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Ljudi koje volim...Linkin Park...obožavam ih Chester-ima prejeben glas, a i na neki je način (bolestan način) kjut ;) Linkin Park..logo Kurt Cobain..legenda I naravno...Nirvana Evanescence...živim za njih -neznam šta bi bez njih! -još slušam:HIM, Metallica, Korn, Nightwish...još puno, puno njih Linkichi na blogove Angelus-metalac...zna on sve ;) Kloshar-dečko je zakon... Maria-zakon, obožavam ju! Black Bitch-my sister...strava blog LeX-frik je sasvim zakon ;) i piše još bolje! Mateja & Mirela-zakon blog...a cure; nemam riječi Barbara-zakon curaaa! One vole skejt-super blogich...a i cure su super ;) Mare (chichka)-zakon, zakon cura...piše...odlično! Marička-cura je zakon...stvarno! Reputable-super cura, a blog mi se ful sviđa! Madness-ime bloga sve govori! Romano-super frik...
Malo o meni...-ime mi je Kristina...volim svoje ime... -rođena sam 25.09.1991. godine...znači imam 14 godina... -volim malo toga...mrzim previše toga... -četo sam deprimirana iliti u depresiji...oni najbliži meni znaju zašto... Volim: sebe (ponekad)...svoje frendice...glazbu...svoju obitelj (rijetko)...crnu boju...svoje starke...Linkin Park... Mrzim: sebe (često)...sebične ljude...snobove...umišljene gadure...život...školu...svoju obitelj (ponekad)...neke ljude... Moš mi se javit na: moj mail A ako oš pričat... kristina_000@msn.com ili ICQ:288-757-799 Immortal Lady I can see you...brojač stavljen: 8.3.2006. This is all I am
All I wanna be...I do...this... Mare (chichka)-Need to...cut I never used drugs but I am addict I tried to hold my life but it just slipped I wanna slice my skin I just feel a need to hurt myself and watch me bleed sweet feeling of cold metal cutting trough my skin searching for savior in my darkest sin if this thoughts don't leave me I will go insane can't let myself fall that deep again that would kill my soul and eat me alive that is why I have to break trough tonight my addiction is becoming opsession I'm hopelessly searching for salvation Something from the inside... Evanescence-Bring me to life how can you see into my eyes like open doors leading you down into my core where i've become so numb without a soul my spirit sleeping somewhere cold until you find it there and lead it back home wake me up inside wake me up inside call my name and save me from the dark bid my blood to run before i come undone save me from the nothing i've become now that i know what i'm without you can't just leave me breathe into me and make me real bring me to life wake me up inside wake me up inside call my name and save me from the dark bid my blood to run before i come undone save me from the nothing i've become bring me to life frozen inside without your touch without your love darling only you are the life among the dead all this time i can't believe i couldn't see kept in the dark but you were there in front of me i've been sleeping a thousand years it seems got to open my eyes to everything without a thought without a voice without a soul don't let me die here there must be something more bring me to life Evanescence-Everybody´s fool perfect by nature icons of self indulgence just what we all need more lies about a world that never was and never will be have you no shame don't you see me you know you've got everybody fooled look here she comes now bow down and stare in wonder oh how we love you no flaws when you're pretending but now i know she never was and never will be you don't know how you've betrayed me and somehow you've got everybody fooled without the mask where will you hide can't find yourself lost in your lie i know the truth now i know who you are and i don't love you anymore it never was and never will be you're not real and you can't save me somehow now you're everybody's fool Evanescence-Going under now i will tell you what i've done for you 50 thousand tears i've cried screaming deceiving and bleeding for you and you still won't hear me don't want your hand this time i'll save myself maybe i'll wake up for once not tormented daily defeated by you just when i thought i'd reached the bottom i'm dying again i'm going under drowning in you i'm falling forever i've got to break through i'm going under blurring and stirring the truth and the lies so i don't know what's real and what's not always confusing the thoughts in my head so i can't trust myself anymore i'm dying again i'm going under drowning in you i'm falling forever i've got to break through so go on and scream scream at me i'm so far away i won't be broken again i've got to breathe i can't keep going under Evanescence-My immortal i'm so tired of being here suppressed by all of my childish fears and if you have to leave i wish that you would just leave because your presence still lingers here and it won't leave me alone these wounds won't seem to heal this pain is just too real there's just too much that time cannot erase when you cried i'd wipe away all of your tears when you'd scream i'd fight away all of your fears and i've held your hand through all of these years but you still have all of me you used to captivate me by your resonating light but now i'm bound by the life you left behind your face it haunts my once pleasant dreams your voice it chased away all the sanity in me these wounds won't seem to heal this pain is just too real there's just too much that time cannot erase when you cried i'd wipe away all of your tears when you'd scream i'd fight away all of your fears and i've held your hand through all of these years but you still have all of me i've tried so hard to tell myself that you're gone and though you're still with me i've been alone all along Evanescence-Tourniquet i tried to kill the pain but only brought more i lay dying and i'm pouring crimson regret and betrayal i'm dying praying bleeding and screaming am i too lost to be saved am i too lost? my God my tourniquet return to me salvation my God my tourniquet return to me salvation do you remember me lost for so long will you be on the other side or will you forget me i'm dying praying bleeding and screaming am i too lost to be saved am i too lost? my God my tourniquet return to me salvation my God my tourniquet return to me salvation my wounds cry for the grave my soul cries for deliverance will i be denied Christ tourniquet my suicide Nirvana-Come as you are Come, as you are. As you were. As I want you to be. As a friend. As a friend. As an old enemy. Take your time. Hurry up. The choice is yours. Don't be late. Take a rest. As a friend. As a old memory, memory, memory, memory. Come. Dowsed in mud. Soaked in bleach. As I want you to be. As a trend. As a friend. As an old memory, memory, memory, memory. And I swear that I don't have a gun. No I don't have a gun. No I don't have a gun. Memory, memory, memory, memory (don't have a gun). And I swear that I don't have a gun. No I don't have a gun. No I don't have a gun. No I don't have a gun. No I don't have a gun. Memory, memory... Nirvana-Darin you One bady to another says. I'm lucky to have met you. I don't care what you think unless. It is about me. It is now my duty to completely drain you. A travel through a tube and end up in your infection. Chew your meat for you. Pass it back and forth. In a passionate kiss. From my mouth to yours. 'cause I like you. With eyes so dilated. I've became your pupil. You've taught me everything. Without a poison apple. The water is so yellow. I'm a healthy student. Indebted and so grateful. Vacuum out the fluids. Chew your meat for you. Pass it back and forth. In a passionate kiss. From my mouth to yours. 'cause I like you. You! You! You! You! You! One bady to another says. I'm lucky to have met you. I don't care what you think unless. It is about me. It is now my duty to completely drain you. A travel through a tube and end up in your infection. Chew your meat for you. Pass it back and forth. In a passionate kiss. From my mouth to yours. 'cause I like you. Nirvana-I hate myself and want to die Runny nose and runny yolk Even if you have a cold still You can cough on me again I still havent had my fulfill In the someday what's that sound? Broken heart and broken bones Think of how a castrated horse feels One more quirky cliche'd phrase You're the one I wanna refill In the someday what's that sound? [Spoken interlude in middle] Most people don't realize That two large pieces of coral, Painted brown, and attached to his skull With common wood screws can make a child look like a deer Nirvana-Rape me Rape me, my friend Rape me again I'm not the only one Do it and do it Again Waste me Taste me, my friend My favorite inside source I'll kiss your open sores Appreciate your concern You'll always stink and burn Nirvana-Smeels like teen spirit Load up on guns and Bring your friends It's fun to lose And to pretend She's over bored And self assured Oh no, I know A dirty word hello, how low? [x bunch of times] With the lights out it's less dangerous Here we are now Entertain us I feel stupid and contagious Here we are now Entertain us A mulatto An albino A mosquito My Libido Yeah I'm worse at what I do best And for this gift I feel blessed Our little group has always been And always will until the end hello, how low? [x bunch of times] With the lights out it's less dangerous Here we are now Entertain us I feel stupid and contagious Here we are now Entertain us A mulatto An albino A mosquito My Libido Yeah And I forget Just why I taste Oh yeah, I guess it makes me smile I found it hard It was hard to find Oh well, whatever, nevermind hello, how low? [x bunch of times] With the lights out it's less dangerous Here we are now Entertain us I feel stupid and contagious Here we are now Entertain us A mulatto An albino A mosquito My Libido Yeah, a denial A denial A denial... Nirvana-You know you´re right I will never bother you I will never promise to I will never follow you I will never bother you Never speak a word again I will crawl away for good I will move away from here You wont be afraid of fear No thought was put in to this I always knew it would come to this Things have never been so swell I have never failed to feel Pain [3x] You Know your Right [3x] I'm so warm and calm inside I no longer have to hide Let’s talk about someone else Steaming soup against her mouth Nothing really bothers her She just wants to love herself I will move away from here You wont be afraid of fear No thought was put into this I always knew to come like this Things have never been so swell I have never failed to feel Pain [5x] You know Your Right [17x] Pain [1x]
Something from the inside...Linkin Park-In the end(It starts with) One thing / I don’t know why It doesn’t even matter how hard you try Keep that in mind / I designed this rhyme To explain in due time All I know time is a valuable thing Watch it fly by as the pendulum swings Watch it count down to the end of the day The clock ticks life away It’s so unreal Didn’t look out below Watch the time go right out the window Trying to hold on / but didn’t even know Wasted it all just to Watch you go I kept everything inside and even though I tried / it all fell apart What it meant to me / will eventually / be a memory / of a time when I tried so hard And got so far But in the end It doesn't even matter I had to fall To lose it all But in the end It doesn't even matter One thing / I don’t know why It doesn’t even matter how hard you try Keep that in mind / I designed this rhyme To remind myself how I tried so hard In spite of the way you were mocking me Acting like I was part of your property Remembering all the times you fought with me I’m surprised it got so (far) Things aren’t the way they were before You wouldn’t even recognize me anymore Not that you knew me back then But it all comes back to me In the end You kept everything inside and even though I tried / it all fell apart What it meant to me / will eventually / be a memory / of a time when I I tried so hard And got so far But in the end It doesn’t even matter I had to fall To lose it all But in the end It doesn’t even matter I've put my trust in you Pushed as far as I can go And for all this There’s only one thing you should know I've put my trust in you Pushed as far as I can go And for all this There’s only one thing you should know I tried so hard And got so far But in the end It doesn’t even matter I had to fall To lose it all But in the end It doesn’t even matter Linkin Park-By myself Myself Myself What do I do to ignore them behind me Do I follow my instincts blindly Do I hide my pride from these bad dreams And give in to sad thoughts that are maddening Do I sit here and try to stand it Or do I try to catch them red-handed Do I trust some and get fooled by phoniness Or do I trust nobody and live in loneliness Because I can't hold on when I'm stretched so thin I make the right moves but I'm lost within I put on my daily facade but then I just end up getting hurt again By myself (myself) I ask why But in my mind I find I can't rely on myself (myself) I ask why But in my mind I find I cant rely on myself I cant look around (Its too much to take in) I cant hold on (When im stretched so thin) I cant slow down (Watching everything spin) I cant look past (Its starting over again) If I turn my back I'm defenseless And to go blindly seems senseless If I hide my pride and let it all go on Then they'll take from me'till everything is gone If I let them go I'll be outdone But if I try to catch them I'll be outrun If I'm killed by the questions like a cancer Then I'll be buried in the silence of the answer By myself (myself) I ask why But in my mind I find I can't rely on myself (myself) I ask why But in my mind I find I cant rely on myself I cant look around (Its too much to take in) I cant hold on (When im stretched so thin) I cant slow down (Watching everything spin) I cant look past (Its starting over again) Dont you(being said repeaditly in the backround) Dont you (know) I cant tell you how to make it (go) No mater what I do, how hard I (try) I cant seem to convince myself (why) Im stuck on the outside Dont you (know) I cant tell you how to make it (go) No matter what I do, how hard I (try) I cant seem to convince myself (why) Im stuck on the outside Dont you (know) I cant tell you how to make it (go) No matter what I do, how hard I (try) I cant seem to convince myself (why) Im stuck on the outside Dont you (know) I cant tell you how to make it (go) No matter what I do, how hard I (try) I cant seem to convince myself (why) Im stuck on the outside Dont you (know) I cant tell you how to make it (go) No matter what I do, how hard I (try) I cant seem to convince myself (why) Im stuck on the outside Dont you (know) I cant tell you how to make it (go) No matter what I do, how hard I (try) I cant seem to convince myself (why) Im stuck on the outside Linkin Park-Faint I am a little bit of loneliness a little bit of disregard Handful of complaints but I can’t help the fact that everybody can see these scars I am what I want you to want what I want you to feel But it's like no matter what I do, I can't convince you, to just believe this is real So I let go, watching you, turn your back like you always do Face away and pretend that I'm not But I'll be here cause you want what I've got [Chorus] (I can't feel the way I did before) (Don't turn your back on me) (I won't be ignored) (Time won't heal this damage anymore) (Don't turn your back on me) (I won't be ignored) I am a little bit insecure a little unconfident Cause you don't understand I do what I can but sometimes I don't make sense I say what you never wanna say but I've never had a doubt It's like no matter what I do I can't convince you for once just to hear me out So I let go watching you turn your back like you always do Face away and pretend that I'm not But I'll be here 'cause you’re all that I've got [Chorus] (I can't feel the way I did before) (Don't turn your back on me) (I won't be ignored) (Time won't heal this damage anymore) (Don't turn your back on me) (I won't be ignored) (Now) (Hear me out now) (You're gonna listen to me, like it or not) (Right now) (Hear me out now) (You're gonna listen to me, like it or not) (Right now) (I can't feel the way I did before) (Don't turn your back on me) (I won't be ignored) [Chorus] (I can't feel the way I did before) (Don't turn your back on me) (I won't be ignored) (Time won't heal this damage anymore) (Don't turn your back on me) (I won't be ignored) [Chorus] (I can't feel the way I did before) (Don't turn your back on me) (I won't be ignored) (Time won't heal this damage anymore) (Don't turn your back on me) (I won't be ignored) I can't feel I won't be ignored Time won't heal Don't turn your back on me I won't be ignored Linkin Park-Numb I'm tired of being what you want me to be Feeling so faithless lost under the surface Don't know what you're expecting of me Put under the pressure of walking in your shoes (Caught in the undertow just caught in the undertow) Every step I take is another mistake to you (Caught in the undertow just caught in the undertow) [Chorus] I've become so numb I can't feel you there I've become so tired so much more aware I've becoming this all I want to do Is be more like me and be less like you Can't you see that you're smothering me Holding too tightly afraid to lose control Cause everything that you thought I would be Has fallen apart right in front of you (Caught in the undertow just caught in the undertow) Every step that I take is another mistake to you (Caught in the undertow just caught in the undertow) And every second I waste is more than I can take [Chorus] I've become so numb I can't feel you there I've become so tired so much more aware I've becoming this all I want to do Is be more like me and be less like you And I know I may end up failing too But I know You were just like me with someone disappointed in you [Chorus] I've become so numb I can't feel you there I've become so tired so much more aware I've becoming this all I want to do Is be more like me and be less like you [Chorus] I've become so numb I can't feel you there Is everything what you want me to be I've become so numb I can't feel you there Is everything what you want me to be Linkin Park-One step closer I cannot take this anymore I'm saying everything I've said before All these words they make no sense I find bliss in ignorance Less I hear the less you'll say But you'll find that out anyway Just like before... Everything you say to me Takes me one step closer to the edge And I'm about to break I need a little room to breathe Cause I'm one step closer to the edge And I'm about to break I find the answers aren't so clear Wish I could find a way to disappear All these thoughts they make no sense I find bliss in ignorance Nothing seems to go away Over and over again shut up when I'm talking to you |
The naslov...:p
Jooj, ljudi moji...kak ste vi meni? Ja sam sasvim oke...i sasvim solidno ;)...haha...neznam ni sama o čem da pišem...danas smo imali 4 sata...nulti hrvatski, onda šupljak, onda tzk, onda kemiju, onda hrvatski, onda šupljak, pa nas je žena iz matiše pustila doma ;). I sretna sam ful, jer će mi Marija spržit 3 CD-a od Korna...a Galička će mi spržit Evanescence (jer nemam njihov CD, imala sam na kompu...al sam imala viruse, pa mi se sve pobrisalo :(() Još samo da mi Bradač oće dat CD od S.O.A.D.-a il od Slipknota, makar nisam sigurna da on njih sluša :)...uglavnom, happy sam zbog toga...i stvarno radim na svom imiđu...da budem što mračnija...evo, kupila sam si i svoj prvi killer (slike pogledajte dolje), a Maja mi je neke lance posudila, makar ću si ja kupit nove-svoje :)...isto slike možete pogledat dolje...pa ono, pošto smo imali 4 sata odzujala sam do grada s curama si kupit prazne CD-e i ono...otišle smo na kavu...makar smo bile kratko...al je bilo slatko :)...a jesam glupa, o čem ja pišem..maaajko Isusova :p...haha...i tak vam je to...bilo mi je ful zabavno danas...i sretna sam kaj imam taj killer...ono, ful mi se sviđa...i vidla sam još dva zakon killera i kupit ću si ih, mislim koštaju 35kn, a to nije baš skupo...zakon su mi...pokupila sam novi nick u školi; exorcizam :) lol, sviđa mi se :). Haha...i da, mjenjam nick u Immortal Lady možda promjenim i link bloga, makar neznam...sve ću vam ja javit, ne brinite vi za to ;)...samo mi ostanite lijepi i...debeli :p haha...efo vam sad slike...pa uživajte...kiss! |
Krizma...
Ahh...šta da vam kažem ljudi moji...sve skupa; bilo mi je odlično! Neznam ni od kud da počnem...jednostavno; od početka, ne? ;)...ja sam vam fucked up i jako komplikejted cura, ma možda i previshe ;)...uglavnom...u petak navečer nisam išla van, jer me stara nije pustila...zašto? Zato jer sam bila na ispovjedi od 4 do 7 :), ne...ne, zbog tog kaj sam imala tolko grjeha, nego smo imali i tu probu i to sve :)...uglavnom, navečer sam došla doma i pukla sam totalno...ono, plakala sam ko kišna godina...grozno...to ste trebali vidjet...a fakat mi me bilo žao ;)...a plakala sam iz glupog razloga; jer me stara OPET iživcirala...aaa! Grozno sam se osječala...ko neko smeće...i onda sam još samo morala pomislit na krizmu sutra...htjela sam umrjet, e! Strashno nešto :p Al ono, samo sam htjela zaspat i nisam htjela ić na krizmu...al morala sam :(...nda...probudila sam se ujutro u 7h...sama...viš kak me škola sjebala :p...otišla na WC i vratila se u krpe...onda mi je sat u 8h zvonio...ja sam ležala 5min u krevetu...i išla se spremat...spremala sam se faking sat i pol...strašno! Onda smo u pol 10 krenuli u crkvu...došli smo tam, ja sam samo s Ivanom uletila u crkvu, pozdravila se sa svima i toe bilo to...krenula je ceremonija primanja Duha Svetog (čitaj; mučenja)...ja sam ipak cijelo vrijeme pričala s curama...polu glasno...nije mi se dalo slušat tog popa il kaj već je...bilo mi je oke u crkvi i sve je to relativno brzo prošlo ;)...onda sam išla s tetom u King Cross...majko mila..kako ja volim hodat u visokim petama..makar su moje "štikle" bile relativno normalne visine...bilo mi je zabavno hodat u njima po King Crossu i još sam bila onak sređena...ma super sam si izgledala :)...haha...super mi je bilo tak hodat..mislim, tak obučena...stvarno doživljaj :)))...uglavnom...ručak je trebo bit u 2h...svi su došli u pol 3-3 (normala) i tak...ja sam bila pristojna prema svima, stalno se smješkala i tak...ručala sam..malo išla sim-tam...ma bilo mi je zakon...sa svima sam pričala...zadovoljna sam svojim "nastupom", jer sam ostavila dosta dobar dojam na ljude :)) aah...ja sam vam rođena glumica...:)...i tak...najbolje mi je bilo kad sam pomagala Rudiju u kafiću...ma ja volim konobarit tj. obožavam...stvarno...neznam zaš...al to mi ide i stvarno mi je zakon to radit...najbolji dio mi je to bio...i dobila sam tringlta (znate kaj to znači?) 13 kn :))...stvarno super...to neki ne dobiju u tjedan dana...ja sam to dobila samo kaj sam odnjela 3 pive, 2 gemišta i pelinkovac :)) haha...super mi je bilo stvarno...i totalno sam zadovoljna sa svime...ugl. neda mi se sad u detalje, al ono...bili smo tam do 10.30h...mislim, pol ih je otišlo, samo su neki ostali...al je bilo zabavno ;)...hehe...i da, moram se pohvalit; bogatija sam za: 3 920 kn ;)...dobila sam digitalac, iPod, lančić i sat...al su mi novci najbitniji, ofkorz ;)...laku noch svima i čitam ose...kiss! |
New post...new me...
A šta da vam kažem? Danas definitivno neće biti izljeva emocija ko i inače...ne brinite ljudi! Jučer, jučer, jučer...mi je bio ODLIČAN dan...makar sam ja bila u kurcu, totalnom...pa nisam to ni doživljavala kao nešto dobro...naime (koja riječ :)), dobila sam 5 iz hrvatskog i 5 iz zemljopisa...onda, prek jučer sam dobila 3 iz ispravka iz kemije...a zbog kemije sam najsretnija, jer sam fakat misla da neću ispravit onu kulju! Al eto :) ispravila sam...i onda samo još pisali test iz hrvatskog..računam il trojku il četvorku, neznam. Uglavnom...fakat se moram trudit oko te faking škole...meni treba 47 bodova za ekonomsku, a ja imam faking 45...:(((...želim plakat, bokte! Al ako ću imat 5 iz zem-a, onda ću imat 46 bodova i samo mi jedan faking bod fali...a stara je rekla da ak treba, da će ona ić žicat to za mene :)). Al šta ja znam...za to se treba trudit, a meni se fakat, al fakat neda :(...ma, ajde, dat ću sve od sebe, al se neću forsat...i onda sam još saznala da mi i Maja ide u ekonomsku...weee :)...i sretna sam zbog tog, jako, jako...jer mi je ona super, ma sve naj! Haha..super mi je jer isto oblači crno :))...al je i oke osoba ;)...uglavnom...jučer sam bila u gradu s Ivanom i njom...i zujale smo uglavnom...imala sam svoje (jedine :(() crne hlače i jela sam sladoled i onda mi je sladoled pao na hlače, pa sam ga na kraju zakucala u neki zid i išla čistit hlače :p zajebi sladoled, glavno da se hlače spase...također sam umirala od smijeha...onda smo bile sat i pol na kavi i...tračale, uglavnom :)...kasnije je Ivana morala doma, a ja i Maja smo se išle prošetat...našla sam super dučan s crnim hlačama...onda smo otišle u još jedan dučan...tam sam vidla SAVRŠEN killer...mm...odličan je...:)...I will buy it today...:)...i onda sam vidla još jedan :), al taj jedan drugom prilikom (stavit ću sliku na blog)..onda sam vidla zakon, zakon majcu s Nirvanom, još jednu super s Linkin Parkom...i samo ću reć; te su majce MOJE :)...i vidla sam odličnu majcu s Fuck you...uglavnom srednji je prst prek cijele majce, odlična je...također je moja ;)...samo je jedini problem kaj je to XXL veličina, a to...je malkice preveliko za mene :)...haha...ma koga jebe...meni su majce zakon! ;)...i Maja će si kupit onaj kiler...onda čemo si ić kupit u jedan dučan lance...al lijepe lančiče ;)...al ja ću si to na ruku stavit...haha...ful, ful mi je drago da će i Maja to počet furat...i dogovorile smo se da sad samo, ali samo crno furamo...ni jedan odjevni predmet nesmije biti u boji, sad je samo crno ;)...i drago mi je da to s nekim počinjem...mislim, lakše mi je ak to s nekim počnem nosit, nego sama...ne? Moralno mi je lakše...imam podršku...bar od nekog...al kad mi Lorena počne srat o tom kak se oblačim, kak to izgledam...Lorena je inače moja frendica :)...ma, marš! Ak ti se ne sviđa, makni se od mene...meni je to zakon i ja ću to što mi je zakon nosit, ne? Uglavnom, među sedmašima ima puno takvih frikova i frikica...koji se tak oblače, nitko nije "normalan", ako me kužite? Ono, ful super...samo što...svi su gadni ko niš...al stvarno svi...posebno dečki...i cure :)...ma, kome ja meljem...eeee...da...jučer sam saznala šta je Ivona rekla o meni (Ivona je moja ex frendica) i danas ću joj pičku razbit...riječima, ofkorz ;)...ajde, ljudi...idem i ja...pobacat vam komentare...kiss svima! |
Hvala...
Hvala svima, ali svima na tim komentarima...makar, i sami znate da se ništa neće promjeniti! Ali danas...danas nemam nekakve inspiracije za prepričavanje mojih misli, osječaja...radije bih prešla na "normalne stvari"...naime, jucher sam gledala "Sanju" (onaj talk show na RTL-u) i uglavnom govorili su o "metalcima"...bilo je totalno jadno i ponižavajuče...no, bila je jedna cura...duga smeđa kosa, do šupka...kožne hlače, crna majca...jedino kaj mi se na njoj svidjelo su bile marte...sve ostalo je bilo za bacit...ona je kao neka metalka...misklim, je...vidi se po njenom načinu odjevanja...al vidi se da je cura sretna...i Sanja je u jednom trenutku pitala "Šta mislite...pošto slušate heavy metal...jel ste zbog tog stalno u depresiji?" Naravno...svi su odgovorili sa "ne!" mislim...koji kreten ide to pitat? Vrsta glazbe koju netko sluša nema nikakve veze dali je on sretan ili nesretan...samo...neki bolje pokazuju dali su sretni ili nisu...ja sam tek počela...mislim, pokazivati koliko sam nesretna...ali nemojte mislit da sam ovakva i u školi...ne u školi, vani...ma samo da nisam doma...ja sam vam sretna...nasmijana...pričam...i uglavnom...lijepo mi je...jer, nevolim biti doma...onda samo crno razmišljam, pa vi dobijete dojam da sam ja sva crna...trudim se, hehe ;)...uglavnom...ja vam živim za subotu, jer u tih nekoliko sati...ja se malo napijem, zaboravim na sve probleme, zajebavam se...ne mislim o ničem drugom nego o tom dal me onaj lik gleda...;)...mislim da o ničem drugom ni netrebam mislit, ne? Ali opet..kad dođe nedjelja, od same pomisli na ponedjeljak mi se bljuje...ona prođe taj ponedjeljak, pa utorak...pa tako stalno u krug, sve monotono...ni sama neznam koliko sam puta prešla ovu moju školu...znam svaki njen kutak...pa ipak, tamo idem punih 8 godina...ali za čudo, ta škola mi nije dosadila...jer ipak, to je moj drugi dom...više zatvor...al neka :)...ja volim školu, ali nastavu i profesore...prezirem. Zašto? Jer je potrebno objašnjavat...bilo mi je najjače kad mi je profa iz hrv-a rekla da imam smisla za pisanje...al sam ipak dobila 3 iz tog sastavka :(, mislim HALO! Ako imam smisla za pisanje, kak mogu 3 dobit?! Di je tu faking logika? Al nema veze, pomirila sam se s tim da je život kuja...pa ću onda i ja bit...ne, ne prema svima...samo prema životu! Ja se trudim bit pristojna, uvijek pozdravim...popričam...ma sve šta treba...samo da ljudi ne dobiju neku krivu sliku o meni...jer ja stvarno jesam takva...pristojna. Ne, ne u smislu da ne psujem :p haha, ja psujem ko kočijaš...nego, ono...u smislu da sam pristojna kad pričam s nekim, kad treba nekog poznatog pozdravit i tako...neugodno bi mi bilo da to ne napravim...nda...šta sam još htjela reć? Eeee da...hvala vam još jednom na komentarima ;)...nadam se da vam nisam dosadna s tom deprom, al jebiga...ne, neću se ubit, nisam sposobna za to ;)...ajde, idem..idem...pišemo danas zemljopis i hrvatski...držite mi fige! Kiss |
Život ide dalje...
Nažalost...ah! Jučer nisam pisala post...neznam, nije mi se dalo...2 puta sam počela, al onda sam pobrisala sve i od svega odustala...polako odustajem od sebe, od života...jučer...bila sam sama u sobi...ko i inače...i počela razmišljati "Čemu sve ovo? Zašto se toliko mučim? Zašto plačem toliko? Zar nebi bilo jednostavnije da me...nema?" ne, nisam plakala...nisam imala više suza...dosadilo mi je plakanje...možete si samo zamislit šta sam si onda radila..neke osobe znaju, a neke su pre glupe da skuže...volim gledat ljude...volim sjditi na klupici i promatrati ljude...njihove izraze lica...način na koji pričaju...ljudi su zabavna stvorenja...neki više, neki manje...haha...volim gledat ljude...stare, mlade...srednje :)...a najviše volim gledat suprotan spol...hehe...oni su mi najzanimljiviji :)...neznam, stvarno...jučer sma prvi put stvarno, al stvarno stvarno pomislila na samoubojstvo...neznam dal sam sposobna to napravit...al...pomislila sam kako bi bilo da me nema...kako bi bilo da sve moje muke nestanu...samo se treba...ubit! Meni bi definitivno bilo lakše...a neznam, možda bi i drugima...kao što rekoh; ako se nekom ne sviđam ja, moje razmišljanje...neka lagano odjebe od mene...jer ja se ne namjeravam mjenjat zbog jednog pojedinca...ako ću se ikad mjenjat, mjenjat ću se samo i isključivo zbog sebe...samo sam ja toga vrijedna...jooj! I sama sebe živciram s ovim "filozofskim" textovima...al jebiga...sad sam u toj fazi...kad mi je jedino pisanje ostalo i..još nešto..neću reći šta..neki od vas i znaju..neki ne...jučer...jučer sam išla u školu :)...obukla sam crne hlače, crnu majcu, crnu vestu, moje starkice, imala sam crni lak, dosta crne olovke...sama sam se sebi sviđala...ljudi su me drugačije gledali...moja je frendica skoro šiznula kad me vidla tako obučenu...haha..ona ne voli ni kad se ja, ni Maja oblačimo u crno...makar, kod Maje je to normala...ja sam tek počela...i ne namjeravam prestat...više neznam obuč nešto drugo...osim crnog...sve ostalo izgleda grozno na meni...samo je crno lijepo...crno...volim crnu boju :)...sad si još moram kupit neki mali cjatki kiler..makar, kileri nisu cjatki :p...al samo jedan..moram imat...i moram si kupit neki remen...i onda ću bit u potpunosti happy...jer znam i sama koliko sam čekala te crne faking hlače...sad neću kupovat ništa što nije crno! I am happy...ali samo što se nekih stvari tiče....uvijek će bit nekih stvari koje me razočaraju, povrjede...al uvijek ću imat to moje...crnilo...moju sobu...gdje mogu radit šta želim...nda...uglavnom...uživajte ljudi, samo...nemojte uživat u životu ;)..uživajte u važnijim stvarima...kiss! |
Potaknuta razgovorom...
Zašto su ljudi nesretni? Zašto ima samoubojstava? Zašto ima kriminala?...nemožemo nikog krivit nego same sebe...mi smo krivi za sve...ljudi...najgora stvorenja na svijetu...misle samo na sebe...kako će što više para zaradit...sve se svelo na novac...na komercijalu...na vanjskost....na izgled...nitko si više nemože naći posao...zato ima toliko ubojstava...ljudima TREBA novac...o pljačakama da i ne pričam...a samoubojstava ima previše...ljudi si oduzimaju život zbog te droge...novca...makar, nekad novac i nije glavni motiv...ljudi se ubijaju zbog raznih stvari...npr. škole...pre teško je...ta škola je toliki stres...naravno da ti dođe da se ubiješ...pogotovo teenageri...nemožemo podnjet više to...stvarno neznam osobu koja voli školu i uživa u njoj...toga nema...nadalje...ljudi se ubijaju najviše zbog novca (to smo zaključili)...novac je postao legalna droga...bez njega nemožemo...nemožemo ni bez zraka...ali ako nemaš novaca...nemaš ničega...ja mislim da se novcem može SVE kupiti...makar, ja neželim biti prljavo bogata...jer mrzim te ljude...jer se preseravaju previše...ljudi su nezahvalni...bezobrazni...plitki...odvratni! Čast izuzecima, naravno...jednostavno...neki od nas su pre slabi da bi nastavili živjeti u takvom svijetu i ja ih u potpunosti razumijem...makar, ja neželim otići...želim gledati te jadnike...koji žude za lovom...želim im se smijati...jadni su ti ljudi...koji misle samo na sebe i na svoje interese...ja sam previše puta bila povrjeđena...samo sam se jednoj osobi u potpunosti otvorila...i neznam šta bi bez te osobe...svi ostali...nisu vrijedni niti mene, a kamoli mojeg povjrenja...prije sam previše davala...sad više neću...dosta mi je toga...dosta mi je da me ljudi gaze i iskorištavaju...ako želiš moje povjerenje...potrudit češ se...inače, za mene češ ostat nitko i ništa...samo još jedna mutna slika u mojoj glavi...nitko bitan...ne, nisam umišljena...samo stojim iza svojih riječi...imam svoje JA...makar, samopouzdanje mi je na nuli...što se izgleda tiče, ofkorz....ali što se mojeg mišljenja tiće...mojih stavova...ne bojim ih se reći na glas...volim gledat reakcije ljudi...volim promatrat ljude...tako su..izgubljeni...no, i ja sam...naravno...kao i svaki čovjek na ovom svijetu...tražimo svoju sreću...uzalud...tražimo sebe...radimo sve da bi se drugima svidjeli...zašto? Zašto sam se ja uopće rodila...da me drugi vrjeđaju? I da se stara dere na mene svaki put kad ne pospremim sobu? Jesam ju ja tražila da me rodi...nisam! E, pa...neka sad snosi jebene posljedice...ja se više neću mjenjat...ni zbog nje...a kamoli zbog nekog drugog...ne isplati se...volite me zbog onog što jesam..inače, odjebite! Inače, ovo vam je još jedan izljev faking emocija ;)...ali zato i blog služi, ne? ajde, idem ja polako...pusa svima! |