goodbye madrid
05.08.2006., subota
its been a while
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well a couple days ago i wrote this really long blog and then something got messed up, like my line broke or something (they dont consider telephone lines a priority here on the island i guess) so it all disappeared and i was too pissed to re-write it so i dont have a clue what it was about :) soon, time to be saying goodbye again. i will never get used to it, but it gets easier with practice. i dont know, right now, im sick of the beach, its just me and my cousin left here and im bored of it all. i havent even entered the water the past three days. the summer has been nice, though, relaxing. there is nothing quite like home. st louis again in just days. the summer seems too long and too short at the same time. its a little crazy, how when u have 3 months to think about ur life, all the pieces fall into place, and u see it oh-so-much clearer than you ever could with other shit on ur mind. i mean, the biggest problems i face here are weather-related. so i have time to think about shit. i guess the same happens to everyone else facing some sort of problem/decision (this includes people that are a part of my problem/decision). i wish i could say all this thinking brought me to a constructive plan for the future but unfortunately it is impossible to plan anything ahead. i just know im getting ready for a really hard time. im charging my batteries, because im about to face a tough fight with myself...whatever everyone else involved decides. im usually so weak but i cant afford it this time. its time to stand up for myself, even if it means going through some tough shit. one day, i will laugh at it all. hopefully, one day soon :) |