besserdechnaya diary

subota, 31.10.2009.

studying is bad for the brain

Here comes an example of the Very Deep Thoughts that go through my brain when I'm working in the library. Or rather, should be working. This one is about textbooks and articles.When you're talking about books, especially textbooks, you're more likely to say, for example, "the Zimbardo" instead of "Psychology and Life". In German with it's funny usage of "der, die, das" it would be "der Zimbardo". Now, my question is: to what exactly does the "der" refer to? It can't be book because then it would be "das Zimbardo". So, I figure it must be the author himself. But what do we call those textbooks written by women? Would "Social psychology of the Internet" be "die Dring" then? And what about those books written by male and female authors like the Bortz/Dring? I know it's called "der Bortz/Dring" but why not call it "das Bortz/Dring"? All I'm saying is that there should gender equality among textbooks, too.

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utorak, 27.10.2009.

research! OMG!

I'd like you all to meet my new big love. We met in a dark corner of the university library and it was love on first sight. Unfortunately, we can't be together because, well, she belongs to her world and I to mine.Fortunately, there are many copies.And I'm going to order mine from Amazon: OMG isn't she like the most beautiful textbook ever!?

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petak, 23.10.2009.

because being random is a good way to start a new year

*stares at calender* My, it's that late already?New Year's Eve was spectacularly uneventful and I rather like it that way.I suffer from an overdose of a certain actually-meant-for-kids show. And I re-watched the movie two times and OMG best Disney movie ever!!!I absolutely love and adore my little multi-media player. I named it 1812.Sledging is fun but it hurts the brain.*watches more Full Metal Alchemist* What do you mean Envy is a "he"...?I ate sushi for the first time in my life. Tastes like chewing leather. But I didn't die so that's something.I already had my first university angst moment today. I'm herewith allowing everyone to kick me every time I angst unnecessarily about uni related stuff.

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srijeda, 21.10.2009.

endolyn

endolyn: your present has arrived!!! EEEEEE!!! TARDIS!!!!! I'll now fight the evil aliens that came with it and have a cup of tea ;).Am now off to visit parents and hopefully go sledging. In a very grown-up and mature manner of course.

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srijeda, 14.10.2009.

really deep thoughts

Winter is not good for me. It makes me tired and exhausted. Or maybe that's uni.Yesterday I spent about 11 hours working on a "voluntary" mini report for today. Remind me to never do that again.I've got one exam less this semester than I thought I would have. That's a definite and very relieved Whee! .I finally got my copy of Anansi Boys. It looks shiny.My sister started reading Harry Potter. I feel very proud.I made someone watch Shaun of the Dead and she loved it. I feel very proud of that, too.When I press my head against the heater, I can hear the neighbor's music.I think when Adam von Fulda said that music was a "meditatio mortis" it was a very pretty thing to say.I need snow.

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ponedjeljak, 12.10.2009.

I'm feeling the annual winter down

I'm feeling the annual winter down. I'm highly unmotivated (which is a really really big problem), haven't done anything for uni for the last two and a half days and all I really want to do is crawl into some place warm and sleep til it's light again outside. On the bright side, I'm already madly in love with the new Doctor. Isn't he cute and pretty and seemingly quite insane? It's the slightly going mad part that got me. That and the hopping. Is it Christmas yet?Also, something I've only noticed yesterday after finally getting a good quality version of the clip and thus understanding the dialogs...does that mean they left Jack behind on purpose? To me it sounded like Rose wanted to go back but then the Doctor had his crazy moment and they set off...Now I'll go and look for something that helps me wake up, because if I screw up this semester, I will have screwed up big time. Gah.

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subota, 10.10.2009.

OMG OMG confrontation therapy totally works and has cool side effects and OMG I'm feeling so WHEE!!!

Okay, so there's this thing called "Kulturpolitscher Salon" and I'm too lazy to look it up and anyway, it's like a discussion round. You get a bunch of a lot of different people and make them talk about a preferably controversial topic (today it was globalization) and let the audience ask question and see what happens. I didn't want to go very much because OMG politics! I suck so much at that! But the publicity prof hinted that it might be good for our future career to go to this evenings to meet people. Yeah, me and meeting people.So I was already trying to get away after the discussion ended (which, btw, was incredible cool and there were people who said exactly the kind of things I'm usually quietly thinking and that's totally encouraging) and I realized there would be a party afterwards but then the publicity prof was standing in front of me asked me about my paper and I said I couldn't find any literature and he said, well, why don't I go and talk to the guy who was talking about the internet during the discussion. And I was like OMG what should I say?So, despite me feeling really panicky and uncomfortable I went and talked to him and it was like OMG! I described my ideas for research projects and he was like OMG! That's totally cool! You need to do that! I started easy by mentioning the influence the internet has on what we read/watch and he totally agreed with me. And then I went on to fan interaction. "Have you by any chance ever heard of Neil Gaiman ?" "I made his German webpage." I really need to stop squeeing at people in real life because that's bad manners but he didn't seem to mind. As a matter of fact, he offered me an internship. But it's in Berlin and I don't really have the money for something like that! *cries* Also, you know what this all means? I'm so not going to waste this on a regular research paper. I think, I've got a master thesis project (and the third semester has only started!), because there's no big research whatsoever on this (he said there was some, but it's from people who have no idea whatsoever what it's really like) and OMG do you have any idea how this is exactly what I wanted to do when I chose this course of studies? It's like all the doubts and angst are gone. Only for this evening, but that's cool enough. I'm motivated, baby, so you better all stay out of my way or I'll hug you to death! Screw petty self-doubting and angst, I'm so going to rock!

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četvrtak, 08.10.2009.

museum rant

Saw Taming of the Shrew as a ballet. Had the prettiest costumes ever and Katharina was hot.Excursion yesterday left me quite exhausted. Prof is cute but also totally insane. Or hyperactive. Or on too much stims. His favorite phrase seems to be "damned lovely" and he's totally squee-y when you let him talk about something that interests him. And he doesn't seem to care very much about the less important details of life, like say, loosing his students while running through the streets.We went to the Industrial Museum Chemnitz. Hated it. The permanent exhibtion was still somewhat okay, but the special exhibition... I just hate this over-blown hyper extra super exhibitions which lack structure as well as real information. Don't get me wrong, I think inter-active elements and stuff are a great thing. But not if it's all there is.It's really ironic given how the museum guy was venting on how he hates events as well as preachiness before the tour. The museum is full with it. It's shrill and oh so cool and who needs text and background information anyway? And the preachiness of the special exhib made me want to smash stuff and hit someone. Whoever thought of that money-wasting sensational simplistic biased kind of crap? Ah yes, that would be Greenpeace. Maybe it's just me, but if I go to a museum, I want to get something sound and substantial. I guess I'm just too old-fashioned in this regard. How dare I value objectivity and real learning more than cheap shocks and entertainment!(On a positive note, the Villa Esche is definitely worth a visit if you're into Jugendstil and the work of van de Velde)

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utorak, 06.10.2009.

Before going to bed (I've got an excursion tomorrow starting at 7

Before going to bed (I've got an excursion tomorrow starting at 7:45, yay), let me be just a tiny little bit immature.You know, until now I was still keeping the feeble hope up, that this show will make sense. Some day. But now I can finally let go.Seriously, WTF!? Don't tell me this was planned or serves some grand plan. If it does, I'll be happy to be wrong. To me it came across as a cheap shock-value gimmick death. With no damned reason at all. It just makes so sense whatsoever on a story-telling level. Also, I was just starting to like Shannon. Damned.On a positive note: no Kate and (almost) no Jack. Well, I hope Jack will keep on going on the slightly crazy road because isn't he much more fun when he's almost breaking down?Also, yay for the (clinical) psychologist just because.Also, I've been very subtle concerning Christmas presents this year. I shoved a "Go for Beginners" books into the hands of my parents and I also very cunningly remarked that I've started building an iTunes library but don't have an iPod and isn't that just sad?

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nedjelja, 04.10.2009.

a (university related) problem...

So I really really need to write a research paper this semester. And I have two options.Option 1. The Enlightenment seminar. Topic would be secret societies. Anything about secret societies during the Enlightenment. Or anything else actually, as long as it's about the Enlightenment. BUT. Work group. The report would get made together with a work group. The thing is, after my first semester, I actually stopped making any effort to get to know my fellow students. That's the moment when I could go into a lengthy whiny "explanation" but I'll spare you. The point is, I would have to work together with people I don't know and probably don't even want to know because I'm "anti-social" like that. But sooner or later I will have to do something about that.Extra negative point: super crowded seminar and the prof has almost no time whatsoever to help you with your work.Option 2. The publicity seminar. Very small seminar. Last week 6 students were there. No work group because there's no group to work with. Total support by prof because he's got like 4 students or so writing their research paper about his seminar. But very restrictive in topic. And not so much literature either. Could still write about secret societies, though, if I focus on the contrast between "official" Enlightenment goals versus organization in secret societies.Option 2 would mean better "education" and more safety and I would actually learn how to write those papers the right way. It would be the academic right thing to do.Option 1 is really ugly for me on a personal level and would thus be the right thing to do on a personal level. I will have to learn to deal with this and better sooner than later. I really need to learn how to just deal with people.I have half a mind to do both. I mean, I won't write two papers because that would be stupid as I can only get one certificate for one of them. But maybe I'll just sign up for the report, which will gain me nothing but personal experience and I can still slip out if it's too much. Gah, I wish I had thought of writing my paper in the publicity seminar earlier.ETA: Or I could just get myself a totally different topic for the publicity seminar. Like the middle ages but that could be a problem because technically it's too late since the report would be due this Thursday. Or I could write about the internet. Now, THAT would be cool. *goes literature researching*ETA2: Okay, since I will be writing my paper in the Publicity seminar, I need a topic concerning publicity. So far I've been thinking about something like that:1. "publicity" during the Middle Ages (obviously needs specification)2. the Enlightenment versus secret societies3. something about Jrgen Habermas (sociology crossover!)4. the internet (obviously needs even more specification)I just took a 2 options choice and made into at least 4 options. *headdesk*

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petak, 02.10.2009.

stuff

Saw The Magic Flute. Must be getting older and crankier because I didn't like it that much. It's the meta that's irking me. Shouldn't think about it too much. Local production better in the end than I was willing to give it credit for after the first half. A tad too subtle and tame for my liking. But anti-Sarastro if I'm not mistaking. I liked that. Also, Papageno is the only reasonable and sane character in the whole opera.Decided to have a tourist day today because yay traveling! Only made it to Halle, though. Pretty little town but stupid folk festival made me flee the old part of town before I could get a good look at the buildings. Went to see Beckmann exhibition in the Moritzburg. Like Beckmann, but got very distracted by Renaissance rooms. Made me feel very at home.Then went to the Saladin and the Crusaders exhibition, which could use a bit more structuring, imo. Still, reminded me of my new found strong history love. Am also developing very strong feeling of being in the wrong course of studies.

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