zaustavite zemlju - silazim

It was the night before Bozic and all through the kuca,
The air smelled of spicy sarma and rakija vruca.
By the dimnjak the čarape were hung kind krivo,
In hopes that Djed bozicnjak would soon bring me some pivo.
Tata was in his soba and he was hrkao pretty hard,
I guess he was tired from stealing the jelka from my neighbor's backyard.
Mama was in the kuhinja cooking like a fool, Adding just the right
količina of Vegeta to the juha and fazol.
When out on the lawn there arose such galama, Tata yelled from his
room "Pa dobro, koji je kurac vama!"
There was a kucanje on the front door with such a loud barrage, I
yelled through the window "This is a Croatian house...come in through
the garage!" And standing in the garaža right next to my car, Was my drunk Tetak
Joza coming home from the bar. "Ajde, odi spavat," I told him with might, Ain't nobody gonna ruin my chances of vidjeti djed bozicnjak tonight.
About two sata later I heard a buka downstairs, So I jumped from my
krevet to see who was there.Standing by the jelka and eating some leftover pizza, Was good ol' Djed bozicnjak reeking of homemade sljivovica!
He was all dressed in red and big as an ox, And wore some brown
sandale along with black socks.
Smelling like a gypsy that's been pijan for days, He wasn't what I
expected...I was zapravo amazed.
"U pizdu materinu, kako mrzim ovaj posao," he said, And then I think
he promrmljao something about his zena and how he wished she was dead.
He put the presents under the jelka while zvizdao a Christmas beat,
They were all wrapped up kind'a shitty with the paper vrecice from zupanijska Street.
12 carape for me and 12 for my brother,
3 pairs of gace for my dad and a can of turska kava for my mother.
This Croatian Santa was švorc...he was nothing like the fable, I
should of known it when he maznuo my pack of cigare from the table.
I yelled "Hey!" as djed bozicnjak turned around like a car, Throwing his
čarapa sa kamina at me as if it were a ninja star.
The look in his očima was nothing but fright, He said "Jebo ti pas
mater" and zbrisao out of sight.Up through the dimnjak I heard a loud shriek, djed bozicnjak had just prdnuo like some wild bik. He got in his kaput, made for hladne zime, And he yelled at his jelene, ime po ime. "Naprijed Marko i Darko, Petar i Ante, Ajde Josip
i Nenad, Ivo i Mate..."
And then he yelled, "Ajdemo brzo, moramo poc,"
SRETAN BOZIC SVIMA i SVIMA LAKU NOC!!!