Gorile u izmaglici!!!

petak, 05.01.2007.

Pusenje

Ja sam okorjeli nepusac..i dosad nisam nigdje cul negu ozbiljnu tezu ili za ili protiv pusenja..dok nisam naletil na ovo..uglavnom Denis Leary je zakon, a evo par citata iz filma "No cure for cancer"

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Denis Leary: Folks, I'd like to sing a song about the American Dream. About me. About you. The way our American hearts beat down in the bottom of our chests. About the special feeling we get in the cockles of our hearts, maybe below the cockles, maybe in the sub-cockle area. Maybe in the liver. Maybe in the kidneys. Maybe even in the colon, we don't know.

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Denis Leary: [about cigarettes] The filter's the best part. That's where they put the heroin.

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Denis Leary: We live in a country where John Lennon takes six bullets in the chest, Yoko Ono was standing right next to him, not ONE FUCKING BULLET! Explain that to me God!!!

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Denis Leary: It doesn't matter how big the warnings on the cigarettes are; you could have a black pack, with a skull and crossbones on the front, called TUMORS, and smokers would be around the block going, "I can't wait to get my hands on these fucking things! I bet ya get a tumor as soon as you light up!"

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Denis Leary: I'm sick and tired of our generation being called the TV generation. What do you expect? We watched Lee Harvey Oswald get his brains blown out all over. How could we change the channel after that?


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Denis Leary: I recently read an interview in Rolling Stone, where he advocated that people should not do drugs, KEITH RICHARDS said that we should not do drugs. Keith, we can't do anymore drugs, BECAUSE YOU ALREADY FUCKIN' DID THEM ALL! There's none left, we have to wait until you die so we can smoke you're ashes, alright!


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Denis Leary: I can remember a time in this country when men were proud to get cancer, goddammit! It was a sign of manhood! John Wayne had cancer twice. Second time, they took out one of his lungs. He said, "Take 'em both! I don't fuckin' need 'em! I'll grow gills and breathe like a fish!"

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Denis Leary: We tried to be nice to you non-smokers. We fucking tried. OK? You wanted your own sections in the restaurants. We gave you that, huh. But that wasn't enough for you. Then you wanted the airplanes. We gave you the whole godamn plane! You happy now? I will guarantee you if the plane is going down, the first announcement you're gonna hear is: "Folks, this is your Captain speaking. Look, uhm, light 'em up, 'cause we're going down, okay. I got a carton of Camel non-filters, I'll see you on the ground."

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Denis Leary: I'm gonna get one of those tracheotomies. So I can smoke two cigarettes at the same time. I'm gonna get nine tracheotomies all the way around my neck. I'll be Tracheotomy Man! "He can smoke a pack at a time! He's Tracheotomy Man!"

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Denis Leary: Smoking takes ten years off your life. Well it's the ten worst years, isn't it folks? It's the ones at the end! It's the wheelchair, kidney dialysis, adult diaper fucking years. You can have those years! We don't want 'em, alright?
- 14:03 - idiotiziranje (10) - pablish - #

subota, 30.12.2006.

Kenjara

Nema vece ljubavi od muskarca i njegove WC skoljke..ta ljubav traje vec stoljecima,kad je zapocela tesko je reci,al jedno je sigurno..kad si u kurcu i cijeli svijet ti se rusi, najbolje mjesto za opustanje je zahod.
Tamo nema vike..telefona..mobitela.spanjolskih sapunica... vec samo tisina..spokojstvo, mir i najdrazi casopis.
Tesko je reci koja je najbolja WC soljka na svijetu, jer ipak ima razlicitih ukusa.. zato sam odlucio prenjeti misljenje jednog od najvecih televizijskih eksperta za zahod.


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Al: When I was growing up, I had two dreams. One was being an astronaut and landing on the planet Jane Mansfield. The other was having a bathroom all to myself. Well, Daddy got blown off course and had to crash on a much darker planet. (Al touches Peggy's head.) But family, I'm going to realize my second dream. I'm going to build a bathroom -- the greatest bathroom in the world. And I want you to know something, all of you -- NOBODY USES THAT BATHROOM BUT ME.


Al: When I was a boy I told myself when I grew up I would have one thing. A toilet bowl like my dad had.

Peggy: I thought it was a head like a peanut. He had one of those, too.

Al: you're not going to ruin my moment, Peg. Now stand back and feast your eyes on... this!


Kelly: is it just me, or is that a toilet?
Al: Not just a toilet... a FERGUSON. The King of bowls!


Al: Bud, sit down. Let me tell you the story of the Ferguson. Now these babies were made in Maine, you know, at the little Ferguson factory. It's the Stradivarius of toilets. And my Dad could play it like a violin.
Yup, I'll never forget the time my dad took me to Maine to visit the factory. I had to go to the bathroom. And I begged him to pull into a truck stop. He said no, wait until we get there! It'll be worth it! It was!


Bud: Excuse me, Dad, but a toilet is a toilet.
Al: (grimacing) Bud... the toilets today aren't worthy of the name! They come in designer colors... they're too low! When you flush them, they make this weak, almost apologetic sound. But not the Ferguson. It only comes in white. And when you flush it... BaaaWOOOSH! That's a man's flush, Bud. A Ferguson says, "I'm a toilet. Sit down and give me your best shot." Oh, if only a Ferguson could speak, the tales it would tell!

And now I've got one of my very own!

I just wish... Dad could be ali--- (Al breaks down)



Al: Oh look, Dad, I'm sitting on my own Ferguson! Just like you always knew I would!

The bathroom is a man's sanctuary, a place of rest. When life gives your lemons, you take a big shit. And that's exactly what Al did. After a bad day of selling women's shoes, he would retreat to his bathroom. After wrestling traffic to make it home to his ungrateful wife and kids, he would go and bond with his Ferguson.

Al: Daddy loves you!
Peggy: What does that toilet have that I don't?

Al: A job.


Kelly: Well. Daddy finally finished his bathroom. You know, the living room seems so much bigger without the Ferguson.
Peggy: Yeah... this must be quite a moment for your father. He's in there breaking in the Ferguson as we speak. Must be having fun... he's been in there for over an hour.

Al comes in.

Peggy: How was it, Al?

Al: (Sits down on the couch.) I don't know, Peg. I'm constipated.


Al: This is the worst day of my life. I wonder if this ever happened to Dad?

Peggy: You want me to undercook you some chicken, honey?

Al: No, but thanks anyway, Peg. It'll take something a lot stronger than raw chicken to get me fixed up.

Al turns on the TV.

Announcer: And now stay tuned for the rest of our exciting ABC lineup. Roseanne! Moonlighting! And the award-winning Thirtysomething.

Al nods, picks up a newspaper, puts it under his arm, and heads to the bathroom.


sfx: BaaaWOOOSH!



Al: Now that's a MAN'S flush!
- 15:44 - idiotiziranje (6) - pablish - #

petak, 29.12.2006.

Superman vs Spartak

Neko bi reko da nema smisla usporedjivat to dvoje junaka, jer jedan je stip junak dog drugi povijesna licnost.. al oba dvoje imaju zanimljive filmske adaptacije o cijim se kvalitetama dalo raspravljat. Opet, ni usporedbe filmova nemaju nekog smisla jer su to dva totalno razlicita filma koji su namjenjeni razlictoj publici. Nema smisla ni usporedjivat ko bi od njih bio jaci..al ono sto se moze usporodjivat je njihova frizura..naime oboje imaju trovremenski Taft frizure, uvijek postojane. I dok bi Spartak od Supermena sigurno popusio, njegova frizura je jace kvalitete..nije ju pokvarilo ni rat ni bjezanje od rimljana,a bome i kad su ga razapeli friz je jos uvijek bil tu...dok kad pogledamo Supermena (barem u filmu Superman returns..ostal 4 dijela se vise ni ne sjecam) nije bas tak..istina je, da on leti brzinom nekoliko macha, da se probija kroz vatru, a bome i neke zgrade i friz se drzi..ali, cim se je mal smocila..ode sve u kurac. Koji su razlozi tome, e tu sad postoje dvije verzije..jedna je da; kad se uzme u obzir da je Spartak povijesni film,a Supermen je nesto kao bliska buducnost, da se kvaliteta Tafta godinama pokvarila.. to jest kao i vecina proizvoda, na pocetku je bil dobar, a poslje kad se proslavil sve je otislo u kurac.. drugu veziju podrzavju Supermenovi fanovi,a to je da je zbog blizine kriptonita Supermen oslabio, a samim tim i njegova frizura. Koja od tih dviju verzija je bliza istini ionako zanima samo idiote poput mene..pa ono kog briga...
- 15:03 - idiotiziranje (1) - pablish - #

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