Life is a bitch...and God is a woman!!!

Ona pjesma mi je već pomalo monotona, pa evo nešto novo...!

Ma daj škola je glupost izmišljena od ljudi koji više nisu mogli podnositi djecu doma pa su ih nekam poslali. Da, ali tu se otvara pitanje kam? Za vrtić su pre veliki, a i uskoro ulaze u pubertet...tu bu vraga i nedao Bog da budu doma da ih se mora slušati kak 24 sata na dan kvočkaju i kipaju kaj im treba i kaj bude im trebalo. Starci bi trebali znati da škola nema smisla! Ljudi dal znate koja je razlika između škole i zatvora? Ako si u zatvoru znaš zakaj tam sediš!



Profesoca Mišak je stara škola tip žene u već jako zlatnim godinama, koja me više puta skoro pogodila autom, što me malo zabrinjava...
Kod nje se sve more delati pa i kartati poker pod satom, jesti, gađati se svime(doslovce), pa čak i prošetati školom. Samo se treba paziti da dirac ne dokuri inaće je bed i bubnjići stradaju.

Ali opet nebremo sve to gledati s loše strane. Tu se razvijaju prijateljstva, rađaju se ljubavi i slažeju se dobre gluposti na račun profa.
Mislim da imam jedan od boljih razreda i nebi ga mjenjal za ništ... možda sam par ljudi!
Razredne šale, gluposti, redovita dernjava, uništavanje školske imovine i još mnogo aktivnosti ko igranje nogometa na hodniku s ping-pong lopticom(jednom sam prilikom čak i prijateljici nagazil gležanj tak jako, da je poprimil ugodnu , a opet bolnu plavu boju; sori Pape!), skrivanje Drevenu kape i torbe, itd...
Cuganje poslje polugodišta i fešte na kraju godine, kavice poslje škole petkom su stvari koje bi mi sigurno falile da sad nestanu.
Prijatelji ili takozvani kolege su tu da te tješe vesele se s tobom, daju ti potporu i na kraju žive s tobom 4 godine, 6 sati dnevno u istoj prostoriji s istim ljudima, ali je za izdržati...

Evo ovo vam je jedan od naših izleta...kojih nema mnogo ali opet:


Pjeva se "Lipe cvatu" i rastura na Božićnom sajmu u Zagrebu!


A ovo je nus-pojava alkohola...


Ovo je zakon slika... Cici i ja(Cici je onaj grdi i viši) s Nestle maskotom...nisam siguran, ali mi se čini da sam čul psovku iz odjela ka smo ga zagrlili...hehehe

A sad za finale Stari grad u našem malom, baroknom gradu Varaždinu(poznat po cuganju)!
Recite dal je bila fešta ili je bilo bomba:


Tak sve počinje i tek se otvaraju flaše...svi trijezni!


Počelo je počelo...e Cici kaj se rajcaš na taj zid, daj ga pusti na miru!!!


Kaj je Žec... tak si pijani da ga nebreš najti?!


Ovaj pa je tak pijani da valjda ne vidi pred sobom...sigurno....

I tak smo mi jako veseli razred!!!
Nema boljih od 2.n.!!!

1. Sing the Batman theme incessantly.

2. In the memo field of all your checks, write "for sensual massage."

3. Specify that your drive-through order is "to go."

4. Learn Morse code, and have conversations with friends in public consisting entirely of "Beeeep Bip Bip Beeeep Bip..."

5. If you have a glass eye, tap on it occasionally with your pen while talking to others.

6. Amuse yourself for endless hours by hooking a camcorder to your TV and then pointing it at the screen.

7. Speak only in a "robot" voice.

8. Push all the flat Lego pieces together tightly.

9. Start each meal by conspicuously licking all your food, and announce that this is so no one will "swipe your grub."

10. Leave the copy machine set to reduce 200%, extra dark, 17 inch paper, 99 copies.

11. Stomp on little plastic ketchup packets.

12. Sniffle incessantly.

13. Leave your turn signal on for fifty miles.

14. Name your dog "Dog."

15. Insist on keeping your car windshield wipers running in all weather conditions "to keep them tuned up."

16. Reply to everything someone says with "that's what YOU think."

17. Claim that you must always wear a bicycle helmet as part of your "astronaut training."

18. Declare your apartment an independent nation, and sue your neighbors upstairs for "violating your airspace."

19. Forget the punchline to a long joke, but assure the listener it was a "real hoot."

20. Follow a few paces behind someone, spraying everything they touch with a can of Lysol.

21. Practice making fax and modem noises.

22. Highlight irrelevant information in scientific papers and "cc:" them to your boss.

23. Make beeping noises when a large person backs up.

24. Invent nonsense computer jargon in conversations, and see if people play along to avoid the appearance of ignorance.

25. Erect an elaborate network of ropes in your backyard, and tell the neighbors you are a "spider person."

26. Finish all your sentences with the words "in accordance with prophesy."

27. Wear a special hip holster for your remote control.

28. Do not add any inflection to the end of your sentences, producing awkward silences with the impression that you'll be saying more any moment.

29. Signal that a conversation is over by clamping your hands over your ears.

30. Disassemble your pen and "accidentally" flip the ink cartridge across the room.

31. Give a play-by-play account of a person's every action in a nasal Howard Cosell voice.

32. Holler random numbers while someone is counting.

33. Adjust the tint on your TV so that all the people are green, and insist to others that you "like it that way."

34. Drum on every available surface.

35. Staple papers in the middle of the page.

36. Ask 1-800 operators for dates.

37. Produce a rental video consisting entirely of dire FBI copyright warnings.

38. Sew anti-theft detector strips into people's backpacks.

39. Hide dairy products in inaccessible places.

40. Write the surprise ending to a novel on its first page.

41. Set alarms for random times.

42. Order a side of pork rinds with your filet mignon.

43. Instead of Gallo, serve Night Train next Thanksgiving.

44. Publicly investigate just how slowly you can make a "croaking" noise

45. Honk and wave to strangers.

46. Dress only in clothes colored Hunter's Orange.

47. Change channels five minutes before the end of every show.

48. Tape pieces of "Sweating to the Oldies" over climactic parts of rental movies.

49. Wear your pants backwards.

50. Decline to be seated at a restaurant, and simply eat their complimentary mints by the cash register.

51. Begin all your sentences with "ooh la la!"

52. ONLY TYPE IN UPPERCASE.

53. only type in lowercase.

54. dont use any punctuation either

55. Buy a large quantity of orange traffic cones and reroute whole streets.

56. Pay for your dinner with pennies.

57. Tie jingle bells to all your clothes.

58. Repeat everything someone says, as a question.

59. Write "X - BURIED TREASURE" in random spots on all of someone's roadmaps.

60. Inform everyone you meet of your personal Kennedy assassination/UFO/ O.J. Simpson conspiracy theories.

61. Repeat the following conversation a dozen times: "Do you hear that?" "What?" "Never mind, it's gone now."

62. Light road flares on a birthday cake.

63. Wander around a restaurant, asking other diners for their parsley.

64. Leave tips in Bolivian currency.

65. Demand that everyone address you as "Conquistador."

66. At the laundromat, use one dryer for each of your socks.

67. When Christmas caroling, sing "Jingle Bells, Batman smells" until physically restrained.

68. Wear a cape that says "Magnificent One."

69. As much as possible, skip rather than walk.

70. Stand over someone's shoulder, mumbling, as they read.

71. Pretend your computer's mouse is a CB radio, and talk to it.

72. Try playing the William Tell Overture by tapping on the bottom of your chin. When nearly done, announce "no, wait, I messed it up," and repeat.

73. Drive half a block.

74. Inform others that they exist only in your imagination.

75. Ask people what gender they are.

76. Lick the filling out of all the Oreos, and place the cookie parts back in the tray.

77. Cultivate a Norwegian accent. If Norwegian, affect a Southern drawl.

78. Routinely handcuff yourself to furniture, informing the curious that you don't want to fall off "in case the big one comes." 7

9. Deliberately hum songs that will remain lodged in co-workers' brains such as "Feliz Navidad," the Archies' "Sugar" or the Mr. Rogers theme song.

80. While making presentations, occasionally bob your head like a parakeet.

81. Lie obviously about trivial things such as the time of day.

82. Leave your Christmas lights up and lit until September.

83. Change your name to "John Aaaaasmith" for the great glory of being first in the phone book. Claim it's a Hawaiian name, and demand that people pronounce each "a."

84. Sit in your front yard pointing a hair dryer at passing cars to see if they slow down.

85. Chew on pens that you've borrowed.

86. Wear a LOT of cologne.

87. Listen to 33rpm records at 45rpm speed, and claim the faster speed is necessary because of your "superior mental processing."

88. Sing along at the opera.

89. Mow your lawn with scissors.

90. At a golf tournament, chant "swing-batabatabata-suhWING-batter!"

91. Ask the waitress for an extra seat for your "imaginary friend."

92. Go to a poetry recital and ask why each poem doesn't rhyme.

93. Ask your co-workers mysterious questions, and then scribble their answers in a notebook. Mutter something about "psychological profiles."

94. Stare at static on the TV and claim you can see a "magic picture."

95. Select the same song on the jukebox fifty times.

96. Never make eye contact.

97. Never break eye contact.

98. Construct elaborate "crop circles" in your front lawn.

99. Construct your own pretend "tricorder," and "scan" people with it, announcing the results.

100. Make appointments for the 31st of September.

101. Invite lots of people to other people's parties.

Svako ko zna engleski i ovo je pročital nek napiše dal je bomba ili je zakon...

Ljudi dal vam se ikad desilo da ste se vezali za nekog a onda, iz čistog mira prekid?
Meni se prije dva dana i najradije bi se ubil, ali kak mi prijatelji govore nije vrijedna toga.....
Počelo je sastankom na icq-u uz objašnjenje da je hitno....poruka je glasila:"Dojdi na net."
Dobre volje i ne okljevajući ja se sjurim na komp upalim icq i čekam....
Dođe tada ona...razgovor ko razgovor, no odjednom napiše ona:"Trebamo razgovarati, ali u 4 oka!"
(za muške; dal i vi mrzite taj vjećiti kliše?).
Nakon pet minuta meni sjedne u glavu kaj je, ali mi nije bilo ni na kraj pameti zakaj je?
Nađemo se tak u četvrtak njoj poslje škole, a meni prije engleskog u Lavri(dobar kafić)!
Pogledamo se u oći i ona poćne s prokletim, a opet vjećitim izlikama ljepšeg spola koje im nekak ne ponestaju.
Ja šutim i glumim mačo..nije bed velim malo se pospominamo i zakljućimo da budemo ostali dobri prijatelji(kliše na drugu).
Malo še šeće društvo još po gradu i u nerazgovjetnom englesko-njemačkom žargonu pokušavam sakriti bol...uspjevam!
Dolazim doma poslje engleskog, složim si krevet, legnem se u njega i buljim u strop, pa da citram malo hladno pivo:"sve se bijeli, ko u bolnici..."!
Izbezumljen pokušavam otkriti zašto, kako, čemu, ali odgovora nema...probao0 sam ga potražit u srcu, ali ni njega nije bilo...zašto?
Jer mi je rasuto ležalo po podu i još kucajući njezono ime polako je odumiralo....

Sada u prsima nema nićega...praznina, skoro da i vidim kroz nju...ali jedno znam...
MARTINA VOLIO SAM TE VIŠE OD BOGA.....