To be honest, I thought it would take me a lot to get there finally, and I've never really believed in myself all the way. All I had was this pinch of faith in God, and that tiny pinch kept growing until it became stronger than any of my negative thoughts and those of others too. I could feel hatred all around me, the only difference this time was that it couldn't reach neither me nor the work which was laid before me. I knew it would never be easy, I knew it back then as I do now. Everything I ever want, I have to create by myself.
So here I am, sitting in this tiny little room trying to make a difference.
In the end you're always left alone, and there is no person who isn't going to betray when it's the least expected.
In the end you're left with yourself, who you are, and what you have made of your life.
Is there any point to be there for others all the way? Of course, but that doesn't mean you can't be there for yourself all the way too, does it?
I guess it all comes to love. Whether you love yourself or not, whether you love your family the way they truely deserve and your life at the point of where you are now.
Really, it's hard to accept difficulty of raw reality, but only when faced with the core of trouble do we have the ability to defeat it and move forward.
I've realised that looking back at the past, grieving and feeling bad about what I did or didn't do won't do much. That's why it's called past, and that's where all the past should be left, in some duck taped box stored in an old basement. Because present is time for making our moves, planning our present actions launches us in desired future.

This time I'm not afraid. This time I won't allow myself to fail. This time it's my turn to step up. The clock is ticking and I'm about to defeat the time master.