vesnyinka diary

ponedjeljak, 31.08.2009.

XXXHOLiC progress

XXXHOLiC progress: 10/26 discs burned. My dvd burner is going to hate me forever after this. To that I say - tough shit.Right now I'm working up the courage to call the credit card company. Wrote out what to say. Am now feeling sick to my stomach with anxiety. I guess the anxiety must spring from the fact that a lot of this is my fault - unlike with the insurance fiasco (which was this time last year, incidentally), where I KNEW I was being screwed over, and wasn't afraid to give them shit. (at least after I got on the phone - actually getting on the phone is always the hard part.)Am decidedly hiding this whole thing from my parents.Weird coincidence of the week: My friend who recently moved to Maryland . . . her dad is in my digital photography class. So random. Okay, now I'm just stalling.

subota, 29.08.2009.

MEMERY

Choose up to 20 people from your friends list. Post a picture of a fictional character that reminds you of each person. It can be based on looks, personality, or what that person likes, or just an abstract association. Have your friends list attempt to guess themselves and others.Just to save trouble, these are the following 20 people: _daffodils, onthefloor, seisei_ftw, mari_yagami, threefrog, the_asalina, chzbrgr_of_doom, whitereflection, pixxers, tatsuta_hime, rachia, finnigan_geist, minkyleigh, annaoni, elyndys, storyteller, tiny_sparks, post_position, goosuke, feuillu.SengokuKamiho elyndysLEd the_asalinaIsshin chzbrgr_of_doom (guessed by post_position)Sakura annaoniHakkai whitereflectionRock Lee finnigan_geistSoubiHaguKira _daffodilsOkitaShigureShishido minkyleighJuri mari_yagamiOsaka feuilluGin storytellerKite pixxers (guessed by minkyleigh)SubaruHanatarou tatsuta_hime

četvrtak, 27.08.2009.

So the past few days I've been a combination of dead tired

So the past few days I've been a combination of dead tired, sick, menstruating, and generally angry at the world for various reasons, not the least of which is getting the unofficial axe at work. Posts will just be bitter, whiny emo, the kind I regret making a day or two later, so I'm just going to keep to myself for a while until the mood lifts. I also realized the other day that I quite officially have no close friends in real life anymore, which has left me feeling more lonely than I've felt in years.So I'm out for a bit. Keep safe and don't take any candy from strangers, guys.

četvrtak, 13.08.2009.

Pointless Post #2,903

Some things that make me LOL:- japanese mascots (like Rerakusu Bear)- the "uke" pin that pixxers sent me- grammar wank. ("It's not 'Well hung'. It's hanged.") *dies*- people who think commenting anonymously with your honest opinion is being a coward. It's actually more like being socially-conscientious. - grown men making panties jokes (long story)- Momo-chan-sempai = Hirako? LMFAO- this story- running into a wall of pillows and then having my 5 year-old nephew tell me I have "good form."Things that don't make me LOL:- the massive glop of spaghetti sauce I just spilled on my shirt- working 3 to midnight then having to get up at 6 for a 9-hour shift the next day- having to do the same thing tomorrow and monday- headaches that won't go awayADD TO THE LISTS PLZ.and HELLO to all the random people who've friended me in the past week. (All 13 of you!) I'm not really sure what I did recently that was so awesome, but hello and welcome. Now, I will go do an extensive comb-through of your journals and profiles to see if you're worthy of being friended back.Just kidding, I added you all. I'm not *quite* that much of a stuck-up bitch. also: RE: A Game of Thrones: I. Absolutely. Can. Not. Put. This. Book. DOWN. X____X

ponedjeljak, 10.08.2009.

for personal reference

Cool Stuff Read at least three novels each month January: The Assassin King - finished | Good Omens - in progress just finished XD | A Game of Thrones February: Assassin's Apprentice | Luck in the Shadows | --- Fandom: 3 fics per month try writing new pairing or fandom for 1 out of these three write another long fic (sequel to DoSE, possibly? . . . will undoubtedly be IchiIshi either way) finish compiling IchiIshi fic list (*shudders at the prospect of coding a hundred or so fics*) ** finish IchiIshi fanart site list ** be a better Kantoku at dork_love_scans ~ Scan more dj. (No. Really.) Assign unfinished projects. Kick out the couple of people working on stuff who won't return my emails and reassign their projects. Possibly employ cleaners, instead of having editors do all the work? New journal layout. Still gonna be pink, though. Begin recompiling a graphic design portfolio? Hmm . . . maybe wait to see how this semester works out. Make that god damned website for crying out loud. T_T ** Start posting at loligasm again, even if it is just stupid shit.(** = may need to employ help for these. In exchange for porn maybe?) Not-so-cool Stuff Get motherfucking teeth fixed and DONE. Pay off one credit card ($400 one) Get major credit card balance below $4k Possibly get better paying job. :/



ETA: It's official: the rich text editor in the new update page is absolute shit.

subota, 08.08.2009.

PSA

PSA: NEW YEAR = NEW AIM SCREEN NAME: button h8erHABEEB IT. Maybe I can resume actually being on some of the time. I DUNNO, THOUGH. WE'LL HAVE TO SEE.I really need to rid myself of the urbeth handle. Every once in a while, someone I don't want to finds me. (not on el-jay though, thankfully.)Today I received Polish greetings, a package of Britain, and a package of LOLs, from perfectassassin, elyndys, and pixxers, respectively. I LOVE YOU GUYS, VERY SERIOUS.THAT IS ALL. /is lameETA CUZ IT'S FUNNY: U.S. on Saddam: "Would have done it differently"Well yes, we would have; we would have dragged the trial out for 10+ years and spent millions of dollars on litigation. And who knows if he would've even been found guilty in the end; just look at O.J., fer chrissakes.I need a Saddam icon that says "How's it hanging?" now. :(

petak, 07.08.2009.

OMFG FIC FOR ME

You guys need to go read this right the fuck now. (Well, if you're not opposed to incest or kink.) Holy Christ. I don't care if you don't know Bleach. READ IT.and after you've regained your shredded bits of brain, you should go read this, because it's utterly beautiful.*PREENS*

srijeda, 05.08.2009.

Dirty

Porn for onthefloor, because she deserves it. ♥Title: DirtyFandom: BleachPairing: Kurosaki Ichigo/Ishida UryuuRating: NC-17Summary: pornThis was what he lived for. All of this. Every shaky breath, every muffled moan, every smooth, intoxicating inch of skin. His feel, his scent, the breathtaking sight of him on his knees, back curved in a perfect arch, hair fanned across the pillow where his face was buried.Everyone had their obsessions, their little kinks. Ishida, for instance, was utterly infatuated with his muscles. Ichigo loved that hungry, excited spark in his eyes whenever he indulged him, lying prostrate and flexing each muscle as Ishida crawled over him, fawning over every tendon with hot lips and a hotter tongue. He knew this feeling, now; it was the feeling of being worshipped.Worship. It was a concept he barely thought about before he made Ishida his and his alone. Now he felt it in every fiber of his body, could smell it, a heady and strong scent, on the air.Hed been thinking about it, one sunny day. Dating. Girls. Sex. Love. He thought about it like hed never thought about it before in his life. (And truthfully, to some extent, he hadnt.) He wanted to know what he liked, what made him tick. He thought he might be bi. Or not. Was it important? Ichigo decided that he wasnt attracted to gender. He was attracted to beauty, a certain type of sexiness in appearance and personality.And that day was the very same day he realized that Ishida Uryuu was exactly his type. Too caught up in his thoughts to give a damn about what he was doing, Ichigo had stared blatantly as Ishida changed his shorts for P.E., and suddenly wondered what it would be like to push Ishida up against the locker, tear off his tight, white briefs, and rub his cock in between the taut cheeks of his ass. It would be pretty damn awesome, if his immediate erection had anything to say about it. And so, also on that day, Ichigo had fallen in love point blank with Ishidas small, round, white, sexy as hell behind. It wasnt until later that he fell in love with the owner of said behind.Hence, Ichigos obsession; Ishidas perfect ass, which he worshipped often and quite fervently.He hadnt even taken off his uniform yet. Hed been daydreaming about it during class all day; this very sight before him. When he first learned about anal sex, his immediate reaction was a slight revulsion. Wasnt that dirty? Ishida was anything but dirty, though. Ichigo suspected that due to his little obsession, Ishida had taken on a rather thorough routine of keeping himself clean, perfect, ready. Ichigo secretly loved that prim and proper attitude about him, like he could make the world a better place if only he kept the table clean and the bookshelf organized and the split-ends trimmed. Like how he kept lube in the most convenient of places, how he always had a spare set of sheets ready, how he put the radio on in the bathroom to hopefully drown out any stray noises the elderly couple living next door might hear.Because Ichigo did so love to hear Ishida make noise.Ishida raised his head from the pillow for a moment to catch a breath, and gave a sexy whimper as Ichigos thumb rubbed over his asshole. A second later and he felt Ichigos breath there, and he quickly hid his face against the pillow once again.Not that he was embarrassed; with the number of times Ichigo had done this to him, hed gotten over that long ago. No, Ichigo knew, he spread that sweet ass for him without a single shred of shame, and Ichigo, glutton that he was, loved him for it. Ishida just knew what was coming, and didnt want to be caught off guard singing Ichigos name at the top of his lungs. Ichigo had teased him up to this point, trailing kisses up his thighs, biting softly at the smooth cheeks, darting his tongue out to lick a tortuously light path along his cock. Ishida's cock hung down heavy between his legs, swollen with arousal, almost close enough for the tip to rub against the bed sheets. Ichigo caught a drop of precome with his finger and tasted it, moaning at that bitter taste he loved so much, inhaling the sweet smell of his lovers sex. It tasted good.He wanted more.He got on his knees and gripped the cheeks of Ishidas ass, placing a soft, sweet kiss on each one. Ishidas hands fisted in the pillow. Ichigo breathed hot, moist air onto him and spread him apart even more, breathing that same air into him. Ishida quivered expectantly beneath his lips. Ichigo shivered and gave in to what they both wanted.Oh. Oh. Oh, was what Ichigo would have heard, had the pillow not been there. Ichigos tongue flitted out experimentally, then licked, then swirled, then prodded open, then penetrated. Hed become good at this; months worth of attentive practice did that. Ishida struggled to keep his hips still as Ichigo delivered the sweetest, naughtiest of pleasures to his hole, hot and wet and so, so good. Ichigo grew hungrier at the feeling of Ishida twitching around him, opening up for him invitingly, telling him what he wanted without words. Ichigo gripped his hips firmly as he tongue-fucked him, loving the feel of that hot passage around him, the way it trembled and tightened and loosened. He loved it; they both loved it.Ichigo let go his grip on Ishidas hips, silently inviting Ishida to fuck himself on his tongue. Ishida did so with shallow but swift thrusts of his hips, taking the warm, wet appendage into him, growing agonizingly hard as his cock swung back and forth beneath him.Ichigo licked a trail over his balls to the tip of his cock and back up. He ate him out some more, indulging, closing his lips around his tongue and sucking. Ishida opened more and more, and soon, Ichigos fingers found their way there as well, poking and prodding into him gently, then a bit more firmly. Two index fingers stretched him and held him open, and Ichigo entered him with tongue and fingers at the same time.By now, Ishida was sobbing into his pillow with both frustration and bliss. The forming mantra of take me, take me, fuck me, fuck me, would have been incoherent cries to anyone else, but Ichigo had learned to correctly interpret his pillowspeak some time ago.He indulged in his most favorite and dirtiest of obsessions for a few minutes more, though.When he felt Ishida begin to shudder so hard it was clear he was having a hard time holding himself back, Ichigo relented, giving a final, almost-sweet kiss to his hole before standing up and removing his clothes as fast as possible. He heard a rip or two, but didnt pay any mind. Chances were that even in his state of tortured arousal, Ishida heard it too, and would sew it up for him later.They both had much more pressing matters to attend to right now. Much more pressing needs.Ichigo only bothered with the smallest bit of lube; he knew Ishida was not only loose enough by now, but nice and slippery as well. Ishida pushed his hips up even higher, straining his back. Ichigo ran a soothing hand down his long, smooth back to relax him, and pressed the head of his cock against Ishidas asshole. Ishida trembled with both relief and unbearable need.Ichigo entered him carefully, and fit inside quickly and easily. Which wasnt to say that Ishida was actually loose; even when he was loose in the sense that Ichigo could take him without any pain, he still felt amazingly and wonderfully tight.Ichigos stamina had become rather sturdy over the past months. Even though he felt like he was about to burst the moment he slid inside, he held out for a satisfying length of time. He fucked him slow, then fast, gentle, then hard enough to slam the bed up against the wall. He pulled out all the way and pushed in, moaning at the sight of Ishidas stretched-open ass each time.Ishida came soon after Ichigo entered him, without even touching himself. Ichigo wanted more, and continued on relentlessly, alternately rocking and slamming into him. Ishida knew he wouldnt give in until he came again; he reached down with a shaky hand and began pumping his cock in earnest. Ishida tightened mercilessly around him when he came the second time, and Ichigo threw his head back at the sensation. Sweat dripped down his body in heavy drops; hed been fucking him for almost twenty minutes now, and loving every damn second of it. The muscles of his thighs and buttocks were burning with continued exercise; he could only imagine what Ishida must be feeling, stuck in that position for a good half hour.He placed a foot on the bed and angled into him just how he liked it, as hard and as fast as he was capable in his quickly-tiring state. He looked down and saw Ishidas face turned, finally visible against the pillow, eyelids droopy and expression utterly satisfied. Ichigo admired the pretty flush of his cheeks, the long, elegant slope of his nose and the way it turned up ever-so-slightly at the tip, the luscious line of his beautiful lips. He grew closer to orgasm while musing on his lovers pretty face. Ishida was pretty and sexy all over, from his lips to his toes to his perfect, perfect ass. Ichigo thrusted wildly into his ass deep and hard and tight, and he knew he was going to come. He pulled out, as gently as possible, stroked himself furiously, and loosened his load all over the ass he worshipped so much. Catching his breath and trying not to fall forward, he came down from an unbelievable high rubbing his dick messily through the come decorating Ishidas smooth and now-a-bit-reddened cheeks.So. So good, Ichigo panted out between heavy breaths. Ishida didnt answer, just looked up at him through sleepy eyes and gave a rare, soft smile. Ichigo laid down carefully next to him and helped him move out of that position into a more comfortable one. Ishida grimaced at the feeling of their come smearing everywhere, but hadnt quite regained the energy to do anything about it just yet.They laid together in a dizzy afterglow, the kind that only occurred after the most intense sex they were capable of. Both felt giddy as they regained their breath and the pain of exertion faded away. Ichigo as a general rule became very affectionate - even cuddly - after sex, and the more mind-blowing the sex, the more touchy-feely-mushy he got. He held Ishida close and kissed him over and over, anywhere his mouth could reach, all the time wearing a silly smile on his face.After a while, Ishidas sense began to return, and the need to clean themselves up became almost overwhelming. He went to get up, but was held fast by Ichigo.Come on, Ichigo. Were filthy, Ishida said amiably, long-used to Ichigos clingy post-orgasm behavior.Ichigo grinned against his side and continued kissing him stubbornly. Yes. Yes we are, he said between kisses. Id say were downright nasty. A hand snuck low and slid gently over Ishidas soft penis.Ishida tried not to laugh at the double entendre. He also tried not to be further aroused. Neither worked.~FIN~-------Damn, it's been a while since I wrote porn. D: I think the last time was Kat's birthday. WTF THAT'S OVER A MONTH AGO. ( )

utorak, 04.08.2009.

2005 - A Yearful of Perviness

[emo moment] Sometimes, I feel that liking Bekami is the fandom equivalent of walking around with a nice, bright, scarlet letter sewn onto the front of my shirt. But perhaps I'm just being dramatic. [/emo moment]Bored again. Got that nostalgic, end-of-the-year feeling that makes me want to look at what I've "accomplished." Lifewise, this is incredibly depressing. But on the flipside, I realize that I've written a ton - and I do mean A TON - of fanfic this past year. Just look at these numbers:9 Gundam Seed/Destiny fics [2 of which were posted in two parts, and 1 in five parts]1 Fafner fic1 Yami fic1 One Piece fica couple other-fandom drabbleswhich is nothing compared to the tenipuri fic, of course.1 thirty-part fic [Quick Bright Things] (well, it will be thirty parts by Dec.31st :P)1 ten-part fic [All Things Signified]1 as-yet-unfinished six-part fic [H-Men] (er, I swear I'll get around to finishing that someday. Really.)10 Yummi lemons3 deathfics for 30_kills14 requested crackfics10 individual ficlets and9 individual oneshots (the difference between a ficlet and a oneshot to me, btw, is that a ficlet is anything *approximately* under 1,000 words.)That is 63 individual works of fanfiction, posted in approximately 113 parts. That's a helluva lotta fanfic. 0__0Now, I could take this negatively as proof that I have no life, but I'm going to ignore that nagging feeling and take pride in the amount of work I've spewed out. Sure, some of it really isn't that great, even by my own lower-than-average standards. But looking back over a lot of it (yes, I'm truly that bored), I have to say I'm really proud, or at least satisfied with a pretty good chunk of it.In an attempt to either cheer myself up, be self-serving, or just cure my own boredom, I've picked out ten of my favorites.Gundam Seed/Destiny+ Videotape ~ Part One || Part Two --- this is one of those things where I honestly have no idea where it even came from. I sat down at my compy with the intent of writing a druggie threesome, and I ended up writing this entire story in one sitting. Not that this doesn't happen fairly often, but it generally never comes out this original. I'm really proud of it, possibly above anything else I've written this year, because it's just so, how should I put it... dead-on? It somehow manages to be simultaneously "canon", while still being twisted and perverted.+ Of Air and Spaces --- The title kinda sucks, but other than that, I don't see much cause for complaint. XD My first seed fic, which rather set the trend for the rest of my seed fic to be overly-analytical and introspective. I've always felt the most affinity with Athrun of all characters in Seed (in terms of understanding how he feels and why he does what he does), and I think I dealt him a fair, subjective hand with this piece, and I really love the imagery in the second half.+ The Tree of the Knowing of Good and Evil --- I actually didn't like this so much after I first wrote it, but now that I look at it, I'm very pleased with the overall effect. I think I'm most struck by my choice of words I guess . . . how the Eden metaphor worked in, and the little snippets of dialogue . . . I don't know how I did it, but it just works. (on a side note, my jaw almost unhinged at the beginning of Final Phase Plus when Rau's voice came on and started discussing original sin. I kept thinking, "I thought of that analogy first! No fair!" XDDD)Tenipuri+ Crackfic Request #4, or the Lt.Oishi/Cpt.Atobe in 17th-century British Navy piece. XDD --- I think the main reason I love this fic so much is the pickup lines. I also remember this fic totally taking over the entirety of my brain for a good two straight days, and it's a strangely fond memory.+ Crackfic Request #13, or the Niou/Shinji piece. --- This one is just funny. I think it might be the funniest thing I've ever written, to be totally honest. I should try writing a Niou POV again sometime.+ A Wind to Wake Us --- I was rather disappointed at the lack of feedback I received on this. I'm guessing it's because people tend to steer away from crack pairings. But this was an idea that suddenly bit me in the ass one day, and I spent a good three days writing it out and going over it meticulously. I think structure makes it stand out the most, but I also like the anecdotal scenes, as they're very original.+ Just One Look --- Because. SumiZuka FOREVA BABY. It's brain-breaking, boner-reducing, OTP fun! 8D+ Vitamins --- part of Quick Bright Things, but can act as a standalone, this was my favorite chapter by far. I think I totally nailed the characterization for both boys in this one, which isn't something I generally feel I can say about any of my fics. XD+ And then there was one --- 1st place in 30_kills' Midsummer's Nightmare contest! But no, I'm actually not mentioning it solely to gloat, I'm actually very pleased with this piece. It has its faults (like the blatant enforcing of OTPs *cough*), but I really like how the overall mood came out. Never thought I could pull off horror, and while it's not spine-tinglingly scary or anything, it has a definite creepy feel to it.+ Veni, Vidi, Vici --- Because I had to put at least one of my Yummi lemons in here! And I think this is my favorite, for its sheer randomness. We'll conveniently forget about that great big mistake in the title I made when posting it thank you. And the whole Mizuki-buying-his-own-harem as an amusing parallel to how he recruits players in the series. He's a collector, dammit! A connoisseur! xDDAnd I was going to make a list of my least favorite fics as well, but this endeavor has already exhausted me. Perhaps another day, I'll garner the energy to mock myself. ;D

subota, 01.08.2009.

Porn, Porn, craaaack, Porn

I'm trying to write up a "year in fic" thing like I did last year, and it's all so very . . . one-sided, I guess? It's one of the things I can say about when I was active in Tenipuri: I would write pretty much any pairing. Almost nothing squicked me, and I was always up for a challenge. With Bleach, I'm so narrow. IchiIshi. If not, Quincest. Possibly Isshin/Ryuuken, Byakuya/Renji, and a couple Isshin/Uryuu for shits and giggles. Where did my diversity go? My fascination with crack pairings?It's kinda sad, but honestly, I still think my Bleach fic is the best I've done so far. And my favorites are definitely the IchiIshi. (well, not all of them.)But anyway. Yeah. Year in fic. A lot of this is going to come off as incredibly pretentious; me and my ego have a good, strong relationship.. . . not a whole lot compared to last year, but I think, on the whole, I've improved a lot. Quality > quantity? :D;;I wrote:Bleach1 five-chaptered miniepic1 trilogy (that included two bonus omakes XD)17 complete fics, one of which was 2 chapters2 incomplete mutlichapters (1/2 and 1/4)14 drabbles for the requests I did early in the year, and 5 for the more recentPrince of Tennis1 three-part fic14 complete fics1 silly little drabbleFor other series, I did 1 Saiyuki fic, 1 Gundam Seed fic, 2 Gintama fics, and 1 Air Gear fic.= a total of 59 fics. Right? >.>My favorites:~Bleach~The Killing Moon, first in the Moon Trilogy. It was rather, shall I say, "ego-inflating" as the following week the comms began getting overrun with hollow!Ichigo fics. I still remember the utter glee that I felt when the idea for this fic struck me. "I've never seen *that* before!"Dreaming of Skies Elsewhere. I hate calling things "my baby," because it's kinda sickly-sweet, but well, this is my baby. XD I loved writing it, I loved editing it (no, really, I did), I loved posting and getting reviews, and I love going back and rereading it - which I've done probably a dozen times. This fic is Ichigo/Ishida to me; it encapsulates everything I love about the pairing, the characters, even the series. I also really, really loved working closely with semecucumber on this; we have a wonderful artistic bond. ♥I Consume. I like the subtlety in this one. Because it's so blatant. Which makes no sense, but whatever.When the Sun Goes Out. My favorite IchiIshi besides DoSE. I'd like to try the style again, with a series of scenes all set some time apart.Cold Hands, Warm Heart, utter waff, but upon rereading it, I actually like it quite a bit.Feverish. Mmmm, this one was fun to write. My favorite of all the Quincest filth, and I think the most believable.Alms. I like my other ByaRen one as well, but I think this came out better. I have to say, this pairing takes a lot out of me when I'm writing it. The Shadow, because I really do love hollow!Ichigo. ~Prince of Tennis~A Devil to Pay. A lot of thought, work, and time. It was actually one of the first things I wrote where I felt "this is wonderful and exactly right." I finally gave Mizuki the justice he had so-longed deserved.Please Teacher, because dammit, Mizuki-sensei is hotter than jalapenos.Akuchu, because it's funny.Broken Chord, because it's Bekami, and because it's hot.Lessons in Dynamics is funny as well, I think.--------I'll catch up on comments tomorrow. I have to write porn tonight. *rolls up sleeves*and I can't think of an appropriately witty way to end this post. I'M LOSING MY TOUCH. D:oh wait, now I remember:THAT IS ALL.

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