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13.07.2007., petak

Početak

Sve je bilo super.Imala sam život kakav sam poželjeti mogla.Bila sam jedinica,znači bila sam sve na svijetu svojim roditeljima i obitelji.Život je tekao svojim tokom bez trzaja i stanki.Samo sreća i ljubav.Kad sad razmišljam malo presavršeno.
Sve do moje sedme godine.Odjednom su se niodkuda gomilale suze.Život je postao zapravo stvaran jer sve ono prije bila je samo bajka.I toliko sam se trudila shvatiti koji život je stvaran i u što trebam vjerovati.Trebam li slušati maminu stranu priće ili tatinu.Ionako ni danas ne znam u što da vjerujem.Više me nije ni briga.Moji su se roditelji rastali i to se više ne može vratiti.Mama je često plakala,tatu nije bilo briga,al kako god sam slušala priće stalno bih mjenjala stranu.Bilo je to previše za mene,za djevojčicu drugoga razreda.Moj savršeni svijet se srušio kao kula od karata.Ništa više nije bilo isto,samo sam se iz dana u dan prezirala,pitajući se jesam li mogla što učiniti.I nikako da si oprostim to da sam bila samo djete.
Najbolje od svega je to što sam uvjeravala sve oko sebe da mene to ne smeta.Zapravo više i ne,al sam dugo vremena patila.Ipak sve što sam poznavala nestalo je...nestalo zauvijek...
Nikada nikome nisam rekla kako sam vidjela tatu da je udario mamu.Ni sama nisam vjerovala u to.Pala je na krevet sva u suzama.Voljela ga je,samo sam to znala.No oprostila sam,osprostila sam mu sve,no nikada,nikada nisam oprostila sebi.To je bio razlog zbog kojeg se moj život pretvorio u pakao.Tu noć...





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Ovaj blog sadrži jednu pricu...nazalost istinitu...prica o zivotu jedne narkomanke...cure koja se sama vratila natrag u svijet...i sada zivi...o curi za koju se nije znalo cak ni sumnjalo da se bori s paklom droge...da se pokusava ubiti i da vise ne moze izdrzati sama...


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Metallica

=(

Good bey memories
From the past

Good bey day
Night grows fast

Good bey love
Hello pain

I lost my hope
But I suffer the same

Wishing on stars
For the angels
To take me away

Saying good bey to the body
But here it still remains






Iako zelim ostati anonimna mislim da trebate znati nesto o meni.
Imam 17 godina.Slušam rock,punk i metal.Ono sto mrzim je:umisljenost,laz,tracanje i narodnjake.No ne pada mi na pamet kritizirati nekoga zbog vrste muzike koju sluša ta osoba.Ne vjerujem u ljubav.Volim crnu boju...

LIFE IS A SHIT...WHEN YOU ARE IN IT!

my heart is broken into 10,000 thousand pieces or more
cause you hurt me so much
when i found out i wasn't your one true life
it was with someone else
i cried every day every night
cause i loved you so much
why does your heart get broken everytime you fall in love???
well you cannot back down to the one you found
you say you regret everything
should have thought about that when you threw me out of your mind

i should have listen to my friends
when they said you're nothing
it wouldn't last to the end babe
never thought it would
i thought you were different
bye my love forever i'll miss you
we'll you're in the past now
you cannot back down to the one you found
you say you regret everything
should have thought about that when you threw me out of your mind
you're out of my life now



And I wanna believe you,
When you tell me that it'll be ok,
Ya I try to believe you,
But I don't

When you say that it's gonna be,
It always turns out to be a different way,
I try to believe you,
Not today, today, today, today, today...

[Chorus:]

I don't know how to feel,
tomorrow, tomorrow,
I don't know what to say,
tomorrow, tomorrow
Is a different day

It's always been up to you,
It's turning around,
It's up to me,
I'm gonna do what I have to do,
just do

Gimme a lil time,
Leave me alone a little while,
Maybe it's not too late,
not today, today, today, today, today...

[Chorus:]

I don't know how to feel,
tomorrow, tomorrow,
I don't know what to say,
tomorrow, tomorrow
Is a different day

And I know I'm not ready,
Maybe tomorrow

And I wanna believe you,
When you tell me that it'll be ok,
Ya I try to believe you,
Not today, today, today, today, today...

Tomorrow it may change [4x]



Im talking out my hair
Im pulling at my clothes
Im trying to keep my cool
I know it shows
Im staring at my feet
My checks are turning red
Im searching for the words inside my head

[Pre-Chorus]
(Cause) Im feeling nervous
Trying to be so perfect
Cause I know youre worth it
Youre worth it
Yeah

[Chorus]
If I could say what I want to say
Id say what about you
Be with you every night
Am I squeezing you too tight
If I could say what I want to see
I want to see you go down
On one knee
Marry me today
Yes, Im wishing my life away
With these things Ill never say

It dont do me any good
Its just a waste of time
What use is it to you
Whats on my mind
If aint coming out
Were not going anywhere
So why cant I just tell you that I care

[Pre-Chorus]

[Chorus]

Whats wrong with my tongue
These words keep slipping away
I stutter, I stumble off
Like Ive got nothing to say

[Pre-Chorus]

Yes Im wishing my life away with these things Ill never say
If I could say what I want to say
Id say what about you
Be with you every night
Am I squeezing you too tight
If I could say what I want to see
I want to see you go down
On one knee
Marry me today
Yes, Im wishing my life away
With these things Ill never say
These things Ill never say





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