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this is pathetic and sardonic...it's sadistic and psyhotic...

{D}arkness is my home..
{E}vil.. so what?
{A}ngel.. yes, but dark..
{T}ake me away..
{H}ate me if you want..

***Ja nisam anđeo kako se tebi čini, ja samo iskorištavam tvoje mane...Izvini!! Mene su stvorili đavoli i grlile hladne kiše, za mene je ljubav samo tren i ništa više...***

wpe44779

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{aNgeL wiThouT wiNgS}
look deep into her eyes for a second..she's cute with a biiiig smile on her face,her laughs are happy...she's every happy..but can't you see she's sometimes broken inside?..then her smiles are few & her laughs are rare. she pretends to be happy & she pretends to have fun. she's got the love of her life but she can't help but think of what it will be without him..she can't even bear the thought of going through that. she's self conscious & can't seem to shake the empty black thoughts from her mind..she doesn't know who she is & she doesn't know who she wants to be..she loves music & art & her friends.but is that love really enough to keep her sane? nobody knows, nobody even cares. nobody can even tell this is how she feels.'how she's felt..so where's she gonna be in a week? a month? a year? do you honestly see her living,laughing and smiling with you, or sleeping in the hole she dug herself when no one was watching? she sees things no one else sees..she thinks things no one would ever even imagine..she has everything, but to her it feels like nothing..she walks..now..she's lost, and she can't find her way..this girl needs help but help can't ever seem to find it's way through the dark, deadly abyss they call her perfect life...
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gLavNi i sPoRedNi LikOvi
Streber- ehh..u mene je zaljubljen..trebalo bi da sam i ja u njega,al' nikad to ne priznam..ustvari
ne znam jesam li..KOMPLIKOVANO!!!
A - the best friend for me..on the world..
B - moja naaajludja frendica..the best
Ady,F,Viky,E1 i E2 - osobe koje su za mene na samom dnu..to sam TEK uvidila neki dan..Mada
Ady je bolja od njih..Ady,E1 i E2 su pukle u Strebera..haaha
J - dobra frendica..uvijek je onde gdje treba,samo sto one gore klinke hoce da i nju ubace u njih..
V - osoba koja me najvise razocarala..super mi je friend bio..al' who cut his hair!
E - tako mala,a tako zna covjeka umiriti..Streberova seka..tako mi je draga..duplo je mladja od mene,al' ima bolest da se ponasa kao duplo starija..tako da je super mala:)
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..aj em,aj em..Jenny..
eff..moram se predstavit:X shit..mrzim to..well my name is Jenny..nemam vam nish posebno pisat..looda sam do bola,belay mi je non-stop u glavi..volim muziku,rukomet,fudbal(Bayern,Werder,Valencia i Velez),kompich,mobach,crtati,vristati:),sarati po stvarima i klupama,volim moje starke,vansice..Volim Ballacka,Kahna i Villu!Volim zimu,maj i januar..Pored snijega,uvijek me zapadne nova ljubav u januaru..uvijek!hmm...sta jos reci?Slusam sve - rock,punk,metal,domace...Iz dana u dan čini mi se sve više sam darkerica,kući samo slušam rock u posljednje vrijeme i crno crtam..heeehe...pjesme koje žestoko volim su "Sanjam" by C.Jabuka,"Unforgiven" by Metallica,"Goodnight" by Dry Kill Logic,"Dobro mi dosli" by Skroz,svaka pjesma od Tonya Cetinskog,pjesme od Đoleta,"Svetinja" by Škoro,"Somebody Told Me" by The Killers,"Nigdi Mira Nimam" by Lvdy...i ne mogu se sjetit vise..sry..zzoppam vas muahkiss

..xxx..
Ovdje nema valova
sunca ,bure, i splavova
čarolije zvjezdanih noći
lahor za dušu opijum za oči...

ovdje i pogled puno znači
svaki osmijeh ljubav zrači
jer smo sami u tuđini
izgubljeni u daljini...

zato cijeni svaki pogled
lijepu riječ i dragi osmijeh
jer smo sami u tuđini
izgubljeni u daljini...

ne želim pokazati da mi nedostaješ
iako svakim trenom dio mene postaješ
pravit ću se hrabra,hladna i kruta
a tako te osjećam ispod svojih skuta....

divljina će noćas teći kroz tvoje vene
gledat ćeš druge, a vidjeti mene
plesat ćeš prljavo,strastveno i sneno
al` srce tvoje za druge je nijemo...

ime mi je" promjena ", a prezime "tuga"....
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..4my friends..
Šta bih ja bez prijatelja,
što me dižu kada padam...
Šta bih ja bez prijatelja,
što se brinu da ne stradam!?!

Šta bih ja bez prijatelja ,
što osmijeh mi na lice vrate...
Šta bih bez tih Anđela
što kroz život me prate!?!
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..mali medo on the nebo..
Vracali smo se sa koncerta.Hrpa moje raje i ja isli smo pjeske.Svako 10-ak min. neko skrene drugim putem.Jedno po jedno..i ostanemo samo Streber i ja.Tu noc cu dobro zapamtiti..Gledali smo u nebo,hodajuci,i trazili zvijezdane znakove.Nakon uzaludnog trazenja,uzviknula sam: "Eno malog mede!"..Zacudio se jer ga nije mogao naci.Pokazala sam mu,jedva.Onda smo poceli traziti velikog medu.Ali nigdje ga..I ja kažem: "Hej pa mali medo je na sjeveru,jel' onda veliki prekoputa?" On se blago osmjehnuo.Rekao je: "Mala zalutala si,ondje je jug,ne sjever!"..Smijali smo se sve do moje kuce.Jedva smo se rastali tu vecer.Osjecala sam se sigurno,s nekim cudnim osjecajem.Cim sam dosla kuci,krenula sam u potraznju za velikim medom.I nasla sam ga!Jedva sam docekala da mu kazem..:) Ne znam kako i zasto,ali ta noc ce mi ostati u sjecanju dugo vremena..a Mali Medo ce me uvijek podsjecati na Strebera..:)
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..sitnica ipak..
U neke kasne sate
pomislim na tvoje ime,
jer samo ono nosi trag
tvog postojanja......
Ponekad me otme uzdah
zbog izgubljune ljubavi,
preboljene ljubavi,
malo zaboravljene....
Tvoj trag je jos samo u pjesmama
u ovim rijecima,
koje nikom nista ne znace.....
NI MENI....

za sve 'one' koji su mi bili vise nego dragi..ali bili su..nisu vise..
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..my malcice vazniji datumi..
06.05. - my birthday..
02.06. - A's birthday..
16.10. - B's birthday..
02.06. - Streber's birth..
07.01.2006. - upoznala se sa Vasom..u kontaktu smo bili 5-6 mjeseci..bleee
05.02.2006. - prvi sms od Vase..:)
03.06.2006. - otad vise Vasa mi nish ne znaci..
29.07.2006. - nikad zaboravljeni provod..
01.10.2006. - Streber mi prvi put 'malo' vise upao u pogled..i prvi sms..
22.12.2006. - 'ona' noc koju cu zapamtiti..(gore je opisana)
16.01.2007. 01:59h - Streber mi priznao da 12h u danu misli na mene

..neke stvarchice :X..

Katkad želiš,a želja ti nije ostvarena..
Katkad voliš,a ljubav ti nije uzvraćena..
Katkad ti se plače,a suze ne mogu poteći,
katkad ono što osjećaš poruke ne mogu izreći..


Kazu: od Redbula se dobijaju krila.Zato ti nikada necu dati da pijes Redbull,jer bi tada najsladji i najbolji andjeo sa ovoga svijeta odletio..:o)

Volim te i mrzim..ne znam što je jače..
stisnulo se srce..samo što ne plače..

Onaj koji te rasplakao nije vrijedan tvojih suza,a onaj ko te vrijedan neće te rasplakati!

Moje srce kao vatra gori,
diše za prijatelje koje voli..
Sad znam zašto Bog prijatelje stvori,
jer oni su nada dok sudbina boli..

Poruke koje je vrijedno ostaviti u sjecanju..



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petak, 05.01.2007.

XXX--->part of my life<---XXX

He gave me wings,and made me fly...
He touched my hand and I could touch the sky...
I lost my faith and He gave it back to me...
I said no star was out of reach...
He stood by me and I stood tall...
I had He's love I had it all...
I'm grateful for each day He gave me...
Maybe I don't know that much...
But I know this much is true...
I was blessed 'cause I was loved by He....
'Cause I'm loved by He...'Cause He love me now...
He loved me, he is loving me and he'll love me...
But what's the problem if he loves me,if I'm happy?
Our "love" began at October..
I don't know how but I felt that .. he loved me like the width of the sky...
He unbinded the rope of our love first..
Than he sent me messages and I too...
It was so sweet..His everybody word was sweet..
His smiles and his compliments..His jokes..
It made me happy..It made a big smile on my face..
Our mums befriend us..But they didn't know for our messages..
I thought: "They mustn't know all!!I'll do anything without mum.."
And yesterday his family came by me..by my family..
'Cause we are neighbours...
His mother and my mother talked about all..
Between "all"..There was the theme He and I..
My mum said about those all things..Apparently my mum didn't know that He loves me really..
She thought my friends are just kidding..
And at the some way I thought it too..
'Cause I have 14years, He 15years..
We are too young for love..For truly lacings..
And...his mum said: "I don't know who at all times is talking about them love, but I know the only one.."
My mum was speechless and she was waiting for the arrear of the sentence..
He's mum continued: "...I know that He loves she really...He fall in love with your daughter!..I folow that when he is talking about she.."
I don't know what my mum said then..
I don't want to know it..
'Cause today my mother said to me:
"I think,my child,you are overmuch together with He..
Be with him a little time smaller than now..Maybe it's better for you, maybe no..I don't know.."
Yes, that said my mum..I don't know now
where I'll go..What to do..I'm confused!!!
She is always joking with me when we
talked about He..
He and I..I and He...
We are not in love-lacing..
I don't know what'll come now..I must be ready for all!
What will I do when he send me a message again?
What will I answer him..Will I answer with smiles
or without smiles? Will I answer him offish?
Will we secret our love..our "lovely friendship"..
I DON'T KNOW...WHY? Again,I don't know..
So..He gave me wings..I lose them!
So..I can't anymore touch the sky..
So..where is my faith?
So..where is my love to He..I think I lost it!
And now I can be only grateful to my fate...
And where are my wings? I don't know..
I was an Angel..maybe I am an Angel..
But an Angel Without Wings..

p.s. "He" je onaj..onaj za kojim moj pogled cesto stane..ne znam zasto,radi cega..ubuduce zvace se "Streber"..



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