'To bump into her... somewhere... whenever. To fall in love... fool her into falling in love with me... have a good time... good meaning continuing bliss of having everything so intensly that wanting anything else would be just a waste of time... get married... have kids... make decent people of them... have troubled times and have them remembered as times when we really were together... lay on the death bed saying to your kids that you're so fucked with that morphine drip that you feel like diving, having sex and getting a massage at the same time... have a friend of yours, a doctor, to end it all... you know, to have you discharged with your honour intact... something like that. I would like my life to be something like that.' – I thought as I bumped into her.
'You stupid fuck! Go back to the Zoo or find yourself a nice tree if you don't get it yet that other people walk around too... and they do manage not being at the same place and at the same time with someone else...' – she said, looking really angry
'I really am sorry... they changed my medications so I'm getting used to them... in a day or two I'll be able to remember events like this one...' – I responded with a smile.
She looked at me, smiled back and kicked me in the balls. I've never been kicked in the balls by someone who really ment to kick me in the balls. The pain was immediate and strong and getting stronger at horribly progresive pace. I found my self with my face on the pavement not believeing that all this was real. The policeman appeared in my sight, holding the girl under her arm... tightly... and asked if she was the one who hit me since he couldn't tell becouse the bus blocked his view for a momment.
'I don't know... what is going on... fuck!' – I answered honestly being temporarily mentaly disabled to deal with anything else but growing pain nesting among my guts like an iron snake.
'He is my brother... he is changing his meds... they said he might have seizuress but I didn't expect it to be so... oh, my God... what shall I do... can you call the anbulance, sir... please!' – she said almost histericaly, holding her face between the palms of her hands and looking completely lost.
'It's all right, officer... it's just an abdominal convulsion... there is no need for emergency, I should have stayed home, it's my fault...' – I responded quickly realising where all of this might end. I tried to stand up and she helped me eagerly.
'Oh, you scared me to death... mom sent me after you when she found out you were not in your room!' – she said with harsh voice. 'What a bitch' – crossed my mind as I improvised my safe way out of that potentialy horrible prospect of having a zero-ground in a police station...
'I'm back from Iraq... Basra... I'm not the only one from my battallion with simptoms like this... seizures, convulsions... first they thought it was PTSD... then something organic... or some kind of intoxication... I just want to go home... sis, help me please...' – I asked her grabing her firmly around her neck with my arm and starting to push her down the street.
'Thank you for your consern, sir... I go through this every day... not a problem. I'll be fine... I'll be fine...'
The policeman, young man of my age was silent for a while... and then he said –'I know you will...' – and saluted us in a military way. She saluted back as I pulled her away from him.
'OK... is it really meds or what...' – she asked without any intention to get loose from my gripp. I held her tight, slowly becoming able to bread normally and to straithen my back.
'I'm not gonna hurt you... I'm gonna kill you as soon... oh, fuck! Here it comes...' – I said leading her towards the bench at the edge of the park.
'What now? You have seisures or what? What is comming...' – she asked a little bit worried though I almost reliesed her from my hug.
'I dropped some acid... OK? I don't really know how much... it was in a liquid form... took one drop half an hour ago... and the onset is too fast... and too hard, so I took far, far too much... I don't wanna think about that. Fuck... ' – I said as my world started turning yellow and traffic lights began to melt...
'Oh... now I get it... ha, ha, ha... I would really like to read your statement about being brutally attacked by a girl... she turned on me, tuned me in and dropped me out... ha, ha...
this is good... and you're a freaky creature... Basra? Isn't that a British part... and I saluted a policeman... ha, ha... half an hour ago I found a condom in my boyfriends self help book... some tantra shit he was trieing to pull out... and I'm on pills, man... I'm on fucking pills, you get it? Name's Martha... so... I might stay and try to keep you out of trouble, OK... I mean... I did give you a kick start, ha ha ha...' – I heard her and her laughter somehow blew the fear away... and that was... oh, so good.
'I'm Harvey... I think' – I heard myself speaking at that very moment when time seized to exist as coherence label of my perception...
'Harvey? Don't tell me... you're a pooka, ha ha ha...' – asked a girl with caledioscop eyes.
Post je objavljen 10.01.2008. u 00:52 sati.