and dragged me down a steel floor and then forced me to my knees and locked my hands to something behind me.
A mind troubled by doubt cannot focus on the course to victory.
For one human being to love another; that is perhaps the most difficult of all our tasks, the ultimate, the last test and proof, the work for which all other work is but preparation.
Paradise is exactly like where you are right now... only much, much better.
There is still a difference between something and nothing, but it is purely geometrical and there is nothing behind the geometry.
I have often wished I had time to cultivate modesty... But I am too busy thinking about myself.
Innovation has nothing to do with how many R&D dollars you have. When Apple came up with the Mac, IBM was spending at least 100 times more on R&D. It's not about money. It's about the people you have, how you're led, and how much you get it.
Reveal not every secret you have to a friend, for how can you tell but that friend may hereafter become an enemy. And bring not all mischief you are able to upon an enemy, for he may one day become your friend.
The happiest is the person who suffers the least pain; the most miserable who enjoys the least pleasure.
I like an escalator because an escalator can never break, it can only become stairs. There would never be an escalator temporaly out of order sign, only an escalator temporarily stairs. Sorry for the convenience.
The real problem is not whether machines think but whether men do.
Failures are finger posts on the road to achievement.
The first duty of a leader is to make himself be loved without courting love. To be loved without 'playing up' to anyone - even to himself.
I like coincidences. They make me wonder about destiny, and whether free will is an illusion or just a matter of perspective. They let me speculate on the idea of some master plan that, from time to time, we're allowed to see out of the corner of our eye.
Income tax returns are the most imaginative fiction being written today.
With or without religion, you would have good people doing good things and evil people doing evil things. But for good people to do evil things, that takes religion.
Talking with you is sort of the conversational equivalent of an out of body experience.
Give a man a fish and you feed him for a day. Teach a man to fish and you feed him for a lifetime.
Posterity is as likely to be wrong as anyone else.
Men of genius do not excel in any profession because they labor in it, but they labor in it because they excel.
Quotation, n: The act of repeating erroneously the words of another.
Speak properly, and in as few words as you can, but always plainly; for the end of speech is not ostentation, but to be understood.
The fact that an opinion has been widely held is no evidence whatever that it is not utterly absurd; indeed in view of the silliness of the majority of mankind, a widespread belief is more likely to be foolish than sensible.
If there's one thing I know it's God does love a good joke.
Every moment of one's existence one is growing into more or retreating into less.
They are ill discoverers that think there is no land, when they can see nothing but sea.
Under democracy one party always devotes its chief energies to trying to prove that the other party is unfit to rule - and both commonly succeed, and are right.
If the only prayer you ever say in your whole life is "thank you," that would suffice.
You have to recognize when the right place and the right time fuse and take advantage of that opportunity. There are plenty of opportunities out there. You can't sit back and wait.
Vanessa didn't like it, but I figured a cop wasn't going to stop for a kid waving his hat in the street, not that day. They just might stop if they saw Darryl bleeding there, though. I argued briefly with her and Darryl settled it by lurching to his feet and dragging himself down toward Market Street.
I like work: it fascinates me. I can sit and look at it for hours.
How to Raise your I.Q. by Eating Gifted Children
Fall is my favorite season in Los Angeles, watching the birds change color and fall from the trees.
Sorrow was like the wind. It came in gusts.
If we fall, we don't need self-recrimination or blame or anger - we need a reawakening of our intention and a willingness to recommit, to be whole-hearted once again.
Fresh clean sheets are one of life's small joys.
There is always more misery among the lower classes than there is humanity in the higher.
The car rocked back and forth and tipped uphill.
A hypocrite is a person who--but who isn't?
Life is pleasant. Death is peaceful. It's the transition that's troublesome.
The reason why worry kills more people than work is that more people worry than work.
The moment we begin to fear the opinions of others and hesitate to tell the truth that is in us, and from motives of policy are silent when we should speak, the divine floods of light and life no longer flow into our souls.
If God had wanted us to vote, he would have given us candidates.
Inspiration does exist, but it must find you working.
The toughest thing about success is that you've got to keep on being a success. Talent is only a starting point in this business. You've got to keep on working that talent. Someday I'll reach for it and it won't be there.
Part of being creative is learning how to protect your freedom. That includes freedom from avarice.
Refuse to be ill. Never tell people you are ill; never own it to yourself. Illness is one of those things which a man should resist on principle.
I have been through some terrible things in my life, some of which actually happened.
I don't like composers who think. It gets in the way of their plagiarism.
Never make a defense or an apology until you are accused.
There are more tears shed over answered prayers than over unanswered prayers.
Because we don't think about future generations, they will never forget us.
Take a two-mile walk every morning before breakfast.
Nothing is impossible. Some things are just less likely than others.
All great truths begin as blasphemies.
Some editors are failed writers, but so are most writers.
It was a military-looking Jeep, like an armored Hummer, only it didn't have any military insignia on it.
I nearly fell again, but new hands grabbed me from in front and dragged me down a steel floor and then forced me to my knees and locked my hands to something behind me.
A man without ambition is dead. A man with ambition but no love is dead. A man with ambition and love for his blessings here on earth is ever so alive. Having been alive, it won't be so hard in the end to lie down and rest.
Nothing is more conducive to peace of mind than not having any opinions at all.
Nothing is particularly hard if you divide it into small jobs.
There is only one success - to be able to spend your life in your own way.
The reward of a thing well done is to have done it.
Writing gives you the illusion of control, and then you realize it's just an illusion, that people are going to bring their own stuff into it.
Nothing is as simple as we hope it will be.
Never help a child with a task at which he feels he can succeed.
From the moment I picked up your book until I laid it down, I was convulsed with laughter. Some day I intend reading it.
Most folks are about as happy as they make up their minds to be.
Always do right. This will gratify some people and astonish the rest.
The dead might as well try to speak to the living as the old to the young.
The meeting of two personalities is like the contact of two chemical substances: if there is any reaction, both are transformed.
You should not live one way in private, another in public.
The pain of making the necessary sacrifices always hurts more than you think it's going to. I know. It sucks. That being said, doing something seriously creative is one of the most amazing experiences one can have, in this or any other lifetime. If you can pull it off, it's worth it. Even if you don't end up pulling it off, you'll learn many incredible, magical, valuable things. It's NOT doing it when you know you full well you HAD the opportunity- that hurts FAR more than any failure.
I lived what most people call the good life. I was happy, but deep inside I always felt that, with the short amount of time we are given to live and love in this world, we spend too much time loving things instead of people.
As I neared her, I bent to help her up, and was nearly knocked over her.
Get away from the crowd when you can. Keep yourself to yourself, if only for a few hours daily.
Is love supposed to last throughout all time, or is it like trains changing at random stops. If I loved her, how could I leave her? If I felt that way then, how come I don't feel anything now?
The real problem is not whether machines think but whether men do.
The more things a man is ashamed of, the more respectable he is.
It's important to begin a search on a full stomach.
The release of atomic energy has not created a new problem. It has merely made more urgent the necessity of solving an existing one.
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