Spleen Siska

srijeda, 26.09.2007.

zaboravnost ga nije izbrisala
taj predivni lucidni san
plimni val, boje, snage u njemu,
kad me osamario,
s mazohistickim uzitkom prihvatio sam strah
i smjeskom jedinstva sa svime i nicime,
nakon toga iskustva,
svijet je drukciji,
zabacujem glavu
promatram dim cigarete
kako se uvija i plese u mraku,
oblici, galantnost, savrsenost,
dok se u ocima radja nesto
poput muzike
koja gori
u gustom zraku



Hedwig And The Angry Inch - Wig In A Box

On nights like this
When the world's a bit amiss
And the lights go down
Across the trailer park
I get down, I feel had
I feel on the verge of going mad
And then it's time to punch the clock

I put on some make-up
And turn on the tape deck
And pull the wig back on my head
Suddenly I'm Miss Midwest Midnight Checkout Queen
Until I head home
And I put myself to bed

I look back on where I'm from
Look at the woman I've become
And the strangest things seem suddenly routine
I look up from my Vermouth on the rocks
The gift wrapped wig still in the box
Of towering velveteen

I put on some make-up
Some LaVern Baker
I'm pulling the wig down from the shelf
Suddenly I'm Miss Beehive 1963
Until I wake up
And I turn back to myself

Some girls they have natural ease
They wear it any way they please
With their French flip curls
And perfumed magazines
Wear it up, let it down
This is the best way that I've found
To be the best you've ever seen

I put on some make-up
Turn on the eight-tack
I'm pulling the wig down from the shelf
Suddenly I'm Miss Farrah Fawcett
From TV
Until I wake up
And I turn back to myself

Shag, bi-level, bob
Dorothy Hamill do,
Sausage curl, chicken wings
It's all because of you
With your blow dried, feather backed
Toni home wave, too
Flip, for, frizz, flop
It's all because of you
It's all because of you
It's all because of you

(okay...everybody...)

I put on some make-up
Turn up the eight track
I'm pulling the wig down from the shelf
Suddenly I'm this punk rock star
Of stage and screen
And I ain't never
I'm never turning back

26.09.2007. u 21:20 • 12 KomentaraPrint#

ponedjeljak, 24.09.2007.

nasmijani val


sto nam se dogodilo
kako smo zapeli
na ovoj plazi kamenoj
punoj pukotinama i rupa
pod noćnim veom
praznog neba
mirnog mora
šuma blijedog
iza pogleda
puno dublje
prema nasmijanom valu
kristalno plavom
optocen kraljevskom hladnocom
nakon izlaska siromasnog sunca


24.09.2007. u 20:49 • 5 KomentaraPrint#

četvrtak, 20.09.2007.

sjene postojanja


umire zbog
nevine pogreške
s pogledom
prema zavijajućem suncu
sada dalekim
sada utišanim
tako spokojnim...
nježna kosa
na obrazima istrošenim
na obrazima mrtvima
hladnog ugođaja jutara
ispunjenih gustom maglom
raspršenoj po oslikanim
neukroćenim poljima
rosnog zelenila
rasutog po zemlji staroj
radi rođenja djeteta bezimenog...
radi rođenja djeteta neželjenog...

20.09.2007. u 21:54 • 8 KomentaraPrint#

ponedjeljak, 17.09.2007.

vodi me osmehom bola, daleko do zvezda

Vangog - Delfin

možda te sutra imati neću
ali danas te imam
za ceo život svoj,
vise se nikad
nećemo stići,
nismo jedno
u kući ljubavi,
molim, za toplinu,
sećanja vode za dubokog dna
od stida,
ti čuvaj je,
pod kozom znaš da nema nikoga,
osim mene
aha,
i milion tona teškog sunca,
osim tebe i mene,
ova zemlja nema nikoga,
aha...
bojiš se da udahneš vetar,
svaki uzlet je pad,
kad plasis se
kako se nikad
nećemo stići,
nismo jedno u ljubavi,
čuvaj toplinu,
sećanja vode za dubokog dna,
od stida,
ti čuvaj je,
pod kozom znaš da nema nikoga,
osim mene
aha,
i milion tona teškog sunca,
osim tebe i mene,
ova zemlja nema nikoga,
aha...

volim tu pjesmu, napisao sam ju po onom sto sam čuo, nisam siguran da su to točni lyricsi al, jebi ga, u mom svijetu su korektni... to mi je važno... valjda...sjećanja koja blijede, prolazni trenutci, prolazni osjećaji, sad već zaboravljeni... svi su nestali...

17.09.2007. u 23:27 • 1 KomentaraPrint#

srijeda, 12.09.2007.

Billy Collins-The Best Cigarette



There are many that I miss having sent my last one out a car window sparking along the road one night, years ago. The heralded one, of course: after sex, the two glowing tips now the lights of a single ship; at the end of a long dinner with more wine to come and a smoke ring coasting into the chandelier; or on a white beach, holding one with fingers still wet from a swim. How bittersweet these punctuations of flame and gesture; but the best were on those mornings when I would have a little something going in the typewriter, the sun bright in the windows, maybe some Berlioz on in the background. I would go into the kitchen for coffee and on the way back to the page, curled in its roller, I would light one up and feel its dry rush mix with the dark taste of coffee. Then I would be my own locomotive, trailing behind me as I returned to work little puffs of smoke, indicators of progress, signs of industry and thought, the signal that told the nineteenth century it was moving forward. That was the best cigarette, when I would steam into the study full of vaporous hope and stand there, the big headlamp of my face pointed down at all the words in parallel lines.

12.09.2007. u 22:18 • 5 KomentaraPrint#

utorak, 11.09.2007.



putovanje
kroz vodu mrzlu
starom, iskusnom arkom
pod suptilnim titrajucim mjesecom
ugodno osvetljavajuci nadolazace mocnike
valove duboke, prislonjene uz brod, plesu polagano
kadar udaljavajuci se od njih uz slatke pritvuke toplog klavira
kadar filma,
bez kraja...

Luciano Pavarotti - Nessun Dorma(G. Puccini)

morao sam
R.I.P

11.09.2007. u 21:00 • 1 KomentaraPrint#

So why did I do it? I could offer a million answers, all false. The truth is that I'm a bad person, but that's going to change, I'm going to change. This is the last of this sort of thing. I'm cleaning up and I'm moving on, going straight and choosing life. I'm looking forward to it already. I'm going to be just like you: the job, the family, the fucking big television, the washing machine, the car, the compact disc and electrical tin opener, good health, low cholesterol, dental insurance, mor tgage, starter home, leisurewear, luggage, three-piece suite, DIY, game shows, junk food, children, walks in the park, nine to five, good at golf, washing the car, choice of sweaters, family Christmas, indexed pension, tax exemption, clearing the gutters, getting by, looking ahead, to the day you die.

lucidni me san potaknuo
prestajem piti, cini se da to izvlaci ono naj gore iz mene, bar jedan tjedan, jedan mjesec, jednu godinu, jedan zivot...

let's pretend...

11.09.2007. u 04:25 • 3 KomentaraPrint#

ponedjeljak, 10.09.2007.

od gnossienna do poirea, koliko bili prekrasni, nista mi nepuza uzitak kao mastanje o zaboravljenom uzitku "zla" koje sam posipao po pucanstvu ovom sisackom, mozda se vratim na staru destruktivnost, stari kaos, neznam zasto sam dosao na ovo na cemu sam sad, mozda zato sto sam htijo iskusit nesto novo, ili mozda zbog precjenjenih predrasuda ovog puritanskog grada, sve u svemu, nisam siguran zasto... mozda zato sto sam se smirio zbog zelenih polja tog prekrasnog zelenja, koje je pod ovom zalosnom olovnom vlasti koja radje podrzava nasilne kemikalije poput alkohola i speeda, dok prezire i mrzi stvari koje nas opustaju i cine nas manje "zlima", losima;uzmite tu rijec kako zelite; prema ustrojstvu naseg drustva, naravno... ne znam vjerovatno nista, o glupostima tim, no sto znam je da se vracam na staro i sto zelim reci je samo pazite se ljudi jer jedan bjesni mizantrop je zapeo polumrtav na vasem putu ali dovoljno zilav da vas povuce zajedno sa sa sobom u svoju nezasitnu crnu rupu nicega....
.
.
.kraj...

10.09.2007. u 21:50 • 1 KomentaraPrint#

nedjelja, 09.09.2007.

rain down, rain down, from a great height...

boli, naravno da boli, odbila me danas, veceras, ocekivano, ali ne ta bol, mozda sramotu osjecam, neznam nemam pojam te rijeci definiran u mojem jadnom mozgu, nisam mogao vise ostat na svjezem alkoholnom zraku, morao sam otic, ovdje gdje me nitko nezna, gdje sam sam, jer nitko osim mene nezeli pricat samnom, ali nema veze, kazu mi tako, odjeban si, naravno da jesi. i dok pisem ovo alkoholom inspiriran, opusteniji nego inace, sjecam se blago nekih sranja, ali sam naravno poput svake pijane subote otisao u bjedno mnostvo s previse tog otrovnog samopouzdanja, mozda je u tome bio problem, neznam, mozda je u njoj mozda je u meni nije vazno, sto je vazno da idem sad gledat crtice s prijateljem pravim pit jos tekucine i moza i radit cufte ako budemo pijani dovoljno, uglavnom to je to, kad bi jednostavno stali na tome, ali vise neznam gdje sam poceo, htjedoj samo rec da o nekim stavarima sam razmisljo vise nego ostalim, ti si mi okupirala um, vec duze vrijeme, prosle subote sam rekao prijateljici tvojoj, sad bi tebi rekao, ali nema veze jer kako si rekla bit cemo prijatelji... lol, gdje sam to jos cuo, nasmija va me, pokusavam bit sto iskerniji u tom zalosnom sranju, ali neznam vise dodje mi nekad jednostavno da vam pocnem utrob, uglavnom idem nastavit ispijat svoju dusu iz plitke case... (mznja iz ovog posta nije usredotocena na jednu osobu, proizasla je iz cistih mizantropskih fiksacija) uglavnom na kraju sta mi ostaje, osim prjezira i mrznje, kao i nastavku prezivljavanja uz car mojih predivnih opijata koji me nisu iznevjerili poput vas... imam jos gomilu gadenja ali to cu ostavit za drugi pijani kukavicluk, idem radit cufte sa simetom....

pola tri, ponovo se vratili iz grada, nista od cufti, nemozemo nac frizider, sime se potuko s bratom skoro,, jos alkohola je doslo nasem zalosnim puteljkom, i may be paranoid but I'm not an android... rain down, rain down, from a great height...



serves you right you git!

09.09.2007. u 00:28 • 5 KomentaraPrint#

subota, 08.09.2007.



kako, pitam se
taj zamagljeni um
ne osjeti odbojnost
svoje duše,
proždrljivost
svojih podlih očiju?
zar ne vidi proziran smješak
dvoličnog odobravanja na licima
derišta?
zar ne čuje prizvuke mržnje
uperene zadrto u njega?
pitam se cesto
kako nastavlja
pričati
taj otužni um
slijep i gluh?

08.09.2007. u 18:02 • 1 KomentaraPrint#

četvrtak, 06.09.2007.

ČUVAR

Odvuci suze svoje iz tamnice bjedne suze nakupljene...
Daleko od svog bjesa besmislenog, svoje tragedije prozirne...
Sa suzama pobjegni, u sumu cuvarevu,sumu zore, davno zabranjene...
Trazeci ga za utociste, za milost,
Dusu natrag svoju otkupljujes,
Pod grbom njegovim, grbom lazi osjecajnih,
Sve noci proplakane zaboravljas, suze potrosene isparavaju,
S zelenilom u ocima, cuvara zavodljivo pogledavas,
Dok tamno pivo pijucka, dok svoje poljupce natrag u sebe tjera,
S dugom bradom koja visi, sjedi umirujuce, dok potisnuti pupovi kuhaju,
Pod suncem izgarajucim, suncem koje hladi,
Cuvar ce te sakriti,
cuvar ce te voljeti,
cuvar ce bez tebe samo,
umrijeti,
Svjetla ce se ugasiti...

--------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Reci mi
Dodji sa mnom
Popij tu zaboravnu patnju
Drzi me cvrsto
Moje srce
Ti
Oluja prolazi mojim umom,
Sjecanja peku
Vristim,
Hranim se blagoslovom praznine
Drzi me cvrsto,
Poput pjeska propadam kroz tvoje prste
Poput zrake zadnje sunca umiruceg
Prolazim kroz tvoju kozu umirujucu
Zatvaram oci
Tu si
Kad otvaram oci sjecanja me rezu
Krv mi isparava
Ostaje vreca pljesnjivih kostiju
Oci mrtve
Koje gore pod tvojom pljuvackom sluzavom
Djete zmaja umire sa svojom ljubavi.
osvecen
Umirjeti zajedno, ljepe li pomisli,
Umrijeti i nedati nitkome da to upropasti,
Krv okaljana
Uspavani motivi
Krv zaprljana
Lazima od kojih sam nastao...
Plutam, lebdim, no zarobljeen sam,
U mjehuru svoga idiotizma i svoje nedovoljnosti,
Zaboravi nadu,
bit ces izdan
Luda zna, bozija luda zna,
Povrsnost ljutskog roda
Luda zna sve i nista,
Jer on je luda, kao i ti, kao i mi...
Prijezir umire vremenom,
Prijezir se radja vremenom,
Ogorcenost zajedno s njim,
Duse umiru vremenom,
Duse bivaju zaboravljene vremenom,
Duse umiru vremenom,
Jednostavnost svega, sve je jednostavno,
Nedovoljno, zaboravljeno,
Sve sto je nije, sve sto nije, takodjer nije,
No ipak krvarimo, zasto?
Zasto ne?

---------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Slike brata Jottuna na na myspace-u(?)

muzika brata Jottuna na myspace-u(?)

--------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

06.09.2007. u 03:45 • 7 KomentaraPrint#

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Komentari da/ne?

sam, u tisini...



2,21,16

ako sam ostavio komentar na vasem blogu nemorate ostavljati uzvrat, jer mi to stvarno nije vazno.


Slike brata Jottuna na na myspace-u(?)

muzika brata Jottuna na myspace-u(?)

‘Insanity in individuals is something rare; but in groups, parties, nations, and epochs it is the rule.’ — Nietzsche



El pueblo se alza como un vendaval
camina sin miedo contra el capital
Comunismo Libertario, Revolución Social.


Be Drunk

You have to be always drunk. That's all there is to it--it's the
only way. So as not to feel the horrible burden of time that breaks
your back and bends you to the earth, you have to be continually
drunk.
But on what?Wine, poetry or virtue, as you wish. But be
drunk.
And if sometimes, on the steps of a palace or the green grass of
a ditch, in the mournful solitude of your room, you wake again,
drunkenness already diminishing or gone, ask the wind, the wave,
the star, the bird, the clock, everything that is flying, everything
that is groaning, everything that is rolling, everything that is
singing, everything that is speaking. . .ask what time it is and
wind, wave, star, bird, clock will answer you:"It is time to be
drunk! So as not to be the martyred slaves of time, be drunk, be
continually drunk! On wine, on poetry or on virtue as you wish."

Charles Baudelaire

cg

"And if I show you my dark side
Will you still hold me tonight?
And if I open my heart to you
And show you my weak side
What would you do?
Would you sell your story to Rolling Stone?
Would you take the children away
And leave me alone?
And smile in reassurance
As you whisper down the phone?
Would you send me packing?
Or would you take me home? "
pink floyd

peace day



If you like "detaču"



ovaj blog nepostoji...

Piotr Ilytch Tchaikovsky was he the tortured soul
who poured out his immortal longings in to dignified
passages of stately music
or was he just an old poof who wrote tunes?

>>>>Monty Python

"Four legs good, Two legs bad."
George Orwell


"Religion began when the first scoundrel meet the first fool..."

Voltaire

"I will not eat oysters. I want my food dead. Not sick -- not wounded -- dead."
Woody Allen

"One pill makes you larger
And one pill makes you small
And the ones that mother gives you
Don't do anything at all"

--- White Rabbit



mrzite me u tisini diabolis@net.hr

Alone

[Poem by Edgar Allan Poe]

From childhood's hour I have not been
As others were - I have not seen
As others saw - I could not bring
My passions from a common spring
From the same source I have not taken
My sorrow; I could not awaken
My heart to joy at the same tone;
And all I lov'd, I lov'd alone
Then - in my childhood - in the dawn
Of a most stormy life - was drawn
From ev'ry depth of good and ill
The mystery which binds me still:
From the torrent, or the fountain,
From the red cliff of the mountain
From the sun that 'round me roll'd
In it's autumn tint of gold -
From the lighting in the sky
As it pass'd me flying by -
From the thunder and the storm,
And the cloud that look the form
(When the rest of Heaven was blue)
Of a demon in my view.




Blog.hr





Anathema - J'ai Fait Une Promesse


La voie, le saule s'incline dessus du ruisseau,
Comme une personne qui se descend criant pour l'amant.
La voie le saule s'incline dessus du ruisseau,
Comme une personne qui se descend criant pour l'amant.
Me rapelle d'automne précedente, en révérence,
Je m'ai engagé, je m'ai engagé, je m'ai engagé ŕ vous
Je m'ai engagé, je m'ai engagé, I plegded myself to you.










Theme song from M*A*S*H

Suicide is Painless

Through early morning fog I see
visions of the things to be
the pains that are withheld for me
I realize and I can see...

that suicide is painless
It brings on many changes
and I can take or leave it if I please.
I try to find a way to make
all our little joys relate
without that ever-present hate
but now I know that it's too late, and...

The game of life is hard to play
I'm gonna lose it anyway
The losing card I'll someday lay
so this is all I have to say.

suicide is painless
It brings on many changes
and I can take or leave it if I please.
I try to find a way to make
all our little joys relate
without that ever-present hate
but now I know that it's too late, and...

The only way to win is cheat
And lay it down before I'm beat
and to another give my seat
for that's the only painless feat.

suicide is painless
It brings on many changes
and I can take or leave it if I please.
I try to find a way to make
all our little joys relate
without that ever-present hate
but now I know that it's too late, and...

The sword of time will pierce our skins
It doesn't hurt when it begins
But as it works its way on in
The pain grows stronger...watch it grin, but...

suicide is painless
It brings on many changes
and I can take or leave it if I please.
I try to find a way to make
all our little joys relate
without that ever-present hate
but now I know that it's too late, and...

A brave man once requested me
to answer questions that are key
is it to be or not to be
and I replied 'oh why ask me?'

'Cause suicide is painless
it brings on many changes
and I can take or leave it if I please.
...and you can do the same thing if you please.



You won't get HIV by:

o Having ordinary social or casual contact with someone living with HIV or AIDS
o Sharing clothing with someone who has HIV or AIDS
o Touching a person who has HIV or AIDS
o Sharing food, dishes, or eating utensils with someone living with HIV or AIDS
o Dry-kissing someone with HIV or AIDS
o Hugging someone who has HIV or AIDS
o Shaking hands with someone living with HIV or AIDS
o Sitting on toilet seats
o Being bitten by an insect
o Massaging a person living with HIV or AIDS
o Using a hand to sexually stimulate a partner who has HIV or AIDS (although a risk may exist if blood, semen, or vaginal fluids come in contact with broken skin)
o Masturbating
o Touching the tears, saliva, or sweat of a person living with HIV or AIDS
o Living or working with an HIV-infected person







Listen up, maggots. You are not special. You are not a beautiful or a unique snowflake. You're the same decaying shit as everything else on this pathetic little planet.

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