I don't want to sleep, because I don't feel like waking up to another listless day.
I wish to stay awake forever, so I wouldn't dream up those days, those happy days that never took place and never will.
I'm eating corn. Brings back silly childhood memories. Makes me wanna be a child once again.
Do you remember the freedom and carelessness? Do you remember when we ran across that green meadow, oblivious of the world, aware only of the dew that clung to our bare feet? Do you remember the taste of air, salted with the breeze blowing gently from the beach, just a few miles from where we used to live?
I don't. We never had that, and we never will. Sounds nice though. You would fit perfectly into my simple vision of days that never happened. Damn, you really would have fitted nicely into my world before I have broken down, when I still resembled a human being capable of living.
And now, I just want to dance. I want to dance to the silent music until my feet feel sore; until I fall on my knees into the fine sand of that non-existent beach.
Still, I don't feel like sleeping. I don't feel like dreaming, but I can't seem to stop. I can't stop conjuring these happy images in my head. I want to be free.
I don't want to wake up and spend another day surviving, trying to keep my head together. I want peace. I am so sick of looking for that thing that will make me happy, that will help me get by, through to get...oh, choose a preposition.
I'm so tired. So very tired.
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