zaustavite zemlju - silazim

It was the night before Bozic and all through the kuca,
The air smelled of spicy sarma and rakija vruca.
By the dimnjak the čarape were hung kind krivo,
In hopes that Djed bozicnjak would soon bring me some pivo.
Tata was in his soba and he was hrkao pretty hard,
I guess he was tired from stealing the jelka from my neighbor's backyard.
Mama was in the kuhinja cooking like a fool, Adding just the right
količina of Vegeta to the juha and fazol.
When out on the lawn there arose such galama, Tata yelled from his
room "Pa dobro, koji je kurac vama!"
There was a kucanje on the front door with such a loud barrage, I
yelled through the window "This is a Croatian house...come in through
the garage!" And standing in the garaža right next to my car, Was my drunk Tetak
Joza coming home from the bar. "Ajde, odi spavat," I told him with might, Ain't nobody gonna ruin my chances of vidjeti djed bozicnjak tonight.
About two sata later I heard a buka downstairs, So I jumped from my
krevet to see who was there.Standing by the jelka and eating some leftover pizza, Was good ol' Djed bozicnjak reeking of homemade sljivovica!
He was all dressed in red and big as an ox, And wore some brown
sandale along with black socks.
Smelling like a gypsy that's been pijan for days, He wasn't what I
expected...I was zapravo amazed.
"U pizdu materinu, kako mrzim ovaj posao," he said, And then I think
he promrmljao something about his zena and how he wished she was dead.
He put the presents under the jelka while zvizdao a Christmas beat,
They were all wrapped up kind'a shitty with the paper vrecice from zupanijska Street.
12 carape for me and 12 for my brother,
3 pairs of gace for my dad and a can of turska kava for my mother.
This Croatian Santa was švorc...he was nothing like the fable, I
should of known it when he maznuo my pack of cigare from the table.
I yelled "Hey!" as djed bozicnjak turned around like a car, Throwing his
čarapa sa kamina at me as if it were a ninja star.
The look in his očima was nothing but fright, He said "Jebo ti pas
mater" and zbrisao out of sight.Up through the dimnjak I heard a loud shriek, djed bozicnjak had just prdnuo like some wild bik. He got in his kaput, made for hladne zime, And he yelled at his jelene, ime po ime. "Naprijed Marko i Darko, Petar i Ante, Ajde Josip
i Nenad, Ivo i Mate..."
And then he yelled, "Ajdemo brzo, moramo poc,"
SRETAN BOZIC SVIMA i SVIMA LAKU NOC!!!

Helou



evo uhvatila sam mal vremena da neš napišem da mi se ne usmrdi ovaj ispod post koji tu stoji cijelu vječnost… u zadnje vrijeme neam bash puno slobodnog vremena, a kad imam samo bi spavala izlezavala, ma, šta ja to pričam… poznato je to vama jel?
evo sad sam upalila mjuzu ( neam nis za učit) (serem, imam, al nedaaaa mi se) i to prljavo kazaliste… yes… inače bijo tu jedan koncert škoro i oni. al sve već znate, missneshvaćena vam je sve ispričala… zraka jedva da je bilo, vruće ko u paklu, ja, s blagom upalom sinusa, zavrsila polugola, mokra. ma koma. al isplatilo se, ipak su to prljavci.
i mislim ima neš što mi se svaki put dogodi. ovak, imam prirodno kofrčavu kosu, al to nisu one lijepe filmske loknice neg neke čudne spirale, sve se nepravilno kovrča ma griva(inače sam lavica u horoskopu pa i nije previse čudno), no to nije bed, mogu ja nju kolko tolko izravnat. ali, na dan sv.Prljavaca ja oprala kosu i odem na koncert a tamo - sparina, vlazan zrak, a, a, moja kosa… bolje da ne pričam… neopisivo… ko ovca! ma ovca mi nije ni do koljena… i onda sam bar nekolko dana morala tak izgledat jer nemogu svaki drugi dan kosu prat. evo i sinoc sam ju oprala a danas isla sa starim do vinkovaca a on puši puši puši jebote ko dimnjak je i fala bogu moja kosa smrdi na crveni marlboro il kak se već piše…
sranje!

ček sam malo da vidim rezulat. igra dinamoooooooooo… jebote sigurno gubimo. aj saću ja.
jeboteeeeeeeeee 55 minuta 33 sekunda 1(skoro 2):0 za stuttgart. aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa (sad vrištim)

oke skulirana sam.
idemo dalje

danas moje omiljeno biće u svemiru (jedno od) ima rođoš. sestrična. pikavica. ima 5 god. mala je medena, obozavam ju. i ona ima kovrčavu kosu. el znate onu reklamu di ona mama trci za malim plavim djetetom po stanu i onda se češljaju? mislim da je za neki šampone moja luce je ista ta mala. samo u nešto tamnijoj verziji. i tvrdoglava je ko ta mala. dosla ja do njih tam i sva vesela derem se sretan rodendan i te pizdarije a ona veli dobro! haha… pitam ja nju sta je… kaze ona nisam bas raspolozena da budem rodendan! mos si mislit… prcoljak od čovjeka ti to kaze… a zapravo ima pravo. kolko puta ja il svi mi nismo raspolozeni da imamo rodos… kud bas danas a? oke meni je rodendan na ljeto pa je to podnosljivo al da mi je sad u ovo sugavo razdoblje godine kad je najbolje crkavat a ne tulumarit mislim da bi ga odgodila koji mjesec il bi promjenila datum rodenja ko ime… jel se to moŽe?

e da neće vrijeme jos dugo crkotina, ide bozic, jupi! al opet će postat crknuto.
anyway, sad već cijeli grad blica od lampica, kuglica, mašnica, moram priznat nekako sve izgleda bezveze, osim nekih zgrada trgovina i nase bajne tvrđe koje su baš jednostavno okićene al imaš taj bozicni feeling, sve izgleda fuj. u jednom izlogu blicaju crvene jako brzo, onda vidis plave mašnice, pa u idućem izlogu zajedno sa gaćama, čarapama i dekama blicaju šarene lampice na zelenom celofanu koji predstavlja bozicnu jelku jel, pa lampe veličine lopte koje svijetle ko ulična rasvjeta a nakon svake treće dvije ne rade… ma to bi trebalo zakonom zabranit!!! … i na sta taj grad sad liči?!?!?!?! ETO STA MENE UZRUJAVA

fino!
ček ček…. kad je dinamo zabio gol?!?!?!?!?!!!!?!?!?!?!?!?!???!!!??!?!?!?!!!????!?! yeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeees!!!!
fak fak fak 75. min opet švabe dali gol dinamo, ovaj u… SORRY, padežologija mi je u komi.
da… što još htjedoh reć… niš,niš, svršila sam!

pusek
by: fedra