VAITAPU
15.03.2005., utorak
PISMO
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Munich, December 9th, 1942. My own darling! I suffer with you over the beastly unfairness that has been done to you and your companions; but do not let yourself be daunted because they have stolen your leave. Hold your head high despite the bloodhounds' filthy tricks. Before we know it this nightmare will be over and the feathers plucked from the Nazi fowl, which soon all and sundry will be wearing on their chests. I pray to God that He may hold His hand over you and protect you from all the horrors out there at the front. Although you call yourself a pagan and say you do not believe in God, I know that He loves you as well as He does the best of His priests, and when the war is over I shall be able to convince you of that and melt the hard shell of cynicism with which you poor wretches in the fowl-less units have to encompass yourselves. Remember, darling, that sooner or later there must be peace, and then all our lovely dreams will become reality. I have thought that by that time I ought to be able to have a nice practice here in Munich or in Cologne, and my great hope is that you will train as a dentist or something like that. One thing only you must promise me, that you will not stay in the army if there should be an opportunity of making a career there. In six months I shall have completed my special training as a surgeon, and then I shall begin to save for our home. I hope that I shall be able to have it all ready the day you come back. But--no. I hope it won't be as long as that before you come to me forever. I wanted you to come today. Now. Father and Mother have now grown accustomed to the idea of having a son-in-law. At first, of course, they were dumfounded, and you should have seen Father's face when I told him that you had been in prison and a concentration camp and were now in a fowl-less regiment. At first he thought I had gone mad, but when I explained a little more and told him that your "crime" was political, he accepted it without reservation and said that, as long as we loved each other, nothing else mattered. I cannot write about political developments, which I am sure you will know of, for I expect you are pretty well-informed out there. I comfort myself with the thought that, since it is not going to be so long before we two can be together for the rest of our lives, one leave does not mean all that much. Besides, leave now would also be torture, for I would be thinking the whole time that you were having to go back to it all again, and you would be thinking of that too. I am sending you with this a little gold cross. I have worn it round my neck next to my skin ever since I was a little girl, and you are to have it. Wear it, as I have done; it will protect you from all evil out there. Kiss it each evening, as I kiss your ring. Darling, darling Sven, I love you so that it makes my heart ache, and I weep with joy at the thought that we shall soon meet again, and then I shall never let you go. You are mine, only mine, mine alone. I am well aware that now and again you fall a tiny bit in love with a Russian girl, or with one of the German women you meet on troop trains, but I also know that you cannot fall in love with them in the same way as you are with me; and therefore I forgive you in advance if you kiss other women out there and find comfort for a brief while. I am not going to ask that you live like a monk--only you must promise me not to embark upon anything that you cannot tell me about. You have no idea how I cried when that wonderful friend of yours, The Old Un, wrote and told me that you had been killed. It was the loveliest though also the saddest letter I have ever read. But, shock though it was, it was nothing to that I got eleven months later when your letter came telling of how you had been a prisoner. I fainted for the first time in my life; my temperature went up and I had to spend a week in bed. It was quite a collapse. But, heavens, how happy I was! You say that you don't believe in God, but I believe that it was He kept His hand over you, because you are a very proper person, as are your friends. You have your faults and weaknesses, but you are human and purer of heart and more honest in your thoughts than many of those who are never without a rosary in their hands. Do not think that I don't share your loathing of hypocrites and those priests who are mere sanctimonious servants of masters, who do not know, or are recog nized by, the true God and genuine Christianity. But He who preaches mercy cannot help these hypocrites being there, and you must not think that by listening to what He has to say to us all you are making common cause with vicious priests. That is what I so badly want you to understand, and one day you will, I am sure of that. But now I must stop, my dear, beloved husband, and lastly let me beg you to look after yourself out there. I know that it is difficult, but don't let yourself be affected too much by that cynical indifference that is so characteristic of you front-line soldiers. Keep on believing that there is goodness to be found in the world as well. Be careful when you can; that will always help a bit toward my getting you home alive. And now may this New Year be one that brings luck and happiness to us both, and to all others. Your devoted wife, URSULA |
- 17:57 - Ostavi svoj pecat (3) - Otisni - #
Dnevnik.hr |
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Opis bloga
Tekstualni zapisi koji ce opisivati stanja i poglede doticne osobe ili ti autora Autor se ogradzuje od svih mogucih i nemogucih psihickig i fizickig ostacenja koja se mogu javiti na citaocu doticnog bloga . Kaslek: nezgul@hotmail.com
WAITAPU
Cim izades iz magle i opazis Waitapu, ne dozvoli srcu da se odvise nasladuje. Pronadi i zapamti mjesto gdje zavrsava planinski vijenac Wa, a pocinje Tapu. To ces lako otkriti. Planina koja je nekoc bila prelijepa i mila Wa, niza je od sjajne zvijezde Tapu. Tamo gdje se planine spajaju i gdje se planine spajaju i gdje Tapu nadvisuje Wa, tu pocinje tjesnac, pocinje prolaz koji te vodi u raznolike, bogate i beskrajne prostore slobodnih mora. Zuri da najkasnije o zalazu sunca budes na pocetku tjesnaca. Tada se protok vode u prolazu mijenja. Cim izade mjesec, voda ce kao rijeka poteci za tebe u povoljnom smjeru i ti ces jos prije svitanja -- ako jos budes ziv -- stici kamo si toliko zudio, s onu stranu Waitapu! Zakasnis li u tjesnac, ne znam gdje ces i kako docekati zoru! Autor: Joza Horvat |
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