Konacno disem punim plucima
Ola, ljudi, evo me nakon ''male'' pauze..
Ne da mi se objasnjavat razloge toga sta me nije bilo, ali jednostavno, bilo mi je dosta toga da mi se neki ljudi petljaju u život. I da, moj topli (zapravo hladniji od leda) pozdrav Katarini S Lošom Frizurom, kojoj bih samo poručila da se pokopa koliko je glupa (inače ona jako voli čitati moj blog).
Ali pustimo sad glupe ljude, neće mi oni biti tema posta. Otkad me nije bilo, puno se toga promijenilo, neka moja mišljenja (neka i dalje ostaju nepromijenjena), ali najviše raspoloženje. Možda je to samo privremeno, možda mi je samo proljeće udarilo u glavu, a možda i nije. Uglavnom, shvatila sam neke stvari koje prije nisam shvaćala. Dobila sam priličnu dozu samopouzdanja, pogotovo nakon onog sranja s debilčinama iz mog razreda. Zbog njih sam shvatila, koliko god ja loše mišljenje imala o sebi, uvijek postoje ljudi koji su: a) gluplji od mene, b) jadniji od mene, c) lošije osobe od mene, d) sve ono ostalo. Dosta je samo bacit pogled na većinu mog razreda i sve to vidim. Jedna stvar mi nije jasna... Zasto svi tvrde da je gimnazija elita? Ma po čemu? Isprika svim gimnazijalcima koji nisu takvi,ali za mene je gimnazija nula. Mislim da gimnazije pohađaju najmanje inteligentni ljudi (opet isprika iznimkama) – zajebite to sta su sposobni svasta nastrebat, kad se radi o njihovim postupcima i razmišljanjima, sve sam uvjerenija u to. Možda je tako samo u mojoj selendri gdje svatko svakoga pozna, ali iskreno, čisto sumnjam.
No, dobro. Neki stavovi su mi ipak ostali nepromijenjeni, npr ovaj: Život je sranje, sreća ne postoji. Život je sranje, ali kad se već ne možemo ubit, trebamo se šta više zajebavat da nam bude bolje. jer život je zajebancija – danas si živ, sutra te nema – skoro nitko te se ne sjeća kad umreš, a kad umru i oni šta su te se sjećali, više ne postojiš nigdje. Treba samo živjet za zajebanciju, pa makar se sa 20 godina ponašali kao klinci iz vrtića. Ja muškima uopće ne zamjeram šta su djetinjasti, bar im je dobro u životu i boli ih kurac za sve. vjerojatno mi je zato puno bolje bit u muškom društvu nego u ženskom – ženske uglavnom previše kompliciraju.
Da sreća ne postoji, to ću isto tvrdit. postoje 2 razdoblja, kad ti je dobro i kad ti je loše, kakva jebena sreća. šta bi trebala bit sreća – kad imaš ''najboljeg tipa na svijetu'', prosjek 5,00 i lovu do krova? ma daj, jebeš to. ja nikad neću reći da sam sretna ili da želim biti sretna jer u sreću jednostavno ne vjerujem. naslušala sam se toliko priča o sreći da mi ju je više pun kurac.
jedna moja frendica je na blogu napisala da ne zna kako bi pomogla nekome tko je u bedu. napisala sam joj da ne može nikako pomoći. znam po sebi. Kad sam ja bila sjebana nitko mi nije mogao pomoći. Govorili su mi svašta, a mene je baš bilo briga. i sad me baš briga za to šta su mi svi govorili jer nije imalo ama bas nikakvog poboljšavajućeg efekta, eventualno bih se katkad osjećala još gore. sve dok nisam rekla: Boli me kurac za sve, neću se više oko ničega živcirat, živjet ću za zajebanciju. i sve je okej dok se mogu smijati, pogotovo najbanalnijim glupostima. Koliko mi se raspoloženje popravilo, shvatila sam i kad sam u subotu bila vani. smijala sam se kao luda, a do nas je došao neki lik koji me u 11.mjesecu pokušavao natjerat da se nasmijem, ali mu nije baš uspijevalo. u subotu mi je rekao: Sad se smiješ!
Sad mi je svejedno za sve, tako mi je dobro i nitko mi ništa ne može!!
Jedino me baci u bed kad čujem da je netko poginuo u prometnoj. uvijek me je strah da ću jednom čuti da se to desilo nekome koga poznam, nekome tko mi je drag. pogotovo sad kad se svi malo pomalo bližimo punoljetnosti i dobivanju vozačke.
Ah, moram se osvrnuti i na nešzo zvano ljubav (to mi ni najmanje nije utjecalo na raspoloženje, bez brige). U jednoj knjizi sam pročitala: Voljeti onoga tko voli tebe, to je narcizam, ali voljeti onoga tko te ne voli, to je ljubav.
Možda se nećete složiti s tim ali ako malo razmislite o toj rečenici, shvatit ćete koliko je istinita.
Još jedna stvar – živciranje radi tipova, shvatila sam koliko to nema smisla. neznam zašto su svim ženskama oni centar svijeta, pa ima u životu još zanimljivih stvari osim njih. ako naiđe netko zanimljiv, okej, ako ne, zašto ga tražiti?
Jedino sta me trenutno može raživcirati je kad vidim ljude da se živciraju oko najbanalnijih gluposti (i to žešće se živciraju) ili kad se živciraju oko još veće gluposti – novca. jebo vas novac, nećete umrijet ako ne dobijete svaku glupost koju poželite. To me baš uspije naživcirat i spustit mi raspoloženje. ali postalo mi je jako zabavno kad me netko nađe uvjeravat da za nešto nemam pravo iako sam ne 100 nego 200% u pravu. a šta ćete. možda malo postajem nemoguća, ali bolje tako nego ono šta je bilo prije... bar je meni bolje 
06.04.2007. u 19:47 |
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Opis bloga
Bas moram pisati taj opis bloga? Dobro, pa... Blog ce, buduci da ga ne pise nitko pametan, biti pun gluposti, mozda mi izleti koja pametna, ali tesko...
jedna od meni najdrazih:
Sleeping Sun
The sun is sleeping quietly
Once upon a century
Wistful oceans calm and red
Ardent caresses laid to rest
For my dreams I hold my life
For wishes I behold my night
The truth at the end of time
Losing faith makes a crime
I wish for this night-time
to last for a lifetime
The darkness around me
Shores of a solar sea
Oh how I wish to go down with the sun
Sleeping
Weeping
With you
Sorrow has a human heart
From my god it will depart
I'd sail before a thousand moons
Never finding where to go
Two hundred twenty-two days of light
Will be desired by a night
A moment for the poet's play
Until there's nothing left to say
I wish for this night-time...
I wish for this night-time...
brojac od 10.6.2006.
MOJ BIJELI LABUDE
I bas me briga
ko te nocas vozi kuci,
briga me
I ako si i sretna ko sto kazes,
mada znam da lazes
sve to ubija me
Hmmm, grlim hladne jastuke
hmmm, moj bijeli labude
I briga me sto nisi mjesec,
a ni sunce, briga me
al' neces moci preko
blatne kaljuze
cista stic' do moje postelje
Hmmm, grlim hladne jastuke
Ref. 2x
Moj bijeli labude
kad me jednom ne bude
sve ce vode, labude
da se razbistre
I bas me briga
ko te nocas vozi kuci,
briga me
I ako si i sretna ko sto kazes,
mada znam da lazes
sve to ubija me
Hmmm, grlim hladne jastuke
Ref. 4x
Ja sam samo jedna luda romanticna dusa kojoj nema spasa... sanjar do boli... ako se ikad promijenim, znaci da mi se nesto gadno desilo... jer nisam osoba koja je sposobna nosit masku...
White Night Fantasy
Enchantress came to me and said:
Meet me at the lake tonight
I hummed this song to the white
Through the shroud of snow I saw
Paradise
Peace
No more lies
Crestfallen soul
Rest for this night
Love is here
Right here under my wings
I dream of wolves with them I run
For me she lengthened the night
I am home
I am in peace
Crestfallen soul
Rest for this night
Love is here
Right here under my wings
Molim vas, pomozite Zeki!!!
(__/)
(O.o)
(> < )
Ovo je Gothik - Sado Mazo - Zeko. Kopirajte ga na svoj blog i tako mu pomognite na njegovom putu do World Domination!!!
Linkovi
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Naj blogovi:
:: marriana ::
Vedrana
Jelena
Marija
unforgettable lady
Amy
heretik
V4MP1R3
Bestia
panic queen
nivblf
ledena kraljica
..kaya..
cat
Lambalicious
Lakeisha
Broken Crystal Doll
honorina
Kika
Laura
Sara
Anita
pjesma za mene:
Papa Roach "Sometimes"
I'm dreamin about tomorrow, I'm thinkin of yesterday, I consume myself in sorrow this moment in time is what I betray, I
am searching for the answers
[Chorus]
I look around sometimes I get sad, 'Cause I don't know which way to go, I look around sometimes I get sad, 'Cause my life
is spinning out of control
I never know what you want, I never know what you need, it was different from the start, when you cut me in two I never
thought I would bleed, but I am searching for the answers
[Chorus]
I will go this alone I don't need nobody's help, I've got to do this myself, Alone, Alone, Alone, Alone
[Chorus x2]
LET 3 - Dijete u vremenu
Gledam u tuznu jesenju noc
s pokisle grane lisce otpada
u daljini cujem muziku neku
i pitam sebe, gdje li si sada
Ja svakog dana proklinjem sebe
zasto te drugom prepustih lako
pjevao sam pjesme, nad'o se boljem
i bezbroj puta uz gitaru plak'o
Ref.
Nisi me voljela u ono vrijeme
a ja sam zelio samo jedno
sad kada nismo mi mladi k'o nekada
dodji da ostarimo zajedno
Da li jos pamtis ljubavi moja
kako smo ruze zajedno brali
gdje li si sada mladosti moja
zasto su tebe od mene ukrali
Achtung, Achtung
ein animalischen sex
mit die zwei penzioneren
sport und elegantisch
Oder extravagantisch
atention, atention
für die grosse erektion
liebe Penis, liebe zwei
liebe sex abnormal
Nisi me voljela u ono vrijeme
a ja sam zelio samo jedno...
nisi me voljela u ono vrijeme
a ja sam zelio samo jedno
sad kada nismo mi mladi ko nekada
dodi da ostarimo zajedno...
EPICA Dance Of Fate
When darkness will reign and blind us all
When darkness will reign and blind us all
Allegiance will bind us if we do not fall
We cannot tell when morning comes
Is there a choice to live another day?
It's hard to find a new direction in your fragile life
The precious time of your existence is now to come
Don't throw your life away by cheating time
Sugared placebos only fool your mind
Now I want the water to wash away all my sins
The wind to blow away my thoughts without meaning
The fire to burn away my thickened skin
When darkness will reign and blind us all
Allegiance will bind us if we do not fall
Novas portas pandimus
What is this pace, the type of dance?
I cannot tell which steps I have to take
I'd like to leave, just run away
My feet are tangled up
So hard to face the pace of the clock
What do you think; will it ever stop?
So will I fall and not get up?
I take it all in stride
Now I want the water to wash away all my sins
The wind to blow away my thoughts without meaning
The fire to burn away my thickened skin
Everything has a reason for its happening
Can't you tell it's your own spell and
Everyone has to dance this dance like anyone
Can't break free of destiny
We should open new doors and
Close the ones that we've left behind
Now I want the water to wash away all my sins
The wind to blow away my thoughts without meaning
The fire to burn away my thickened skin
When darkness will reign and blind us all
Allegiance will bind us if we do not fall
Novas portas pandimus
Et post nos occludimus
Nightwish - Feel For You
You were my first love
The earth moving under me
Bedroom scent, beauty ardent
Distant shiver, heaven sent
I'm the snow on your lips
The freezing taste, the silvery sip
I'm the breath on your hair
The endless nightmare, devil's lair
Only so many times
I can say I long for you
The lily among the thorns
The prey among the wolves
Someday, I will feed a snake
Drink her venom, stay awake
With time all pain will fade
Through your memory I will wade
Barely cold in her grave
Barely warm in my bed
Settling for a draw tonight
Puppet girl, your strings are mine
This one is for you for you
Only for you
Just give in to it never think again
I feel for you
Nightwish - Dead Gardens
The story behind the painting I drew is already told
No more tearstains on the pages of my diary
Tired but unable to give up since I`m
Responsible for the lives I saved
The play is done
The curtain`s down
All the tales are told
All the orchids gone
Lost in my own world
Now I care for dead gardens
My song is little worth anymore
Time to lay this weary pen aside
The play is done
The curtain`s down
"Where are the wolves, the underwater moon
The elvenpath, the haven of youth
Lagoons of the starlit sea
Have I felt enough for one man`s deed?
Or is it time to challenge the Ancient of Days
And let the virgin conceive"
All the tales...
Cradle of filth - Nymphetamine
Lead to the river
Midsummer, I waved
A 'V'' of black swans
On with hope to the grave
All through Red September
With skies fire-paved
I begged you appear
Like a thorn for the holy ones
Cold was my soul
Untold was the pain
I faced when you left me
A rose in the rain
So I swore to the razor
That never, enchained
Would your dark nails of faith
Be pushed through my veins again
Bared on your tomb
I'm a prayer for your loneliness
And would you ever soon
Come above unto me?
For once upon a time
From the binds of your lowliness
I could always find
The right slot for your sacred key
Six feet deep is the incision
In my heart, that barless prison
Discolours all with tunnel vision
Sunsetter
Nymphetamine
Sick and weak from my condition
This lust, a vampyric addiction
To her alone in full submission
None better
Nymphetamine
Nymphetamine, nymphetamine
Nymphetamine girl
Nymphetamine, nymphetamine
My nymphetamine girl
Wracked with your charm
I am circled like prey
Back in the forest
Where whispers persuade
More sugar trails
More white lady laid
Than pillars of salt
Fold to my arms
Hold their mesmeric sway
And dance her to the moon
As we did in those golden days
Christening stars
I remember the way
We were needle and spoon
Mislaid in the burning hay
Bared on your tomb
I'm a prayer for your loneliness
And would you ever soon
Come above unto me?
For once upon a time
From the binds of your holiness
I could always find
The right slot for your sacred key
Six feet deep is the incision
In my heart, that barless prison
Discolours all with tunnel vision
Sunsetter
Nymphetamine
Sick and weak from my condition
This lust, a vampyric addiction
To her alone in full submission
None better
Nymphetamine
Sunsetter
Nymphetamine (Nymphetamine)
None better
Nymphetamine
KORN - Thoughtless
Thumbing through the pages of my fantasies
Pushing all the mercy down, down, down
I wanna see you try to take a swing at me
Come on, gonna put you on the ground, ground, ground
Why are you trying to make fun of me?
You think it's funny?
What the fuck you think it's doing to me?
You take your turn lashing out at me
I want you crying with your dirty ass in front of me
All of my hate cannot be found
I will not be drowned by your thoughtless scheming
So you can try to tear me down
Beat me to the ground
I will see you screaming
Thumbing through the pages of my fantasies
I'm above you, smiling at you, drown, drown, drown
I wanna kill and rape you the way you raped me
And I'll pull the trigger
And you're down, down, down
Why are you trying to make fun of me?
You think it's funny?
What the fuck you think it's doing to me?
You take your turn lashing out at me
I want you crying with your dirty ass in front of me
All of my hate cannot be found
I will not be drowned by your thoughtless scheming
So you can try to tear me down
Beat me to the ground
I will see you screaming
All my friends are gone, they died (gonna take you down)
They all screamed, and cried (gonna take you down)
I've got my body, got my body back against the wall
I've got my body, got my body back against the wall
Gonna take you down
[repeat 2x]
I've got my body, got my body back against the wall
I've got my body, got my body back against the...
All of my hate cannot be found
I will not be drowned by your thoughtless scheming
So you can try to tear me down
Beat me to the ground
I will see you screaming
All of my hate cannot be found
I will not be drowned by your thoughtless scheming
So you can try to tear me down
Beat me to the ground
I will see you screaming
Missing
Please, please forgive me,
But I won't be home again.
Maybe someday you'll look up,
And, barely conscious, you'll say to no one:
"Isn't something missing?"
You won't cry for my absence, I know -
You forgot me long ago.
Am I that unimportant...?
Am I so insignificant...?
Isn't something missing?
Isn't someone missing me?
[Chorus:]
Even though I'm the sacrifice,
You won't try for me, not now.
Though I'd die to know you love me,
I'm all alone.
Isn't someone missing me?
Please, please forgive me,
But I won't be home again.
I know what you do to yourself,
I breathe deep and cry out,
"Isn't something missing?
Isn't someone missing me?"
[Chorus]
And if I bleed, I'll bleed,
Knowing you don't care.
And if I sleep just to dream of you
I'll wake without you there,
Isn't something missing?
Isn't something...
[Chorus]
