she s too young

(related: mike conley sr, )

So. Im home sick, and I made the mistake of watching Dr. Phil.

The show had nothing to do with adoption. It was light-hearted, really. The theme was What Would Robin Do? Dr. Phils wife, Robin, was on the stage, giving advice to women with problems. Problems like&.well, one woman being unable to forgive a husband for shoving wedding cake in her face 18 years earlier. Another woman was a total doormat, the ultimate people-pleaser, and never stood up for herself.

It was mildly funny.

Then& at the very end& Robin says, And now I want to introduce someone to you. She is so inspiring, I knew when barron hilton her letter that I had to meet her.

This woman apparently has no problems, shes just a success story Robin wants to share with the audience.

Anyway. Said woman was diagnosed with breast cancer at a young age. She went through a double mastectomy and reconstructive surgery, and survived, all with a gracious spirit. Shortly after the surgery, her body started changing. She thought she was pregnant. The doctors told she s too young no, she was in menopause.

Woman and her husband are devastated. Theyve always wanted children, and now they cant have them.

BUT& she is determined. She WILL be a mommy, one way or another. So she decides to adopt.

Now she is glad she had breast cancer and went through early menopause, because she learned so much and has her child, etc. etc.

I have no problem with any of this. Really. Im kind of going, Sheesh, cant I get away from adoption EVER? in my mind, because after all this show wasnt supposed to be adoption related, but oh well. Such is life.

BUT. THEN.

Robin commends the woman on her strength she s too young courage. And then she says, And what I especially love is that you decided youd be a mom no matter what, and you adopted. That is so wonderful of you. (Paraphrase.)

Okay& Im sorry& but WHY is that commendable? This woman wanted kids; she couldnt have any biologically; so she took the next obvious route. HELLO!

Well, forgive me if I dont stand and applaud. I dont see anything heroic or saint-like about adopting a child. And Id be willing to bet the kid doesnt see anything heroic about it, either.