Viola: Director's cut

Zadatak na Twitteru bio je jednostavan: napisati sadržaj opere u 140 znakova. Hahahaha, ja sam se baš dobro nasmijala, nadam se da ćete i vi (doduše, treba znati engleski). Ovo su neke umotvorine:

Bluebeard’s Castle
- Here’s my castle. Are you afraid? No, I’m going to open all those damn doors! Are you afraid? No, let me in! Who’s that? Oh shit.

- What’s behind the door? Open it. (he does.) Oh shit! No, it’s cool, I still love you. (x6) And door 7? (shows her.) Oh HELL no.

Carmen
- The bull doesn’t win. Neither does anyone else.

- If a cigarette doesn’t kill you, the girl who made it will…

- Don Jose: I hate Carmen. I love Carmen! I miss Carmen… I hate Carmen! Knife.


Dialogues of the Carmelites
- Blanche becomes a nun. Aristocrats and nuns go to the guillotine. Nun survive. (Actually one nun survives.)

Don Carlos
King marries French girl. His son has hots for girl. Son becomes rebel. Heretics get burned. One eyed woman steals box with secret info in it. Son rescued by Grandpa’s possible ghost. Audience confused by ending.

- he’s in love with his new mother. Affairs of state are greater than affairs of the heart. Questions will be asked.

- He loves her, but she’s forced to marry his father, the king. He sides with the rebels. Beware the grand inquisitor!

Don Giovanni
- randy young man sleeps with lots of girls and gets his comeuppance from a statue.

- Ok, here’s one: Rake kills man. Man’s statue kills rake.

Dido and Aeneas
- Why not marry Aneas? Good idea. “Zeus says: dump her” Ok, will do. Psst, let’s sneak outta here. Jilted? I’ll just kill myself.

I Pagliaci
- Wife’s infidelity no laughing matter for clown. Puts on his costume and kills her. The play is over. Actors have feelings too.

Il Travatore
- Azuc: Oops Wrong baby

La Boheme
A bunch of bohemians. Is that a cold hand? Cough, cough. Forsake love. Cough, cough. Regain love. Cough, cough. Dead.

La Nozze de Figaro
- Count wishes he Susanna had; his wife is sad, his servant mad, a mezzo plays a lusty lad. Switcheroo exposes cad, finale he admits he’s bad.


La Traviata
- V>TB. Has party. Shacks up with A. G meddles . V dumps A. Has party. A freaks. V=TB, faints. A&V reunite but TB>V. Curtain.

courtsean loves young playboy. dad begs: pls leave son. she does, thy fight, he leaves. she gets sick. he rtns for 1 final song.

- She resists, but falls in love. She marries, moves to the country. Her money: spent. Her husband: fooled. She coughs. She dies.

- The only man she ever loved, and she gives him up, so she won’t dishonor his family. Cough, cough, she’s dying.


Pelleas et Mélisande
- Nothing happens; Mélisande dies.

The Ring

Girls lose gold, incest, sword, Ride, fire, son is hero, fates, betrayal, stabbing, more fire, throw ring in the water, place burns anyway

- You ruined my life. Hey, let’s drink this. We’re in love. Ecstasy! Shit, we’re busted. Ok, let’s just die together.


Netko od kolega mi jednom reče: Gledao sam tu operu i bilo je kao da gledam sapunicu: "Volim te, Ne volim te, Ubit ću te! Ups!..." Pa eto....