Calamities are of two kinds: misfortunes to ourselves, and good fortune to others.
You never know till you try to reach them how accessible men are; but you must approach each man by the right door.
If one morning I walked on top of the water across the Potomac River, the headline that afternoon would read "President Can't Swim".
America believes in education: the average professor earns more money in a year than a professional athlete earns in a whole week.
Newspapermen learn to call a murderer 'an alleged murderer' and the King of England 'the alleged King of England' to avoid libel suits.
To lengthen thy life, lessen thy meals.
As I neared her, I bent to help her up, and was nearly knocked over her.
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