Afternoon Delight

I'm so Happy today! Guess why. LOL

Well this afternoon has been long and boring. I thought that perhaps someone would call me and make me feel soo much better than I already feel. But nope. It's cool though. I still know he is thinking of me. Well at least I hope that he is, because I know I am thinking of him. Even thopugh I don't want a relationship boy is still plaguing my mind, I feel so much better when I think about Corey.

I went with Carolina to see one of her paintings in the art studio, It was amazing! She is the best artist I've seen in a long time. I love her work. I want her to paint me a picture for my bedroom. Maybe even a mural on my wall. That would be sweet! I love her so much, I am so proud to be her friend. I don't tell her enough how much I truly appreciate her and all she does for me! I wish I knew how to express how much I really do care. Well, I must be going for I have to meet her for dinner. Yes, it's dinner time here, it is about 5:10 pm. L8r G8RS PusA

DRE- I got the smilies to work!!! Thanx buddy!

Monday, Monday!

Well this weekend was something to be remembered for years to come. Even though now I'm grounded til the end of time! I'm sure most of you read it on Carolina's blog but I shall retell the story to.

Friday Night: We went to dinner at Buca Di Beppo's for my dear friend Katie Mac's birthday. We arrived back at the dorms at around 9:15 pm. We changed our clothes and headed over to the Dance. Well there was no one there so we left and went to Garnsey's for a little while. Then we went back to the dance hopping that there would be more people. And there were. The only problem was that me and Carolina and Jess were the only white people there. Which was weird. But we danced for a little bit. Some weird guy came up behind me adn was dancing with me and he unzipped my pants! I almost killed him, I told him to "step off!" or I would cut his balls off. Which worked because he left. Then there was a group of dancers that came in to perform a rutine for us. So as we were watching a dumbass from the crowd decided to grab one of the dancers and security ran over to pull him out of the dance. Well he decided to start throwing punches at anyone who tried to touch him. The whole dance was ruined and like 10 cop cars showed up.

So when we were finally released we went back over to Garnsey's to see my Uncle Steve. Next thing I know my friend Adam's girlfriend runs over to Johnny almost crying and Johnny gets up and runs as fast as he can to the back door of the bar. There was a fight breaking out. It was so scary I thought someone was going to get really hurt. It all ends with Dj beating the shit out of our waitress JEn's now Ex-boyfriend Joe. Apparently Joe had pushed Jen when they were arguing and Adam had started yelling at him because Adam doesn't approve of a man hitting a woman. Then Adam pushed Joe and almost broke the back door of Garnsey's. Dj stepped in to hold Joe back while 5 other guys held Adam back. Finally, Johnny got Adam cooled down and asked Dj to let go of Joe. When Dj stepped back Joe took a swing at him, trying to hit him. Then Dj got really pissed and beat the living shit out of Joe. I misssed it all because the cops were on their way so we had to leave as fast as we could, I was so scared for those guys. But everything turned out okay, no one got arrested and no one got hurt, besides Joe.

Saturday Night: We went to Garnsey's at like 10:30. Kt Mac and the wonderful, amazing, I don't want a relationship right now, boy were there already. They had walked over from a party. He was acting all weird, like being way too nice and flirty. It kind of pissed me off but then I was kinda happy too. Well anyways, they got tired so Jess drove them home. Carolina and I went up to the pool table to see my dear Uncle Steve and play some pool. He told me that he had these guys he wanted us to meet. He said that he had known the one guy since he was born and that he was a good kid. He want us to meet them because they are good guys and we deserve good guys for a change. Well.....

He wasn't lying! They were the sweetest guys I have ever met. Corey is the most amazing guy I've ever set eyes on. He is tall, skinny but muscular, blondish brown hair and the most sparkling eyes I've ever seen. He was so sweet to me and nice. Thoughg he is the reason why I am grounded for ever and a day. I was supposed to be home at 2:30 on Saturday. Yeah, I got home at 5 am. We were at Garnsey's til it closed and then we went to Larsen's and then after that we went back to the other guy's house for some passionate necking. He is by far the best kisser in the world, I mean I've kissed a lot of guys in my time and Corey was the absolute best. He was so tender and gentle. He never pushed anything on me that I didn't want to do. he treated me like a lady, not like a piece of meat, like most of the football players. (Minus, Dj and I dont want a relationship boy.) He asked me if it was okay if he called me, and I was like yeah you better! So I gave him my number thinking that he wouldn't call, he would be just like the rest of em. But oh was I wrong.....

He called me on Sunday evening to tell me how glad he is that he met me and that he had so much fun with me. He said that he can't wait to see me again, even if I am grounded for like ever. He said he will still call me, so we can talk. The only problem with him currently is that he lives two hours away from me, in Kalamazoo Michigan. But I really don't care that much right now. I'm just happy to know that someone amazing is sitting at home right now thinking of me, just as much as I am thinking of him. :)

Finally Friday!

That is a picture of the kind of car I have, the only difference being that mine is purple and DEAD!
Here's the story:

Carolina and I were on our way to my magnificent study hall last night when my car started flashing all these different lights on the dashboard. Then It slowly stop accelerating and as I pulled over to the side of the road it died. :(
So Carolina called my Dad and told him but she really didn't know how to explain to my Dad what I was yelling at her to tell him. So I talked to him. I told him that my car died and he asks me as calmly as calm can be....

Are you serious?
I was like: no Dad I'm just calling and telling you my baby car died for the hell of it!

So he and my mother drove out to pick us up and take me to study hall. I called ahead and told my friend Mike that I would be late because my car had died but I would be there. When I got there I went in and the guy in charge looks at me and says yeah I know I heard. And then goes can I talk to you outside. I was like sure. Then he proceeds to tell me that I won't get any credit for being there because I'm late. I was so pissed, I was like I can't help that my car died!

So now I have to go explain to my coach that I was there but he wouldn't give me credit, even though my fucking car died! I hope she won't be pissed, and maybe she should talk to them abouit cutting people some slack when their car dies.

oh well, life can suck sometimes!

Song-O-the-Day:

HANGING BY A MOMENT
Lifehouse <3

desperate for changing
starving for truth
closer to where I started
chasing after you

I'm falling even more in love with you
letting go of all I've held onto
I'm standing here until you make me move
I'm hanging by a moment here with you

forgetting all I'm lacking
completely incomplete
I'll take your invitation
you take all of me now

I'm falling even more in love with you
letting go of all I've held onto
I'm standing here until you make me move
I'm hanging by a moment here with you

I'm living for the only thing I know
I'm running and not quite sure where to go
and I don't know what I'm diving into
just hanging by a moment here with you

there's nothing else to lose
there's nothing else to find
there's nothing in the world
that could change my mind
there is nothing else
there is nothing else
there is nothing else

desperate for changing
starving for truth
closer to where I started
chasing after you

I'm falling even more in love with you
letting go of all I've held onto
I'm standing here until you make me move
I'm hanging by a moment here with you

I'm living for the only thing I know
I'm running and not quite sure where to go
and I don't know what I'm diving into
just hanging by a moment here with you
just hanging by a moment
hanging by a moment
hanging by a moment
hanging by a moment here with you

Thumb-Twiddling Thursday

PICTURE: Twiddling My Thumbs By: Cynthia J. Duncan Abstract Expressionist Artist.

I thought that this picture was beautiful, so I wanted to share it with y'all.

Well, I finally have some fun and exciting news for yous guys! Well, first of all Today is my dear friend, Katie's Birthday. So me and Jess went to buy her a birthday present yesterday.

But before me and Jessica went we had a little encounter with some weird, ghetto, guys. We were walking to her car, which was parked on the street behind her dorm, when these guys drove by in an old, beat up car. They honked at us and waved. So me being the smartass that I am, waved back. Well, they decided that they had to stop their car and get out and talk to us. They were so nasty and gross looking. One had scraggly gold teeth and the other had an afro the size of europe! It was so scary.
The one guy, with the nasty teeth asked if we would be his friends, because he needs friends that look as good as us, or something like that, and then he asked me for my number. To which I replied I never give out my number (pointed to Jess) she doesn't even have it. And then Jess said Yeah noone can ever get a hold of her. He frowned and said I see how it is and they got in their car a drove off. Me and Jess were so scared, but then we started laughing so hard that I had to call Carolina and tell her. She was laughing so hard it was hilarious. Then she started yelling at me and was like, Why does all the fun stuff happen when I'm not there?! Which I found hilarious.


Katie is the most innocent and shy person you can imagine, so we got her dirty little gifts from Spencer's. We got her lubricant that is fruity tasting and smells good, we got her flavored condoms, four shot glasses, a huge candle that is the number 69, and some other crazy bath toys.

Then we went to this little jewelery shop to see if we could also get her something nice, like a necklace or earrings. But instead I just got my ear pierced for the sixth time. It was so spontaneous and funny. Carolina was like, Why do you always do the crazy shit when I'm not with you?! (lol that seems to be a trend). So I told her I would take her to get her ears pierced on Saturday. Then when we have Spring Break in two weeks we are going to get our tattoos, finally!!!!!

But then the fun came to a halt when I got home last night only to find out that my friend Kelly's Father had passed away. I broke down, I didn't know him that well but I was really good friends with Kelly all throughout high school. I felt so bad because I know how much she must be hurting right now. I can't imagine losing my daddy. ::please keep her in your prayers, if you pray::

~*BaCK To HaPPy TiMeS*~
Carolina and I have been in such good moods lately I cannot wait to carry it on into the weekend! We are going to dance the night away on Friday and then on Saturday we are going to relax and hang out at Garnsey's with Johnny and Steve. YAY!

HERE"S the SONG of the DAY:
Wicked Game
<3 HIM <3

The world was on fire and no one could save me but you.
It's strange what desire will make foolish people do.
I never dreamed that I'd meet somebody like you.
I never dreamed that I'd love somebody like you.

I don't want to fall in love. (This world is only gonna break your heart)
I don't want to fall in love. (This world is only gonna break your heart)
With you. With you. (This world is only gonna break your heart)

What a wicked game to play, to make me feel this way.
What a wicked thing to do, to let me dream of you.
What a wicked thing to say, you never felt this way.
What a wicked thing to do, to make me dream of you and,

I don't want to fall in love. (This world is only gonna break your heart)
I don't want to fall in love. (This world is only gonna break your heart)
With you.

The world was on fire and no one could save me but you.
It's strange what desire will make foolish people do.
I never dreamed that I'd love somebody like you.
I never dreamed that I'd loose somebody like you no,

I don't want to fall in love. (This world is only gonna break your heart)
I don't want to fall in love. (This world is only gonna break your heart)
With you. With you. (This world is only gonna break your heart)
Nobody loves no one.



This is going to be my new tattoo! Later :p
PusA <3

~*Wacky Wednesday*~

Hey y'all it's Wednesday. But it's cool I have no volleyball practice today! And I don't have to work! That's a first in weeks, eh? I'm so happy today. I have no idea why either. This week has been so much fun and just MAGICAL as Carolina says. ::hehe::
I get to go for my CAT scan on my foot tonight I can't wait. I certainly hope that nothing is broken, because then I'll cry. And I hate crying.
OMG!! My father went off on me yesterday because I didn't ask him if I could go to Croatia, I just told him I was going. I was like whatever I'm paying for it myself anyways, you don't need to worry. And he was like good because I wouldn't give you money anyway! And then there's my wonderful mommy standing behind him shaking her head mouthing Don't worry sweetie Mommy will give you some money. :p I love my mommy! Things have been so much better between her and me. We don't fight at all. I think it's been a couple months now, maybe three. I think that it's because I'm gone so much that when we see each other it's easier to not get on the other's nerves. Which is awesome!
I can't think of anything fun and exciting to tel yous guys. That seems to be a trend latley. I'm sure I told you that me and Carolina are going dancing on Friday didn't I? Well, I shall tell you again! It is going to kick ass!!! We are going to dance the night away!! Perhaps the wonderful, amazing, I don't want a relationship right now, boy will come. That would be nice. But if he doesn't i won't cry. (that much) :::just kidding:::
I'm beginning not to care anymore. I mean I still care for him a lot but I don't feel the need to get upset about him not calling or not wanting hang out. It doesn't bother me that much anymore. I'm glad. I don't need his shit now do I? NO, I DON'T!!!!!Even Though it is pretty hard, I shall be strong.


SONG OF THE DAY:
~*The RoSe*~

Bette Midler<3

Some say love, it is a river
that drowns the tender reed.
Some say love, it is a razor
that leaves your soul to bleed.
Some say love, it is a hunger,
an endless aching need.
I say love, it is a flower,
and you its only seed.

It's the heart afraid of breaking
that never learns to dance.
It's the dream afraid of waking
that never takes the chance.
It's the one who won't be taken,
who cannot seem to give,
and the soul afraid of dyin'
that never learns to live.

When the night has been too lonely
and the road has been to long,
and you think that love is only
for the lucky and the strong,
just remember in the winter
far beneath the bitter snows
lies the seed that with the sun's love
in the spring becomes the rose



WELL, THAT'S ALL FOLKS!
PusA <3

Ruby Tuesday!

Hey y'all, sorry my picture didn't come out. It really is a totally awesome tattoo. When I get it I will take a picture of it so you all can see. It is so cool I can't wait to get it!!!
So anyways, today is Tuesday, blah! I have no fun and exciting news, yet again. I'm just bored sitting at work, waiting to get off so I can go to my other job. YAY! ::sarcasm:: I'm tired too, I think I need to eat more or atke some better vitamins or something. I dno. Whatever.
I keep dreaming about Croatia. I can't hardly wait to go! Carolina and I talk about it so much I'm going crazy trying to invision it. So i found myself some cool ass pictures!









Well, these are only a few of the pictures I found, I didn't want to bore you guys with pictures of places I'm sure most of you have seen.

This song is brought to you by the letter 'Q':


QueeN- Another One Bites the Dust

Ooh, let's go
Steve walks warily down the street
With the brim pulled way down low
Ain't no sound but the sound of his feet
Machine guns ready to go

Are you ready, hey, are you ready for this
Are you hangin' on the edge of your seat
Out of the doorway the bullets rip
To the sound of the beat - yeah

Another one bites the dust
Another one bites the dust
And another one gone and another one gone
Another one bites the dust, eh
Hey, I'm gonna get you too
Another one bites the dust

How do you think I'm going to get along
Without you when you're gone
You took me for everything that I had
And kicked me out on my own

Are you happy ? Are you satisfied ?
How long can you stand the heat
Out of the doorway the bullets rip
To the sound of the beat
Look out

Another one bites the dust
Another one bites the dust
And another one gone and another one gone
Another one bites the dust, eh
Hey, I'm gonna get you too
Another one bites the dust

Hey
Oh take it
Bites the dust - bite the dust hey
Hey
Another one bites the dust
Another one bites the dust, ow
Another one bites the dust, hey hey
Another one bites the dust, heeey
Ooh show down

There are plenty of ways that you can hurt a man
And bring him to the ground
You can beat him
You can cheat him
You can treat him bad and leave him
When he's down, yeah
But I'm ready, yes I'm ready for you
I'm standing on my own two feet
Out of the doorway the bullets rip
Repeating to the sound of the beat
Oh yeah

Another one bites the dust
Another one bites the dust
And another one gone and another one gone
Another one bites the dust, yeah
Hey, I'm gonna get you too
Another one bites the dust
Shoot out
Hey, alright

This is going to be my new tattoo!!!

I shall put it on my shoulders, I think it is perfect. What do you guys think??

Rainy Days and Mondays Always Get Me Down

Hey y'all. Well it's Monday and it's raining yet again. But it's okay, I'm feeling much, much better today, and I'm in an extraordinarily GOOD mood!! I don't know why either. I'm so tired that I can barely keep my eyes open, but I feel great. Carolina and I went to church last night. It was wonderful. I always feel so much better after I go to church. Perhaps that is why I am in such a good mood this morning. I don't know, but oh well.
You guys would be so proud of me. We went out to Garnsey's on Saturday night, and I didn't touch a drop of alcohol. Well, I did have one sip of a beer and It made me so sick I couldn't finish it. I'm so proud of myself, I can't believe I actually said no and didn't give in this time!
I have no new and exciting things to tell you guys. This weekend was pretty tame, minus my stunning digestive pyrotechnics on Friday night. I'm glad that I didn't drink on Saturday. Oh, I talked to that one guy, DJ, that took care of me on Friday. He told me that he was really scared and worried about me. And then he told me that he hopes I'd do the same for him, to which I responded, yes. He didn't seem to be too happy with me, for my actions you know, but he did however, seem very happy to see me not dead and not drinking.

The song of the day has been brought to you by the letter 'G':
STRAIGHT OUT OF LINE-
GODSMACK <3

THERE’S NO REASON, THERE’S NO COMPRAMISE
CHANGING SEASONS, LIVING THE HIGH LIFE
I DON’T KNOW YOU, SO DON’T FREAK ON ME
I CAN’T CONTROL YOU, YOU’RE NOT MY DESTINY

STRAIGHT OUT OF LINE
I CAN’T FIND A REASON WHY I SHOULD JUSTIFY MY WAYS
STRAIGHT OUT OF LINE
I DON’T NEED A REASON
YOU DON’T NEED TO

I’LL CONFESS THIS, YOU’RE MY TRAGEDY
I’VE LAID YOU TO REST JUST AS FAST AS YOU’VE TURNED ON ME
GONE FOREVER, BANISH THE MEMORIES, DISPLAYS OF PLEASURE ARE MASKED BY YOUR MISERY

~*Weathered*~

~*DREAMS- Edgar Allan Poe*~

In visions of the dark night
I have dreamed of joy departed-
But a waking dream of life and light
Hath left me broken-hearted.

Ah! what is not a dream by day
To him whose eyes are cast
On things around him with a ray
Turned back upon the past?

That holy dream- that holy dream,
While all the world were chiding,
Hath cheered me as a lovely beam
A lonely spirit guiding.

What though that light, thro' storm and night,
So trembled from afar-
What could there be more purely bright
In Truth's day-star?
This is truly a beautiful poem! I love Edgar Allan Poe <3

OK, so last night really sucked ass for all I can remember. I was so fucking drunk that I passed out at the football house. I have now decided that I am not drinking anymore.
I felt like shit, I looked like shit, and I didn't get to makeout with one of the hottest guys at St. Francis because he was too busy holding my hair back as I puked everywhere.
He took care of me which was nice, He stayed by my side all night until Carolina and Jess took me home. I passed out at least three times before I went to sleep.
I can't believe that I let myself get that bad. I don't ever want to drink like that again.
But I'm so fucking stupid because I say that all of the time and I always end up drinking that much or more all the time. I think I'm turning into an alcoholic. I need to stop. I feel like a pile of shit that's been stepped in like a million times today. I just want to die.
Carolina really doesn't want to go out tonight, but I'd like to go play a little pool and then come home at like 1:30 instead of 3 am.
Maybe, then I can talk to DJ (the hottest guy at St. Francis.) and I can apologize for my behavior. I had like fifty million messages on my phone from a bunch of my friends asking me if I was okay and telling me to come out and party with them tonight.
Which is kind of contradictory but you know, all my friends, well, almost all are alcoholics themselves. I think I might go and get some dinner with Carolina and the play a little pool and then come home and sleep. And then Sunday I will go to church. I need God really bad right now.And I know that its lent and I should be going to church every Sunday, which I don't anymore. Sadly.
I am so stressed, I guess that's why I feel the need to drink so much all of the time. And that is no way to relieve stress, because now I am only more stressed out because I feel like shit.

oh well.

This song is brought to you by the letter 'C':

Weathered-Creed <3
I lie awake on a long, dark night
I can’t seem to tame my mind
Slings and arrows are killing me inside
Maybe I can’t accept the life that’s mine
No I can’t accept the life that’s mine

Simple living is my desperate cry
Been trading love with indifference
yeah it suits me just fine
I try to hold on but I’m calloused to the bone
Maybe that’s why I feel alone
Maybe that’s why I feel so alone

Me…I’m rusted and weathered
Barely holding together
I’m covered with skin that peels and
it just won’t heal

The sun shines and I can’t avoid the light
I think I’m holding on to life too tight
Ashes to ashes and dust to dust
Sometimes I feel like giving up
Sometimes I feel like giving up

Me…I’m rusted and weathered
Barely holding together
I’m covered with skin that peels
and it just won’t heal

The day reminds me of you
The night hides your truth
The earth is a voice
Speaking to you
Take all this pride
And leave it behind
Because one day it ends
One day we die
Believe what you will
That is your right
But I choose to win
So I choose to fight
To fight

What do you guys think???

Hey people, it's finally Friday! I'm so excited. I can't wait to go out tonight and have a wonderful time with my beautiful friends. I talked to the wonderful, amazing, I don't want a relationship, boy this morning. We had breakfast together. Carolina thinks my little story is romantic, well let me tell you and see what you think:

Well, what do you think? Is it romantic or just plain cute? Do you think he has an alterior motive or just misses me for real? Should I get my hopes up?? Or no?

Back to better days.....
It's Friday!!!! Oh yeah I am so happy the week is over, well almost anyways. I have two classes today and then I work until 9:30 tonight, and after that I am going out on the town! Carolina and I are going to stay with Jessica tonight so that we can stay out even later than usual.I am so excited for that and plus Carolina and I are going shopping on Saturday!!! I love shopping! Oh yeah! I can't wait to get some new tops and a couple new pairs of pants, which I desperately need. I can't wait. LOL I can hardly wait for anything these days it seems. I'm so impatient. But oh well, so I bet you guys want to know what the song of the days is!

This song was brought to you by the letters 'S' and 'H':

Sister Hazel- Your Winter <3

The grey ceiling on the earth
Well it's lasted for a while
Take my thoughts for what they're worth
I've been acting like a child
In your opinion, and what is that?
It's just a different point of view

What else can I do?
I said I'm sorry, yeah I'm sorry.
I said I'm sorry , but for?
If I hurt you then I hate myself
Don't want to hate myself, don't want to hurt you
Why do you chew your pain?
If you only know how much I love you, love you

Chorus
I won't be your winter
I won't be anyone's excuse to cry
We can be forgiven
I will be here

The old picture on the shelf
Well it's been there for a while
A frozen image of ourselves
We are acting like a child
Innocent and in a trance
A dance that lasted for a while

You read my eyes just like your diary,
oh remember, please remember
Well, I'm not a beggar, but what's more
If I hurt you, then I hate myself, don't wanna hurt you
Why do you chew your pain?
If you only knew how much I love you

I won't be your winter
I won't be anyone's excuse to cry
We can be forgiven
I will be here



Well, I hope you enjoy!!!
PusA <3

Ditchin' Study Hall

Study hall fucking sux ass! I'm sitting here trying to find a way to get outta this place. I'm so tired I just want to sleep. I found my favorite poem of all time and I want to share it with you. It reminds me exactly to the very last line of the wonderful, amazing, I don't want a relationship right now, boy.
Here it is:

I hate the way you talk to me,
and the way you cut your hair.
I hate the way you drive my car,
I hate it when you stare.
I hate your big dumb combat boots
and the way you read my mind.
I hate you so much it makes me sick,
it even makes me rhyme.
I hate the way you’re always right,
I hate it when you lie.
I hate it when you make me laugh,
even worse when you make me cry.
I hate it when you’re not around,
and the fact that you didn’t call.
But mostly I hate the way I don’t hate you,
not even close…
not even a little bit…
not even at all.

It is from the movie 10 Things I Hate About You. I love that movie and reading this poem made me think of my wonderful, amazing, I don't want a relationship right now, boy. But I shall not cry for him, I have no need too. I wish I'd saved all my tears he made me cry so I could Fucking drown him in them!!!




Back to happier times...

LOL, Carolina and I had an interesting discussion about toliets today at dinner. I was telling her about this crazy picture I saw of a cat in one of the shower stalls in the dorms. She then went on to tell me that there are tons of things like that in Croatia on bathroom stall doors. I was like really that's cool. And then somehow we started talking about how distracting it is to have those things there bacause it makes it harder for you to concentrate on what you originally came into the bathroom to do. Which is true. We were laughing for a good ten minutes about it! It was a totally serious conversation but it was hilarious at the same time. I love my conversations with her. We have so much fun being as crazy as we are. I love her, I love having a sister!!!!
Well, I guess I should be going. Though I have nothing else to do.

What Can I Say? It's Thursday!

Hola y'all! Well today is Thursday and nothing fun and exciting has happened. I went to work out this morning and I had class at about 11 0'clock. now I'm at work, not doing anything because I can't even walk straight right now my foot hurts that bad. I'm bored out of my mind and I can't think of anything to talk about. I wish I could just go to sleep right now and never wake up, I know I probably sound suicidal or something but that's not what I mean. I mean that I need sleep so desperately that I could sleep for weeks even months and still be tired. I just need a break from everything. By everything I mean, family, friends, BOYS, work, school, etc. I just want this semester to be over so I can get on an airplane and sleep for 13 hours and wake up in Croatia with Carolina. I can't wait to lay on the beach all day and party all night long for one whole month!!!!! I wish I could go there right now!


Well anyways, what can I say? It's Thursday, the most boring day of the week because it's not Monday so I can't be pissed that I still have a whole week ahead of me and it's not Friday so I can't be happy that the week is over. It's just Thursday. BLAH! Oh well I kno I shall survive, I always do.

Here's the song of the day:
This song does not mean that I am over the wonderful, amazing, I don't want a relationship right now, boy. It is just one of my favorite songs by her, though it does make me rethink some of my past relationships.

"He Wasn't"
Avril Lavigne <3

There's not much going on today.
I'm really bored, it's getting late.
What happened to my Saturday?
Monday's coming, the day I hate.

Sit on the bed alone, staring at the phone.
He wasn't what I wanted, what I thought, no.
He wouldn't even open up the door.
He never made me feel like I was special.
He isn't really what I'm looking for.

This is when I start to bite my nails.
And clean my room when all else fails.
I think it's time for me to bail.
This point of view is getting stale.

Sit on the bed alone, staring at the phone.
He wasn't what I wanted, what I thought, no.
He wouldn't even open up the door.
He never made me feel like I was special.
He isn't really what I'm looking for.

Na na na na na, we've all got choices.
Na na na na, we've all got voices.
Na na na na na, stand up make some noise.
Na na na na, stand up make some noise.

Sit on the bed alone, staring at the phone.
He wasn't what I wanted, what I thought, no.
He wouldn't even open up the door.
He never made me feel like I was special.
He isn't really what I'm looking for.
He wasn't what I wanted, what I thought, no.
He wouldn't even open up the door.
He never made me feel like I was special.
Like I was special, cuz I was special.

Na na na na na.

Wednesday Adams

BEAUTIFUL MAN!!!!
Hey y'all whats happenin??? Nothing quite wonderful here. I talked to the wonderful, amazing, I don't want a relationship right now, boy this morning. He was extremely nice. He is growing his little go-t (is that how you spell it?) back and it looks so HOT on him!! He said that he was worried about me because he hasn't seen me in a few days. I was like okay, weirdo, why were you worried? And he told me it was because of my foot. He was worried that it might be really bad. He told me that he wanted to call me but he figured I wouldn't want to talk to him, considering I ignore him whenever I see him. I was like, I don't ignore you, I'm just not giving you all the attention I did before. He was like yeah I know, but I was still worried about you and I miss you. I told him I missed him too and then I told him I had to go. So I left and came over here to the library so I could tell you wonderful, amazing, I want to know everything, people about it! I do miss him a lot, but I will never let him know how much. Alrighty, back to happier things! Carolina was in our local news paper!!!! They did a huge article on her and how awesome she is! I'm so proud of her!!!!!!! Well, I must be going I have homework to do.

PusA

Here's the song of the day:

"Grace Of God Go I"
Flogging Molly<3

Lookin' down through a tide of no return
Is a field where the crops no longer grow
Parched is the land, strangled an' be damned
There for the Grace Of God Go I

Down beside where the riverbed sleeps
Is a man not knowin' what he should feel
Mocked by the wave that beats the waters edge
There for the Grace Of God Go I

If I ever hurt another like thee again
I would drown myself beneath your name
Lost was the child, we all once did hide
There for the Grace Of God Go I

Rain Rain Go Away!

SOOOOOO true! Well I have had the longest day in the history of man! It is the nastiest, rainiest day of the year today. And its freezing! I had a wonderful Valentine's Day with my bestest friends in the hwole wide world! Me, Carolina, Jess, and Anna went to Garnsey's to play pool with Johnny the owner. He taught us how to shoot some pretty hard shots and make them look easy. We had so much fun playing pool with him! He even bought us a round of shots for Valentine's Day. I love that bar! Well, I haven't seen the wonderful, amazing, I don't want a relatioship right now, boy at all today. I'm glad because it hurts too much to see him. I just want to hold him and never let him go. But I won't give in first! I love him more than anything in this world (except for Carolina and Jess) and I can't stand not being around him. But I will not tell him that. He must grow a pair of balls and come to me. Right? Right! Well anyways, I've had so much on my mind today. It's like anything you can possibly think of I have thought of today. I have a problem or something. I was just sitting in the lounge at school today staring into space. And then I fell asleep. HAHA I almost missed my class. But it's cool, I hate that class anyways I shouldn't have even gone to it. Oh well, I'm so tired right now I don't even care.

Okay here's the song of the day:
In the End- Greenday



All brawns and no brains
And all those nice things
And you finally got what you want
Someone to look good with
And light your cigarette
Is this what you really want

I've figured out
What you're all about
And I don't think I like what I see
So I hope I won't be there
In the end if you come around

How long will he last
Before he's a creep in the past
And you're all alone once again
Will you pop up again
And be my special friend
Til the end and when will that be

I've figured out
What you're all about
And I don't think I like what I see
So I hope I won't be there
In the end if you come around

(hey)

I've figured out
What you're all about
And I don't think I like what I see
So I hope I won't be there
In the end if you come around

Valentine's Day!

Well today is Valentine's Day. Obviously. It sucks ass, no one special has given me anything special. Carolina is in such a sarcastic happy mood today it's so funny. I decided to wear all black today. Which is scaring a few people, but whatever, I have nothing to be all gooshy and happy about. I haven't seen the wonderful, amazing, I don't want a relationship right now, boy at all today. Sadly, but I've decided that I am NOT going to call him. He can call me! I finally got to the doctor today for my foot. I have torn ligaments in my foot and they aren;t sure if it is broken or not yet. But it's cool I have a boot the size of Texas on. We had the best weekend ever! First my team that I coach got first place in the tournament they were in. I'm so proud of them!!!!! And then we went to Garnsey's, which was soooo much fun. We played pool so well this weekend! I accidentally drank too much on Friday night and made out with my friend Matt. OOOOOPPPSSS! I definately didn't want to do that. I feel so bad now, but when I saw him on Saturday we talked about it and I explained to him that I am in love with someone else and that its nothing against him but that won't happen again. He then told me that it was cool because he was going to tell me the same thing. So I had a ton-o-fun on Friday with no attachments, YAY YAY YAY YAY YAY!!!!!

Well, I guess I should give you guys the song of the day:
Margaritaville
Jimmy Buffet <3

Nibblin' on sponge cake,
watchin' the sun bake;
All of those tourists covered with oil.
Strummin' my six string on my front porch swing.
Smell those shrimp--
They're beginnin' to boil.

Wasted away again in Margaritaville,
Searchin' for my lost shaker of salt.
Some people claim that there's a woman to blame,
But I know it's nobody's fault.

Don't know the reason,
Stayed here all season
With nothing to show but this brand new tatoo.
But it's a real beauty,
A Mexican cutie, how it got here
I haven't a clue.

Wasted away again in Margaritaville,
Searchin' for my lost shaker of salt.
Some people claim that there's a woman to blame,
Now I think,-- hell it could be my fault.

I blew out my flip flop,
Stepped on a pop top;
Cut my heel, had to cruise on back home.
But there's booze in the blender,
And soon it will render
That frozen concoction that helps me hang on.

Wasted away again in Margaritaville
Searchin' for my lost shaker of salt.
Some people claim that there's a woman to blame,
But I know, it's my own damn fault.
Yes, and some people claim that there's a woman to blame, And I know it's my own damn fault.

Friday!

Oh what a wonderful day!!!! NOT!



I'm so tired today, and I'm ready to cry because my foot hurts soooo bad! I can't even work, I have to just sit here and do nothing. So I write, to you wonderful people, I write. Last night was long. I went to study hall and had no homework so I sat there for an hour and a half doing nothing. Then I went to a poetry reading. That was fun. I read four of my poems all of which I wrote about the wonderful, amazing, I don't want a relationship right now, boy. He came in when I read my last poem. He was like wow thats awesome, you obviously wrote that about someone. And I said yeah I did. Then he looked at me with a grin and asked, WHO? So I told him... Think about it.

Here's the poem:
One More Time
8-18-04 (The week I met him.)

Smile at me one more time and I'm gonna melt.
Your eyes are full of light and a warmth I've never felt.
Smile at me one more time and I'm gonna die.
Talking with you was hard because I'm so shy.
Smile at me one more time and I'm gonna flip my lid.
I can't stand not knowing you better, I hoped you'd talk to me more, and you did.
Smile at me one more time and...
I don't know
But please, smile at me one more time.

After I that he read one of my favorite poems by Edgar Allan Poe, AnnaBell Lee. It was weird, he just so happened to pick the one poem that I absolutely adore. He seems to do that a lot. And when I was leaving I told him that that was my favorite poem and he was like, yeah I figured you would like that one. I just picked it up off the top of the pile and read it though. So I was like crazyness, I have to go I'll talk to you later. And I went to walk away with my friend Jess. He stopped me and was like hey, I'll see you tomorrow, right? I almost melted, he asked it in such a way as if I was not going to see him at all today and not talk to him, he was almost sad. I was like of course ;) Then I gave him one of the roses I had recieved for reading one of my poems. And I left. I saw him this morning and he gave me a hug and said thanks for the flower. And made me promise to call him today so we can hang out! Yeah we are 'normal' friends again. I'm excited the weirdness is gone!! He was acting so weird around me, like he couldn't look me in the eyes or touch me because I would get mad or something. But this morning, when I talked to him and he gave me that hug, everything felt like the way it was before all the shit happened.

Okay well anyways, back to last night. Tuesday was my brother's friend Eric's 23rd birthday. So last night we surprised him with a huge cake and party at my house. When they had finished cutting the cake my his friend Ryan grabbed a piece and shuoved it right into my brother's face and hair. It was hilarious. My brother screamed like a little girl. Now imagine this, a 22 year old man with shoulder length curly hair, getting cake in the face and then screaming like a little girl. HILARIOUS!!!
I almost peed my pants! The old boy was there last night too. (Markus) He kept staring at me so I was like hey what are you staring at? And he was like nothing. And I was like are we cool? And he was like yeah. Then I said good cuz you're a loser! And he was like no you're a loser! SO I'm happy, we are friends again. Even though he stares at me like he is going to cry or his heart is breaking. I'm glad we are friends, he is too awesome of a person not to be friends with him. So yay, we are friends!

I'm excited because we are going out tonight! My team has a tournament tomorrow but I'm still going to go play pool and hang out with the wonderful, amazing, I don't want a relationship, boy. It will be fun, I can't wait to hang out and be normal again. I love when things start to fall into place and I've done nothing to cause it, it just happens. I am so happy right now!!! SO heres the song of the day:

Wish That I Was There
Hanson

The sun has fallen
Another day gone without you
My heart keeps calling
And I don't know just what to do
When you're near me
I seem to forget my lonely days
It's more than a feeling
It's something that can't be explained

chorus
I wish that I was there
I wish that I was there
When you're not here
I wish that I was there
I wish that I was there
I wish that I was there
When you're not here
I wish that I was there

You were falling
Now I'm coming 'round again
I was calling
'Cause without you it's the end

I just want to see you a little more
I just want to dream of some more
I just want to see you a little more
I just want to be with you some more
I wish that I was there
I wish that I was there
When you're not here
I wish that I was there

And you make me feel
Won't you take me when you're not here
It's been raining here
And I just want you to be near

I just want to see you a little more
I just want to dream of you some more
I just want to see you a little more
I just want to be with you some more

I wish that I was there
I wish that I was there
When you're not here
I wish that I was there
I wish that I was there
I wish that I was there
When you're not here
I'm wish that I was there

I wish that I was there
(And you make me feel)
I wish that I was there
When you're not here
(Won't you take me when you're not here.)
I wish that I was there
I wish that I was there
(It's been raining here)
I wish that I was there
When you're not here
(And I just want you to be near)
I'm wish that I was there

I wish that I was there
I wish that I was there
When you're not here
I wish that I was there

Holy Cow!

I have found the greatest site ever! You must go there and get these crazy icons and pictures!!
It is www.pinkpanther281.tripod.com/id11.html

Thursday!!

Yeah today is Thursday! I'm so pissed. I finally went to get the x-rays on my foot. And they told me that they would send them to my doctor and I would find out what is wrong when he sees them. They did not however, give me anything for my foot! They didn't wrap it, put a cast on it, or even give me crutches! Which I need badly might I say! I can barely walk on my damn foot anymore! It is so painful. Practice blew ass yesterday, and I couldn't even play racketball this morning. Oh well!

I miss the boy sooooo much too. I just want to tell him that we should go back to the way things were. I miss the way he used to hold me and the way he would smile at me when I would walk in the room. I miss his sweet voice and the way he would run his fingers through my hair. I miss him. I miss how good he smells and how warm his touch felt. I miss everything. I want to hug him and hold onto him forever and never let him go!!! Maybe I should call him right now and be like, come out and give me a hug, I really need one!

I'm so tired! I can't wait to go home and go to sleep! Because I'm tired and I wanna go to bed!!!! (LOL) Okay I guess I should pick a song of the day.

Here you go:

ONE WEEK_ BARE NAKED LADIES


It’s been one week since you looked at me
Cocked your head to the side
and said I’m angry
Five days since you laughed at me saying
Get that together come back and see me
Three days since the living room,
I realized it’s all my fault, but couldn’t tell you
Yesterday you’d forgiven me
But it’ll still be two days till I say I’m sorry

Hold it now and watch the hoodwink
As I make you stop, think
You’ll think you’re looking at Aquaman
I summon fish to the dish,
Although I like the Chalet Swiss
I like the sushi
‘Cause it’s never touched a frying pan

Hot like wasabe when I bust rhymes
Big like Leann Rimes
Because I’m all about value
Bert Kaempfert’s got the mad hits
You try to match wits
You try to hold me but I bust through

Gonna make a break and take a fake
I’d like a stinkin, achin shake
I like vanilla, It’s the finest of the flavors
Gotta see the show,
Cause then you’ll know
The Vertigo is gonna grow
Cause it’s so dangerous,
You’ll have to sign a waiver

How can I help it if I think you’re funny when you’re mad
Trying hard not to smile though I feel bad
I’m the kind of guy who laughs at a funeral
Can’t understand what I mean?
Well, you soon will
I have a tendency to wear my mind on my sleeve
I have a history of taking off my shirt

It’s been one week since you looked at me
Threw your arms in the air and said you’re crazy
Five days since you tackled me
I’ve still got the rug burns on both my knees
It’s been three days since the afternoon
You realized it’s not my fault not a moment too soon
Yesterday you’d forgiven me
And now I sit back and wait till you say you’re sorry

Chickity China the Chinese chicken
You have a drumstick and your brain stops tickin’
Watchin X-Files with no lights on,
We’re dans la maison
I hope the Smoking Man’s in this one
Like Harrison Ford I’m getting Frantic
Like Sting I’m Tantric
Like Snickers, guaranteed to satisfy

Like Kurosawa I make mad films
Okay I don’t make films
But if I did they’d have a samurai
Gonna get a set of better clubs
Gonna find the kind with tiny nubs
Just so my irons aren’t always flying off the backswing
Gotta get in tune with Sailor Moon
Cause that cartoon has got the boom anime babes
That make me think the wrong thing

How can I help it if I think you’re funny when you’re mad
Trying hard not to smile though I feel bad
I’m the kind of guy who laughs at a funeral
Can’t understand what I mean?
You soon will
I have a tendency to wear my mind on my sleeve
I have a history of losing my shirt

It’s been one week since you looked at me
Dropped your arms to your sides and said I’m sorry
Five days since I laughed at you and said
You just did just what I thought you were gonna do
Three days since the living room
We realized we’re both to blame, but what could we do?
Yesterday you just smiled at me
Cause it’ll still be two days till we say we’re sorry

It’ll still be two days till we say we’re sorry
It’ll still be two days till we say we’re sorry
Birchmount Stadium, home of the Robbie

Wednesday night

Hey y'all its finally night fall! I am almost ready to pass out I'm so tired!! But you know me I can't complain. Today was very long and I don't think it will ever end! I am at studyhall right now. Which sucks because I have no homework to do and I still have to be here! I'm going to go play some pool with Carolina in a bit. But first I need to go to the writing lab and get help on researching for my I-search term paper for my writing class. Practice was fun today. Its kinda weird though because we have four seniors that just left and so now we are practicing without them. It feels so not right! I miss them. My foot is in so much pain right now too. I can't wait to go to the doctor and get some vicodin!!!!!! I want you guys to see my wonderful boy so I'm going to put up his picture. I hope you guys enjoy, oh and tell me what you think! It is his football picture, but he is really cute!!!! I promise!

Wednesday: AKA Hump Day!

Well people it's Wednesday already. I am so tired, I just finished working out and I got to see the 'wonderful' boy this morning. He looked really sad, but I can't help it if he is sad because he brought it on himself. I mean I do really care for him and I know we will get together eventually, but right now I feel like dying everytime I see him. As I said yesterday that he wasn't going to go out with us.... I was right, he stayed home and tuned his violin instead.My cousin, Steve, came out with us last night and he had recently met my boy on Saturday, so when he asked where he was I told my cuz what happened. And he told me that I didn't need to worry, because he saw the way he looked at me and how much he wanted to be around me and there was no way in hell that we weren't going to be together. And then he told that boys were bad and his little, baby cousin doesn't need to talk to them. I love my cousin! But whatever, he is going to hang out with us this weekend, so I'm satisfied. Last night was a blast besides! I played pool like I've never played pool in my life. It was sooooo AWESOME! I love pool. And a cute boy tried to makeout with me, or rather did makeout with me! Which was fun but now I feel bad. I always do stupid things and fuck sh-tuff up! I hate that. Oh well, I'm just so tired right now that I can barely type. I wish that this day was over already, but alas it has just begun, well for me anyways it's like the middle of the afternoon for you guys. I have volleyball practice today for the first time since November. That's going to suck! But oh well, and then I don't even get to go home because I have to go to study hall because my coach thinks that my grades aren't good enough so she wants someone to sit and watch me do my homework. But it does kind of help to get an extra push, especially on days when I feel as shity as I do today. My back is hurting from I don't know what, and I believe I broke my foot playing racket ball, but I can't go to the doctor until next Monday. So I get to gimp around and pretend like nothing is wrong so my coach doesn't flip. Oh well, if the world didn't SUCK we would all fall off, am I right?

here's the song of the day:


Garth Brooks- Friends in Low Places

Blame it all on my roots
I showed up in boots
And ruined your black tie affair
The last one to know
The last one to show
I was the last one
You thought you'd see there
And I saw the surprise
And the fear in his eyes
When I took his glass of champagne
And I toasted you
Said, honey, we may be through
But you'll never hear me complain

'Cause I've got friends in low places
Where the whiskey drowns
And the beer chases my blues away
And I'll be okay
I'm not big on social graces
Think I'll slip on down to the oasis
Oh, I've got friends in low places

Well, I guess I was wrong
I just don't belong
But then, I've been there before
Everything's all right
I'll just say goodnight
And I'll show myself to the door
Hey, I didn't mean
To cause a big scene
Just give me an hour and then
Well, I'll be as high
As that ivory tower
That you're livin' in

'Cause I've got friends in low places
Where the whiskey drowns
And the beer chases my blues away
And I'll be okay
I'm not big on social graces
Think I'll slip on down to the oasis
Oh, I've got friends in low places

[3rd Verse:]
I guess I was wrong
I just don't belong
But then, I've been there before
And everything is alright
I'll just say goodnight
And I'll show myself to the door
I didn't mean to cause a big scene
Just wait 'til I finish this glass
Then sweet little lady
I'll head back to the bar
And you can kiss my ass

Tuesday!

Hey buddies! It's Tuesday, and you all know what that means!!! 25 cent beers at Garnsey's!!! And it's Fat Tuesday, Mardi Gras!!



Mardi Gras is the best time of the year!! I love when people get all dressed up and do nothing but PAR-TAY! I hope you guys know what Mardi Gras is. I'll explain it a little bit! Every year on Fat Tuesay, the day before Ash Wednesday, the people of New Orleans throw a humungous party! The tradition is to gorge yourself and have as much fun as possible before you have to repent and fast for Lent. It is the best day of the year besides Christmas! Everyone dresses up in crazy costums and eats and drinks until they can't eat or drink anymore! You guys must go to New Orleans at leats once in your life to experience it, I guarantee it to be a great time!

I saw the wonderful amazing, I'm not ready for a relationship, boy this moring. I walked right by him and didn't even say hello. Carolina told me that he looked like I had just ripped out his heart and handed it to him on a silver platter. I feel so bad but you know what I couldn't talk to him, because now everytime I see him I feel like my heart is being ripped out. He needs to understand that what he did wasn't cool and that I'm still going to be here just not on the same level as before, unless he can get his shit together. I think that I just might be in love with him, I mean I thought that I was in love before but this is so much different. I mean like a million times a billion times different! I hope things will work out, I miss him holding me and his cute little smooches! :( Oh well, for now I shall stay friends with hima and see where things go. I think he just might go out with us tonight but I doubt it, if he is so sad. (BUT I'm sad too!). Oh well, here's the song of the day:

Avril Lavigne- Things I'll never say.

Da da da da da
[verse 1]
I’m tugging at my hair
I’m pulling at my clothes
I’m trying to keep my cool
I know it shows
I’m staring at my feet
My cheeks are turning red
I’m searching for the words inside my head
’coz I’m feeling nervous
Trying to be so perfect
’coz I know you’re worth it...you’re worth it...yeah

[chorus]
If I could say what I want to say
I’d say I want to blow you away
Be with you every night
Am I squeezing you too tight?
If I could say what I want to see
I want to see you go down on one knee...
Marry me today!
Guess I’m wishing my life away...
With these things I’ll never say

[verse 2]
It don’t do me any good
It’s just a waste of time
What use is it to you, what’s on my mind?
If it ain’t comin’ out
We’re not goin’ anywhere
So why can’t I just tell you that I care?
’coz I’m feeling nervous
Trying to be so perfect
’coz I know you’re worth it...you’re worth it...yeah

[chorus]
If I could say what I want to say
I’d say I want to blow you away
Be with you every night
Am I squeezing you too tight?
If I could say what I want to see
I want to see you go down on one knee
Marry me today!
Guess I’m wishing my life away...
With these things I’ll never say

[bridge]
What’s wrong?
With my song?
These words keep slippin’ away...
I stutter...i stumble
Like I’ve got nothin’ to sa-ay...
’coz I’m feelin’ nervous
Tryin’ to be so perfect
’coz I know you’re worth it...you’re worth it...yeah

Da da da da da da da da da...
Da da da da da da da da da...

Guess I’m wishing my life away
With these things I’ll never say
If I could say what I want to say
I’d say I want to blow you away
Be with you every night
Am I squeezing you too tight?
If I could say what I want to see
I want to see you go down on one knee
Marry me today
Guess I’m wishing my life away
With these things I’ll never say

With these things I’ll never sa-ay

I hope to God this picture thingie works!

Flogging Molly- The Worst Day Since Yesterday

Well I know, I miss more than hit
With a face that was launched to sink
An' I seldom feel, the bright relief
It's been the Worst Day Since Yesterday

If there's one thing I have said
Is that the dreams I once had, now lay in bed
As the four winds blow, my wits through the door
It's been the Worst Day Since Yesterday

Fallin' down to you sweet ground
Where the flowers they bloom
It's there I'll be found
Hurry back to me, my wild calling
It's been the Worst Day Since Yesterday

Though these wounds have seen no wars
Except for the scars I have ignored
And this endless crutch, well it's never enough
It's been the Worst Day Since Yesterday

Hell says hello, well it's time to I should go
To pastures green, that I've yet to see
Hurry back to me, my wild calling
It's been the Worst Day Since Yesterday

Monday, Monday!

Good Morning y'all! Well, it's about 9:20 in the morning and the sun still hasn't emerged. It's a rainy day and a Monday, the perfect concoction for a crappy day! This weekend was a good time, Garnsey's was the best. My favorite boy came out with me and Carolina. We played pool all night and had a rocking time. He kind of pissed me off however. We were discussing relationships when he told me that he doesn't want a girlfriend, I was like wtf!! I told him that I'm fine with him not wanting a girlfriend, but that he cannot act all cute and cuddle with me and kiss me, and hold my hand if he doesn't want to be like that. I told him that he needs to always be honest with me, because I will always be honest with him. And now he is sad, he said that he really likes me buthe just can't handle the responsibility of a girlfriend. Which is totally gay because I am so low maintenance that I'm sometimes below maintenance! So I wouldn't be that much of a responsibility. But he wants us to be best friends and to never stop talking, because he cares way too much about me to let anything come between us ever, and that if he was to have a girlfriend it would be me. So I'm not so much mad about that it's just that he was acting like he wanted to be my boyfriend and then he doesn't. And you should never do something like that if you want nothing to come of it, because then people get hurt (like me). But we are still friends and nothing will change, besides the cuddling and smooches (which I will miss immensly).

Song of the Day:
I'm not sad, I just like this song!

SIMPLE PLAN - Addicted

I heard you're doing okay
But I want you to know
I'm a dick
I'm addicted to you
I can't pretend I don't care
When you don't think about me
Do you think I deserve this?

I tried to make you happy but you left anyway

I'm trying to forget that
I'm addicted to you
But I want it and I need it
I'm addicted to you
Now it's over
Can't forget what you said
And I never wanna do this again
Heartbreaker

Since the day I met you
And after all we've been through
I'm still a dick
I'm addicted to you
I think you know that it's true
I'd run a thousand miles to get you
Do you think I deserve this?

I tried to make you happy
I did all that I could
Just to keep you
But you left anyway

How long will I be waiting?
Until the end of time
I don't know why I'm still waiting
I can't make you mine

Heartbreaker
I'm addicted to you

Sunday Mornin

Hey y'all whats shakin? Nothing much is going on here. Me and Carolina went out on the town last night. I have no idea how we even made it home in one piece!! It was wonderful, the great and amazing guy that I talk about so much came out with us and we played pool all night long. It was awesome!! He is being kind of weird right now but it's cool, I'm used to guys weirding out on me and then having to move on. But perhaps he will get his shit together soon and something will come of all this craziness. I would like that very much.

Here's the song of the day:

FLOGGING MOLLY - Irish Drinking Song

well i stumbled and i am all drunk and full of smoke
my wife said i have had enough, im sick, thats it, get out!
so i stumbled down to kellys pub across the edge of town
and i told the boys me story and we had another round

we'll drink, and drink, and drink, and drink, and drink, and
drink and fight!
we'll drink, and drink, and drink, and drink, and drink, and
drink and fight!
and if i see a pretty girl, ill sleep with her tonight!
we'll drink, and drink, and drink, and drink, and drink, and
drink and fight!

and mary mcgregor, she was a pretty whore
she'd always greet you with a smile and never lock her door
but on the day she died, all the men in town did weep
for mary mcgregor finally got some sleep

we'll drink, and drink, and drink, and drink, and drink, and
drink and fight!
we'll drink, and drink, and drink, and drink, and drink, and
drink and fight!
and if i see a pretty girl, ill sleep with her tonight!
we'll drink, and drink, and drink, and drink, and drink, and
drink and fight!

well i once loved a girl, a child im told
i gave her my heart and she gave my a cold
so now i sit standing here out in the pouring rain
ill stumble back to kellys pub and cry away me pain

we'll drink, and drink, and drink, and drink, and drink, and
drink and fight!
we'll drink, and drink, and drink, and drink, and drink, and
drink and fight!
and if i see a pretty girl, ill sleep with her tonight!
we'll drink, and drink, and drink, and drink, and drink, and
drink and fight!

Picture?

I hope this works! I like this picture!! Buddah Rocks!

~*TGIF*~

Thank God It's Friday! This week has been long and stressful, and yet full of fun and exciting things. I'm glad it's over however, because I'm tired and I want to go to bed. That reminds me of a song, for the movies Jaws.

Thats a good song! Its funny too. Last night was a blast! First, I got kicked out of a class/studyhall for being 5 minutes late. Then Me and Carolina went and played pool with her new love interest. (He is an awesome guy!) My wonderful love interest was sleeping so he didn't come to play with us. I felt bad because when I called him, he was sleeping, and he sounded sick. But oh well, we had fun besides. I believe that we will be hanging out this evening, perhaps we will finally watch that movie he has been wanting me to see for so long. Has anyone ever seen the Boondock Saints?? Well according to me boy its the best movie ever made. I don't know, but I haven't seen it yet so I won't judge until I have proof to hate it or like it.

g2g PusA <3

Song of the day!

Whiskey for my men, and beer for my horses
Tobyu Keith <3

Well, a man come on the 6 o'clock news
Said somebody's been shot, somebody's been abused
Somebody blew up a building
Somebody stole a car
Somebody got away
Somebody didn't get too far yeah
They didn't get too far

Grandpappy told my pappy, back in my day, son
A man had to answer for the wicked that he done
Take all the rope in Texas
Find a tall oak tree, round up all of them bad boys
Hang them high in the streets
For all the people to see

Chours:
That justice is the one thing you should always find
You got to saddle up your boys
You got to draw a hard line
When the gun smoke settles we'll sing a victory tune
We'll all meet back at the local saloon
We'll raise up our glasses against evil forces
Singing whiskey for my men, and beer for my horses

We've got too many gansters doing dirty deeds
Too much corruption and crime in the streets
It's time the long arm of the law put a few more in the ground
Send 'em all to their maker and he'll settle 'em down
You can bet he'll set 'em down, 'cause

Chours: x2

Today is a good day! I absolutely love country music and Toby Keith! Annie has yet to talk to me but she did get very mad at my friend Dan for talking to me yesterday. He told her that he wasn't going to get into the middle of it and I don't blame him. But she got all pissy with him and was like, if you talk to her then I'm not talking to you! And he was like, oh ok well then when you've decided to enter college and leave grade school behind give me a call, and he hasn't talked to her since. It is turly funny. I still haven't talked to her and I'm so happy right now you have no idea. I am sitting here at work with nothing to do but talk to you guys, and I don't have to worry about her coming in and bugging me. YAY!!! And I got to see my splendiferous boy last night, it was only for like 5 minutes but I was happy. He is so very handsome and just wonderful. I really hope that everything works out this time. I am so scared, because everytime I find someone who is great almost as great as him, it never works out. I want this one to work for a long time, not forever, but a long time. He lights up my heart. I love being around him and I can't stand it when I can't see him. But I do not goes so far as to call him everyday, or go to see him everyday. We both are able to stay laid back, even though when we are together its like there is no one else in the world, even if we are surrounded by a million other people. Well, speak of the devil, I must be going now for my prince is here. <3

PusA <3

Song of the day!

Wonderful Tonight- Eric Clapton <3

It's late in the evening; she's wondering what clothes to wear.
She puts on her make-up and brushes her long blonde hair.
And then she asks me, "Do I look all right?"
And I say, "Yes, you look wonderful tonight."

We go to a party and everyone turns to see
This beautiful lady that's walking around with me.
And then she asks me, "Do you feel all right?"
And I say, "Yes, I feel wonderful tonight."

I feel wonderful because I see
The love light in your eyes.
And the wonder of it all
Is that you just don't realize how much I love you.

It's time to go home now and I've got an aching head,
So I give her the car keys and she helps me to bed.
And then I tell her, as I turn out the light,
I say, "My darling, you were wonderful tonight.
Oh my darling, you were wonderful tonight."

This is the best song of all times!! I love being in Love!!

PusA <3

Wednesday!

Well I finally did it! I cut off the friend or should I say ex-friend that has been pissing me off for almost 8 years now! I told her exactly how I feel and that I never want to speak with her again, and I couldn't be happier. She has done nothing but verbally abuse me, tease me, and embarass me all the 10 years I've known her. She follows me around everywhere talking about this gay ass guy that I don't even care about and won't stop stalking him. She comes to my library where I work and follows me around as I shelve books. She has no other friends besides me (not anymore) because everyone tells me that they can't stand her and how annoying she is. And on Monday night she finally went too far.

Here's what happened:

On Monday, I went over to the dorms at school to drop off my friend's sweatshirt that I had borrowed from the night before. He wasn't there so I just hung out and waited for him. I ended up playing pool with a couple of my other friends while waiting, and that's when it happened. My dear friend Jim came into the game room and was like hey, (my name) you need to talk to Annie. I was like why do I need to talk to her, what's wrong? Is she okay? He was like yeah she's fine, but she won't be when you talk to her. So I was like okay well then tell me what's up. He then told me that there are rumors going around that he and Annie are sleeping together. Which isn't true. He said that he knew she would be upset so he felt that I should tell her, because I've known here for so long and she trusts me. So when I got home I called her and told her. She started crying and freaking out saying that she hated our school and that it was just like high school and that everything bad happens to her. Well, this is the first time in the 10 years I've known her that anyone has ever started a rumor like this about her. Litte side note, 3 monthes ago there were rumors that I was sleeping with half of the football team, which wasn't true. You need to know that or what I say next will make no sense. So anyways, she then proceeded to tell me that I don't understand what she is going through, to which I replied yes I do. (obviously) She then said that people like me don't care about these sort of things because they really do them. She then said you know those rumors about you, they didn't ebarass you because that's what you're like. I then said to her. First of all just because I've had sex does not mean that I slept with half the football team nor does it make me a whore! And secondly, what I do has no relavence to what you do or don't do. So don't sit here and call me a whore when I'm not. Then she told me that because she is a virgin it is so much more embarassing for her. And that people like me can't understand that. So I told her that she obviously doesn't know me that well if she is going to talk to me that way and I told her to call Jim and cry to him because I am sick of her shit.
Next comes Tuesday afternoon, scene: cafeteria. She walks passed me and smiles and says hey. I turn away and tell her that I'm not talking to her. She then Shouts: What the fuck is your problem?! I turned to her and said, Go away I'm not talking to you. She leaves but proceeds to text message me that she wants to talk. I tell her no, and don't see here for the rest of the day. I then get an email from her saying I don't know what the fuck your problem is, I was upset and I didn't mean it to come out that way. But you need to think about it this way folks, if she didn't mean then why would she say it in the first place. I know we all say things we don't mean, but to insist that 'PEOPLE LIKE ME' don't understand is just retarded! So I emailed her back and told her all the things about her that had been pissing me off for the past 8 years of our 'friendship'. I told her that she wouldn't say something like that if she didn't really think it and that if her fucking reputation is so importatnt to her then she shouldn't be hanging out with me. Because you are what you hang with, and if she thinks that I'm a whore, then obviously other people do and they will then assume that she is too. I told her that just like our ex-friend Jamie that i cut off 1 year ago I was cutting her off. I told her not to phone me because I won't answer and not to address me in public because I will ignore her. SHe has yet to email me or attempt to call me, so I can only pray that she isn't planning on shooting me today. But right now I could care less. Well, I have to go because I have class in like 30 minutes and I have to figure out how to ignore her because I have that class with her.

I feel so much better about not having to talk to her. I feel as if a weight has been lifted off my chest. I am also happy because of the most splendiferous boy in the world. He is sweet and likes to cuddle (snuggle as he likes to say) and I can't believe that he actually likes me. We have been friends all year and there has always been something there between us, and now it has moved past friends to snuggle buddies and cute little smooches and love songs. I can't wait to see him again. Well I must be going now, for real this time.

PusA <3

Tuesday...

Hey all, today is Tuesday February 1st, 2005. I'm feeling great! I'm really tired and I have to go and work out in like 30 minutes :( poo!): But it's okay I shall survive. There really isn't much I can think of to tell you guys today, so I'll just leave you with the song of the day.

Beatles - Something<3

Something in the way she moves
Attracts me like no other lover
Something in the way she woos me

I don't want to leave her now
You know I believe her now

Somewhere in her smile she knows
That I don't need no other lover
Something in her style that shows me

Don't want to leave her now
You know I believe her now

You're asking me will my love grow
I don't know, I don't know
You stick around now it may show
I don't know, I don't know

Something in the way she knows
And all I have to do is think of her
Something in the things she shows me

Don't want to leave her now
You know I believe her now


Beatles - Get Back

Jojo was a man who thought he was a loner
But he knew it wouldn't last.
Jojo left his home in Tucson, Arizona
For some California grass.

Get back, get back.
Get back to where you once belonged
Get back, get back.
Get back to where you once belonged.
Get back Jojo. Go home
Get back, get back.
Back to where you once belonged
Get back, get back.
Back to where you once belonged.
Get back Jo.

Sweet Loretta Martin thought she was a woman
But she was another man
All the girls around her say she's got it coming
But she gets it while she can

Get back, get back.
Get back to where you once belonged
Get back, get back.
Get back to where you once belonged.
Get back Loretta. Go home
Get back, get back.
Get back to where you once belonged
Get back, get back.
Get back to where you once belonged.
Get back Loretta

Your mother's waiting for you
Wearing her high-heel shoes
And her low-neck sweater
Get on home Loretta

Get back, get back.
Get back to where you once belonged

I couldn't decide on just one so you guys are blessed with two!
PusA <3