en directe - radio flaixbac.
07/26/2010
~ Jesi li ikad bio zaljubljen? Uzasno je, zar ne? Postanes tako ranjiv. Otvori ti srce, sto znaci da netko moze uci unutar njega i cijelog te zbuniti. Toliko vremena potrosis podizuci sve te zidove, kako te nista ne bi moglo povrijediti, i onda jedna glupa osoba, nimalo razlicita od ostalih glupih osoba useta u tvoj glupi zivot.
I onda, jednog dana napravi nesto tako glupo, poljubi te ili ti se nasmije i tada tvoj vlastiti zivot nije vise tvoj. Ljubav zarobljava ljude, udje ti pod kozu. Na kraju te ostavi samog, placuci u mraku. Boli. Ne samo u masti. Ne samo unutar granica vlastita uma. To je prava udje-u-tebe-i-unisti-te-cijelog bol. Mrzim ljubav.
~ I miss you when something really good happens, because you’re the one I want to share it with. I miss you when something is troubling me, because you’re the one who understands me so well. I miss you when I laugh and cry, because I know that you’re the one that makes my laughter grow, and my tears disappear. I miss you all the time, but I miss you the most when I lay awake at night, and think of all the winderful times that we spent with each other for those were the best and most memorable times of my life.
~ She believes in me. And I’m a dreamer so it’s good to have somebody like that in my life. If she goes away, I don’t know what I’m going to do. I mean, she’s my greatest friend, you know? Actually, she’s more than that – she’s my everything.
07/31/2010
~For all this time I’ve been loving you
Don’t even know your name
For just one night
We could be the same
No matter what they say
You know, I want to learn languages. From Hungarian to Arabic, everything goes. I’ll probably enroll to arabic course this year, when the school starts. I mean, I really love languages. Not more than programming. I think they’re on the same level, if you can say so. I’d like to be a programmer, to program for a living, and to speak different languages for fun. Wouldn’t that be cool?
But, there’s English. I adore English. But, as we will see from my exam results, I’m not that good at it. I mean, I am good at it. But obviously not that good to, for example, go out studying in Oxford. My CAE level is not A, unfortunately. But, okay then. It’s kinda my fault, you know. I didn’t prepare myself enough out of the class, at home. I won’t mention school because we didn’t do anything there concerning English. My class teacher was an English teacher, so we mostly didn’t have English classes, but... you know, free time to study other subjects and stuff. (*)
Wouldn’t it be nice... no, wait, not nice. It’s a really vague word. /*see, I learned AND used a new word: vague!*/ You say something, and yet you didn’t say anything. I realized that people, at most times, speak vaguely. Talking, saying sentences with no particular meaning. I do that, too, don’t think I don’t. We all do it. Some more, some less.
Anyway, how did I get to this topic? Vague speaking. Sounds fun. I wanted to say, actually, that... hm. I think I wanted to start enlisting all the languages I want to know. I already know English and Croatian. I’d say that I forgot German, which is not very far from the truth. I study Hungarian and Spanish at home. My wishes for next /*or should I say this*/ year are Catalan and Arabic. Look, six languages already. French is also on my wishlist, but a bit lower than these languages, since the French write one thing, and pronounce the other. Thanks, but no thanks... for now.
You know, I bought myself a really cute little Picasso notebook, and still, I’m writing here. A habit left from New York. God, how I want to get back there! It was really awesome! /*The British, one of my favourite nations would probably say awe-inspiring. I like that word too, but, listen, awesome sounds so much better.*/ That notebook is to replace my old one, The Black Book. Now that sounds awesome. The Black Book. It’s not even a book, but let’s ignore that fact.
08/04/2010
I like writing in English.
Nowadays, lots of memories are passing through my head. From Barcelona to New York. I miss everything. Why is a week too short for my class? Why are two weeks too short for New York? Damn. In Barcelona it was beautiful. I miss... well... you know. The One I Shouldn’t Miss. With all capital letters, yeah. Not that one who came to the bus station with his GIRL, oh, no. /*In some ideal situation that, of course, happened only in my head, he would have come there for me, not because his girlfriend came for her sister. Oh, definitely not because of her.*/ Anyway, where was I? Ah, That Man. Let’s call him TM, short for That Man. Okay, I know he’s too old for me. I also know that he’s... well, if I write it here, everyone will know who he is, so I won’t. I know and that’s only thing that matters.
I don’t miss him that much, though.
I recall things that he had said, or done, at that time. It looked sweet... to me. To my mind, to be more precise. And my mind can take everything said/done in its own way. „Oh, he has done that because of me! Look, he wants to please me!” and stuff. Actually, TM was sweet, when you put it that way. He, kinda, cared for me. Except when he wanted to pay me a sangría. Man, that was... no one has ever paid me a drink! Or at least half of that drink. Damn, boy! In those moments /*when I recall it*/ I really miss him. And the game he played with me and Pero. /*okay, now everyone who was close to us when we played it knows who he is. Actually, I think people would know even before, if they read what I wrote up there.*/ And the Word he said. Oh God. Him. Saying that Word. For God’s sake! I mean, there’s nothing bad in it. It’s more strange than bad, you know, Him saying that Word. God!
One love, one love!
Enrique Iglesias
Girl, please excuse me if I’m coming to you strong
Let me hear you go:
Baby, I like it!
Yep, I did like it. And The New York Guy, with whom I wanted to try whatever I wanted to try, damn... total beginner mistake. French Kissing in the USA, yeah, right. Damn you, boy! I think I like you. Still. Yes. No. Maybe? Damn!
Fornication Under the Consent of the King.
You know what? I won’t try to find a boyfriend this year. I guess. I almost put here „I promise”. I don’t promise, although I’d like to, but I’ll do my best.
(*) cae passed. grade B. <3
as for all this written above, a big part written in new york is missing, and i won't put it here. first entry is copied from one girl's profile, quotations are great. other two parts are written at the seaside. and, if i were you, i wouldn't take some parts for serious. :) it is really crap.
Post je objavljen 22.08.2010. u 20:29 sati.