Ainulindale

Recently I saw this episode of Tree hill when this guy brought a gun to school. None of it made much impact on me except one thing that a woman who was reporting for the news said. She said - "We are a country obsessed with tragedy." It did not strike me as odd that America was obsessed with tragedy but it's not just America. The whole world has become obsessed with tragedy. So I decided to give it some thought. Why is this happening? Have we become so familiar with pain that we thrive on it? I always said that pain is a too large amount of pleasure and that sometimes pain can be pleasing if our pain threshold is great, but have we pushed the line so far that we no longer feel pain as it should be, as hurting, as bad. Today, I often come across people whose life is a mess. They are hurting. I'm sure you have too, and tell me - have you tried to offer help to those people? The most common answer to that is - I can't be helped, which is of course BS. There is no hurt that can't be cured if you set your mind to curing it. However, these people really can't be helped, because they don't want any help. Find sense in that! Find sense in someone's decision not to help themselves! The only reasonable thing I can pull out of that is that they don't want help because the state that they are in has become a permanent resident in their mind and now, it doesn't really hurt. It's just there, and we all know that we'd rather have something inside of us, even if it's pain, than nothing at all. Now how did it come to this? How did it happen that we must find comfort in devastating feelings? Maybe other feelings just aren't strong enough, maybe they just aren't doing it for us, aren't good enough. Or maybe it's because good feelings are hard to find, so we turn to whatever's left, because that's all we have and because we need little effort to get it. People have just stopped trying to be happy.
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I won't fall with the rest of you. I won't surrender to grief, sorrow and pain. Why? I could so easily enjoy pain, I've had my share of it by now. I probably could find a way to savor it. So why won't I? BECAUSE IT'S JUST WRONG! Not the way it's supposed to be. It's a thing of moral, I guess. Those people, and a lot of other, "happy", people often say - That's just who I am and I can't change it...
Can't or won't? Why don't you strive to being better, to improving yourself. You'll never hear me say that I can't change. The only thing I can change and improve in this world is myself. Imperare sibi maximum imperium est!