Heretik aka tHe cHanging One

25.12.2006.


Sretan Božić svima koji ga slave, jelte, ipak je danas svatko svoje vjere...
Ovaj blog je u trenutku objave ovog posta star godinu dana, i ja ga zatvaram...
Drago mi je što sam bio dio zajednice, ali ovdje više nemam što tražiti, odlazim...
Hvala svima koji su ovamo dolazili i čitali me, dolazit ću vam ponekad na blog...
Ovaj post ostaje otvoren za komentare...








Heretik over & out...



I will rise again, somewhere...

02:14 --- Reci... (18) --- Ma daj... --- Sjeti se...

28.10.2006.



Have faith, go on, it's all worth the sacrifice...

Why oh why...
Do you have to be so far
Why oh why
Can't I light a spark in your eye

The feelings cannot change,
All the time feels so strange

Why oh why
Am I the one you refuse to see
Why oh why
Can't my heart simply leave me be

These feelings are too strong
Strangling me all along

Why do we have to be...
... strangers...

01:55 --- Reci... (2) --- Ma daj... --- Sjeti se...

21.09.2006.

Zadnji post... zasad... možda se i vratim... jednom... bye & thanx 4 everything ;)



I'm tired of all these glass walls
The broken windows, locked doors
Without your help I can not break
Those barriers between our souls

And once again what have we done
What has gone so wrong this time

All we have built is still somewhere around
Behind a glass wall, awaits to be found

And if you simply can't hold my cold arms
Then how many times will I look in your eyes
And notice the touch that awaits in disguise

And in the end you don't seem like a friend
If you can't simply provide friendly hand
Like hundreds of words have never been said
Just spilled like a seed on cold, barren land

If I'm just another book on your shelf
I'll stay in the shadow
Trapped by myself

Hold a tear on the palm for my broken dreams
Come with me, let's go find our forgotten memories
And hold me... don't let me drown in my tears

22:33 --- Reci... (28) --- Ma daj... --- Sjeti se...

20.08.2006.

Nije baš da mi se da pisati...
Nije baš da će ovo netko čitati...
Ova pjesma nije sada napisana...
Postam ju jer mi ide uz raspoloženje...



A different place
At different time
Same music is played
Love's funeral chime

And once again I can't resist
The tears become sweet
Emotion is a beast

The reason is always
A dead love for me
Cold fingers of silence
Forbid you to see

The hole in my heart is
Not from the pain done
It's only a half of
What has to be One

And once again I can't resist
The tears become sweet
Emotion is a beast

May whole world forgive me
For the cries that I make
Sometimes it's just more than
My weak soul can take

03:33 --- Reci... (20) --- Ma daj... --- Sjeti se...

12.08.2006.

Not my problem?

Eto mene s mora (još prekjučer, ali što je tu je) pa da vam podnesem izvještaj...
Bilo je u najmanju ruku dosadno i melankolično, jer sam išao samo sa starcima...
Ne kažem da su starci loše društvo, jer se ne svađamo, ali falila mi je moja ekipa...
Još se i vrijeme pokvarilo, pa smo došli 3 dana ranije, što mi je drago...
Nego, čemu naslov? E pa... da vam ukratko ispričam o čemu se radi...

Jednom prilikom, dok smo bili u Vodicama, meni je dosadilo sjedit pa sam se dogovorio sa starcima da idem malo prošetat i pojest sladoled, i da se vraćam za pola sata... Onda sam otišao na jedan prilično pust dio rive, našao dok na kojem nije bilo nikog i sjeo na njega... mjesečina na morskoj površini inspirira čovjeka... pogotovo ako imate MP3 player uz sebe, onda je to pravi užitak...
Nakon nekog vremena palo mi je na pamet da odem po taj sladoled... i dođem ja do drugog kraja rive gdje se prodaje, i vidim da su upravo zatvorili... i krenem nazad...
Nakon minutu, dvije naletim na prizor koji me je natjerao da stanem i razmislim... vidio sam curu od kojih 15 godina kako sjedi na rivi i plače, a malobrojni prolaznici se ne obaziru... i mislim si "Šta sad? Ako samo prođem kao svi ubit će me savjest, a ako pokušam pomoći tko zna što će biti..."
I odlučim da ću sjest kraj nje i pitat u čemu je problem, pa kud puklo... i pogledam a mobitel da vidim koliko imam vremena... i jebiga... skužim da već kasnim 2 minute, a baš bi mi sad trebalo da me starci traže u gužvi u turističkom mjestu na drugom kraju države...
Učinio sam to... prošao sam kraj nje i otišao starcima, koji nisu ni primjetili da kasnim headbang

Ova pjesma je za nju, koju nikad nisam i neću upoznati, i koja mi nije dala mira tu večer...



A young, helpless soul
Is what I have found
Abandoned, ignored
By people around

A bare look at your shadow
Awakes tears of my own
And all because to myself
That sorrow is well-known

And when I stepped towards you
The clock showed half past ten
And I still cannot believe
That thing I did just then

I left you in darkness
To weep all alone
Without someone's comfort
One I could've shown

Forgive me things
I've failed to do
In other time
I would help you

00:55 --- Reci... (8) --- Ma daj... --- Sjeti se...

31.07.2006.

Damn... I blew up again :-/

Ode na more ujutro, vraćam se oko 10. ili 11. osmog, nadam se sa više inspiracije i volje za pisanjem, i sa kojom novom pjesmom (nosim teku na more;) jer nisam već mjesec dana ništa pametno napisao...

wave

03:33 --- Reci... (11) --- Ma daj... --- Sjeti se...

26.07.2006.

Ne solite mi pamet...

...zbog ovog posta, on je tu samo da mi sjedi na duši i da me natjera da napišem PRAVI
No comments, please!

12:23 --- Reci... (8) --- Ma daj... --- Sjeti se...

19.07.2006.

Take a look... please!

Evo, po uzoru na svog kolegu i ja ću u post zalijepit ovaj link...
Mrzim kad se ovakve stvari događaju, jer malo što je okrutnije od ovog...

Pročitajte ovo i izvucite neku pouku...

11:39 --- Reci... (22) --- Ma daj... --- Sjeti se...

13.07.2006.

...sorry...

Danas je tako f***** up dan, ne zbog vremena nego zbog mojih grešaka...
Sad bih mogao reći ono klasično: "I'm sorry, I can't be perfect" ali ne želim se skrivati iza svoje nesavršenosti, ipak su tu druge stvari u pitanju...
Iako znam da isprike ne mogu popraviti sve što se događa, moram početi od nečega...
Pa ajmo redom...

Sanja, oprosti, ne znam šta da kažem osim: Zaboravio sam headbang
Kaos, sorry što se ne javljam ova 2 dana, ali nisam kod kuće, stalno sam negdje... nono
Yvonne, oprosti što ne donosim to što bih trebao, razlog je moja lijenost... namcor
Domagoj, druže... long time no type... sorry, ne stignem, ne stignem... no
Tomi, jebiga, kad si ono rekao da je slavlje? I šta treba donijet u subotu? lud
Svi koji čekaju post... i čekaju... i čekaju... dobit ćete nešto smislen ovaj tjedan... yes
Svijete, oprosti mi što igram OGame, jer to je zlo... ali jače je od mene... blabla

00:55 --- Reci... (15) --- Ma daj... --- Sjeti se...

30.06.2006.



First word about the subject
So delicate at moment
Calls old wounds to re-open
Renews the pain and torment

The memories of moments
Misloved, mistimed, misplaced
They force me to remember
That I am not embraced

The first drops come in pairs
As couples of glass night crows
They fly down, hit the carpet
And then the real tide goes

Tears fall like rain of hellfire
That burns my painful eyes
And I can't lie about it
I love, no cheats, no lies

Love leaves no place for doubt
No "why should" and no "but"
Stop asking: "Am I loved?"
Love even if you're not!

04:00 --- Reci... (22) --- Ma daj... --- Sjeti se...

26.06.2006.

Stereotipi...

...koje nećemo priznati, ali su tu... u našoj generaciji...
O čemu ja to? Pa ako malo obiđete blogove u mojim linkovima znat ćete o čemu ja...
Mislim, ne znam jel to uzrokovano općim nezadovoljstvom društva, našom dobi, ili...
Ali znam da smo svi neki depresivni, pod maskama ove ili one vrste i neprihvaćeni...
A jesmo li? Jel to stvarno tako? Ili je sve stvar našeg prikrivenog pesimizma?
Pesimizam zna bit dobra stvar, kažu da se pesimist češće lijepo iznenadi...
Krivo kažu... iz mog iskustva pesimizam vodi dolje, ne gore...
Očekuješ gore i obično se dogodi gore... nekad JOŠ gore...
Nešto što bi stajalo jednom mom kolegi:

In the neverending
Circle of negation
All see me as a freak
A pure abomination


Hm... da... pesimizam na vrhuncu... i jel to dobro? Nije...
Vodi gorem, kao što sam rekao...

E sad jedna druga strana metal, goth, weltschmertz, pitajboga društva: osjećajnost!
Je li i to maska? Mislim da nije... mislim da je to baš njen izostanak tj. gola istina...
Čuli ste za emocionalnu inteligenciju... e to...
Mi smo ti "intelignetni"

Reklo bi se ovako:

This honest soul
Has nothing to hide
Try proving I lied and
I'll answer with pride

But deep in my heart
I'm keeping something
A jewel I wouldn't
Give up for nothing


Mislim da se ovo može univerzalno primjenit... na većinu "nas"...
Ima li u tome što loše? To ostavljam vama na procjenu... meni nije... nekad...
S druge strane, nekad me to goni i volio bih biti od kamena ili pod debelom maskom...
Nikakve koristi od toga, jer si odmah i manji kreativni genij, a i manje uživaš u životu...
Eto, dosta filozofije za danas, sad će 4 i mislim danas leći sat ranije...
I nek se zna, ovi pjesnički primjeri su zapravo moje djelo...
Jedine strofe nedovršenih pjesama...
namcor

03:44 --- Reci... (15) --- Ma daj... --- Sjeti se...

20.06.2006.



First let me say this won't make sense, ok? Now that we've made that clear, let's just start... a start would be the world around me, as always... Now, the people are what makes that world that interesting... I always liked the good company... but most of time that company wouldn't appreciate me... not as much as I'd like, that is. Now where's the catch? Beats me... this is supposed to be a piece of mind, kinda confession... interpret it your way (like there's any other...)

Is it just me or am I alone again? Again, beats me... never the bright one, not when decisions about my condition are made... no sir, I'm wrong most of the time... What I do know is that the whole thing might even be my own fault. Why? Am I a bad person? Call me an egoist, but I must say: NO... or at least I try with all my heart for that answer to be a NO. All my real sins are made of feelings. All things i did wrong made of misunderstandings, forgetfulness or disbeliefs, none on purpose. I did things for a cause, a good cause that slowly changes for the better... it grows with my character, time brings new ideals to it. That cause keeps me going... It holds my world in one piece, no matter how that world looks like. I try and want to do things that'll keep that cause alive and show its real face to others. I hope that they'll understand, I really do... but sometimes hope does nothing, it just brings back the dissapointment...

Where am I going? You're asking the wrong side... I'm just writing this and the end is none of my damn bussines... it'll come when the hands start to feel tired, cause the brain ain't stoppin' really... no, not yet...

Yes, I'm beginning to wonder: Is all the jabber about "all humans are evil and you can't change that" just silly superstition or what? I mean... I can't say people around me are evil but... wait... now I get it... I'm just being a perfectionist again... gee... this hurts... It's me again... something in my head... isn't that always so? I mean... everything is just a matter of "point of view", right? Which means this goddamn post is just another dream of mine... a dream of perfect society... now a song title crosses my mind: Kamelot - Soul Society... that's what I'm looking for, obviously.. a SOUL society... not a money society, not a goddamn "Me, Myself and I" society... a SOUL society! A dream never to come true... i know... hope dies last but to hope for this to be possible... no, wouldn't make much sense, now would it? I mean, you can't change a society to suit your own selfish needs, that would be... not a paradox, but a catastrophy times 6 billion... or is it 7 already? Who could count... because everyone sees the society his/her own way... I'm just another dreamer, one of many... and won't make a thing to get above the mass... I'll stay just One of many... self-imposed...

Kamelot - Soul Society

If my soul could revive
From my carnal remains
What does it matter to me
If it all fades to black
If I'm born once again
Then no one really is free

How could I be condemned
For the things I have done
If my intentions were good
I guess I'll never know
Some things under the sun
Can never be understood

How can we believe in heaven
Human reason counters all
My tears are soul society
My life is just a fragment
Of the universe and more
There must be more than I can see

In the dark we're the same
In the concept of time
We're like a grain in the sand
And we sprout from the flame
As if death was a rain
'Cause we can not understand

How I wish there was a heaven
All for one and one for all
A flawless soul society

Our lives are just a fragment
Of the universe and more
There may be more than we can see...

01:01 --- Reci... (25) --- Ma daj... --- Sjeti se...

19.06.2006.

Evo inspiracije... :P

Večeras sam inspiriran... Zašto? Pojma nemam...
A o čemu pisat? Pojma nemam...
Ajmo redom: Pjesme nema... i neće bit... zašto?
Nema inspiracije... za pjesmu... al ima za post...
O čemu post? Čekaj... čekaj... aha...
O PRAZNICIMA! Zašto? Ne znam, došlo mi...
Meni nešto žao što je škola završila... nekako sam baš počeo učit...
Jesam normalan? Nikad, hvala na pitanju...
Gle, neću vidit sve te ljude dugo... neke manje dugo neke više dugo ali...
Dugo! Falit će mi neki... neki manje... ali će mi falit!
Već mi neki fale... ko da sam ih po putu pogubio (ne krivo shvatit:)
A i falit će mi svo to živciranje... taman se čovjek navikne...
Još jedna stvar: praznici su... dakle... ode još jedna GODINA...
Zašto je to bitno? Pa ostanu još DVIJE... a to je malo... premalo...
Ja bi još barem četiri... barem... a možda je i to malo...
Jesam normalan? Jesam rekao da me to ne pitate? Jesam...
Ajmo dalje... nema dalje...
Novi post uskoro...




Luzeri... ne mogu gola dat... luzeri... fuj... hrvatska

00:23 --- Reci... (5) --- Ma daj... --- Sjeti se...

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Me, Myself and I...


Rođen:
26.IV.'89.

Slušam:
ovaj metal
onaj metal
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Boja:
CRNA
a ni malo plave ne škodi...

Škola:
učim za fax

Zakleti ateist
u klasičnom smislu

Obožavam:
dobru glazbu
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(malo ih je pravih)
engleski
Internet
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broj 13

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