...one last goodbye...

14.06.2008., subota

I'll keep takin' punches until their will grows tired......

I will light the match this mornin', so I won't be alone
Watch as she lies silent, for soon night will be gone

I will stand arms outstretched, pretend I'm free to roam
I will make my way, through, one more day in Hell...
How much difference does it make

I will hold the candle till it burns up my arm
I'll keep takin' punches until their will grows tired
I will stare the sun down until my eyes go blind
I won't change direction, and I won't change my mind
How much difference does it make

I'll swallow poison, until I grow immune
I will scream my lungs out till it fills this room



slusajuci ovu pjesmu,, (Pearl Jam - Indifference) prije bih se tako unistio da to nije normalno... zasto? pa procitaj rijeci, ako si i donekle pametan i ako znas engleski, skuzit ces,, jer ako postoje jace rijeci u nekoj pjesmi, ako postoji nesto ovako snazno i dubokoumno,, evo,, reci mi, ja idem skociti sa svoje zgrade,,, naravno da necu! heh...


I'll keep takin' punches until their will grows tired

ovaj dio pjesme sam si ponavljao svaki dan... od onoga dana kada se dogodila ta nesreca,, svaki dan sam si ovo ponavljao,,, samo,, sto je to tada bilo samo jedno malo varanje samog sebe,, jer nisam tako zivio... jer sam dopustao da me svaki "njihov" uidarac srusi na zemlju i ostavi u lokvi krvi dugo vremena,,, ali vec neko vrijeme,, nema sanse...
onaj moj zadnji post je jedan trenutak slabosti koji sam si dopustio... ali smatram da je bolje da sam ovako to napravio nego da sam se isao razracunati sa tim osobama na koje sam mislio dok sam pisao post... da,, mozda bih prije,, ma ne mozda,, nego sigurno bih prije nekog vremena to sve rijesio galamom, vrijedjanjem, sakama ili kako vec,, ali sada.. ma ne zelim! dosta sranja, dosta prepiranja, dosta gluposti,, ali sada,, ma "udaraj me",, ali sada, mislim da ce prije oslabiti tvoja volja, nego moja snaga... ma dosta svega!! doslovno... naravno, dosta tih losih stvari! da se ne bi netko nasao pametan pa pomislio da mi je dosta svega! ma neee... daleko iza mene je to... a preporucujem i tebi to... sjedni sam sa sobom, skuzi neke stvari i ostavi se crnjaka... jer mora doci dobra stvar... sada ces reci, "ajde ne seri budalo kako je tebi bilo!",, istina je to! ali sada vise nije, i zato ti to kazem,, jer poslje svega odvratnog mora doci dobro... sada kada pogledam na sebe prije i vidim u kakvom sam Qrcu bio,, sam se sebi pocnem smijati.. doslovno! ali ne zalim niti za jednim trenutkom, niti jednom pustenom suzom,,, zasto? ma nemam pojma! tako je bilo, neke stvari ostaju zauvijek u srcu, a neke stvari dolaze... i tako ce uvijek biti...

smisao posta? NE ZNAM!! slusao sam neke pjesme,, a kada sam dosao do ove pjesme,, sa osmjehom sam ju pjevao,, i onda se sjetio svojih starih dana, pogledao na sadasnje vrijeme (HVALA ljubavi na svemu!) i skuzio da sam ja ustvari jedan sretan mali djecak! a sada pravom osobom uz sebe, mislim da cu takav i ostati... hihihihi....

ma hajde! odo uciti,, =)

uzivaj mi...








vjeruj mi,, prije ces se ti umoriti... jadniče jedan...





- 10:34 - reci SVE (0) - * - #

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_____________________________




sve... i nista...

nemam pojma sto pisati... vidjet ces... nadam se da ce tu biti svega..

vremena se nadam da imam, volje bas i nemam, ali to je i glavni pokretac svega ovoga... jer zbog bezvoljnosti, praznine i svega toga sam se i odlucio na ovo...

sada, evo nakon 2 mjeseca pauze... vratio sam se i ja... znam da sam malo zapustio, ali promijenit cu se ja... hehehehe... vazno je obecati,, a da li ces ispuniti, ma tko te pita....




ako me trebas, evo... javi se...


MSN

granicarZU@hotmail.com




_____________________________

All the hate that feeds your needs
All the sickness you conceive
All the horror you create
Will bring you to your knees

_____________________________

I take a walk outside
I'm surrounded by some kids at play
I can feel their laughter, so why do I sear
and twisted thoughts that spin round my head
I'm spinning, I'm spinning
How quick the sun can, drop away
And now my bitter hands cradle broken glass
Of what was everything?
All the pictures have all been washed in black, tattooed everything...
All the love gone bad turned my world to black
Tattooed all I see, all that I am, all that I'll be...

I know someday you'll have a beautiful life, I know you'll be a star
In somebody else's sky, but why
Why, why can't it be, why can't it be mine

_____________________________

I see a girl in the night with a baby in her hands
Under an old street light, oh, near a garbage can
Now she put her kid away, she's gone to get a hit
She hates her life, and what she's done with it
That's one more kid, that'll never go to school
Never get to fall in love, never get to be cool

_____________________________

Don't even think about reachin' me, I won't be home
Don't even think about stoppin' by, don't think of me at all
I did, what I had to do, if there was a reason, it was you...

Don't even think about gettin' inside
Voices in me head...ooh, voices
I got scratches, all over my arms
One for each day, since I fell apart

I did...oh, what I had to do, if there was a reason, it was you

Footsteps in the hall, it was you, you...
Pictures on my chest, it was you, it was you...

I did, what I had to do... and if there was a reason
Oh, there wasn't no reason, no
And if, there's something you'd like to do
Just let me continue, to blame you

Footsteps in the hall, it was you, you...
Pictures on my chest, it was you, you...

_____________________________

I admit it...what's to say...
I'll relive it...without pain...mmm...
Backstreet lover on the side of the road
I got a bomb in my temple that is gonna explode
I got a sixteen gauge buried under my clothes, I pray...
Once upon a time I could control myself
Once upon a time I could lose myself

_____________________________

Is something wrong, she said
Well of course there is
You're still alive, she said
And do I deserve to be
Is that the questionpar
And if so...if so...who answers?? who answers??

_____________________________

Bury me softly in this womb
I give this part of me for you
Sand rains down and here I sit
Holding rare flowers
In a tomb...in bloom

Down in a hole and I don't know if I can be saved
See my heart I decorate it like a grave
You don't understand who they
Thought I was supposed to be
Look at me now a man
Who won't let himself be

Down in a hole, losin' my soul
Down in a hole, losin' control
I'd like to fly,
But my wings have been so denied

Down in a hole and they've put all
The stones in their place
I've eaten the sun so my tongue
Has been burned of the taste
I have been guilty
Of kicking myself in the teeth
I will speak no more
of my feelings beneath

Oh I want to be inside of you

_____________________________

I will light the match this mornin', so I won't be alone
Watch as she lies silent, for soon night will be gone

I will stand arms outstretched, pretend I'm free to roam
I will make my way, through, one more day in Hell...
How much difference does it make


I will hold the candle till it burns up my arm
I'll keep takin' punches until their will grows tired
I will stare the sun down until my eyes go blind
Hey, I won't change direction, and I won't change my mind
How much difference does it make
Mmm, how much difference does it make...how much difference...

I'll swallow poison, until I grow immune
I will scream my lungs out till it fills this room
How much difference
How much difference does it make


_____________________________




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