mommy, mommy jokes
Be warned. You'll almost definitly go to hell for laughing at these.
Son: Mommy, Mommy! My head hurts!
Mom: Shut up and get away from the dart board!
Son: Mommy, mommy, can I lick the bowl?
Mom: Shut up and flush.
Son:Mommy, Mommy! What happened to all your scabs?
mom:Shut up and eat your cornflakes!
Son: Mommy, Mommy! When will we have this nice yellow pudding again?
Mom: Shut up, you know that grandma's leg is no longer infested.
Son: Mommy, Mommy! Why is daddy running away?
Mom: Shut up, and help me reload the shotgun!
Son: Mommy, Mommy! Can I play in the sandbox?
Mom: Not until I find a better place to bury Daddy.
Son: Mommy, Mommy, I want to play with Grandpa now!
Mom: Keep quiet, the coffin stays closed today!
Son: Mommy, mommy, are you sure this is how to learn to swim?
Mom: Shut up and get back in the sack!
Son: Mommy, Mommy! Why do I have to hop everywhere?
Mom: Shut up or I'll chop off the other leg!
Son: Mommy, Mommy, I don't like running in circles!
Mom: Shut up, or I'll nail your other foot to the floor.
Son: Mommy, Mommy! Can I go to the toilet?
Mom: Yes Johnny I'll take you in a minute.
Son: Can Granny take me?
Mom: Why?
Son: Her hand shakes.
Son: Mommy, Mommy! Grandpa's going out!
Mom: Well throw some more gasoline on him then
Son: Mommy, Mommy, can I wear a bra now? I'm 16..
Mom: Shut up Albert....
Son: Mommy, Mommy! I can't breathe!
Mom: Good, it's working.
Son: Mommy, Mommy! can I have a bike for Christmas?
Mom: Nope. You already have your wheelchair.
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