la vida termina

Sometimes I want to be more than I am
and it pains me that I am not
sometimes I want to be less
and it pains me that I make other feel like they need to be more
it is in this labyrinth of this ridiculous existence
when I can't see where my steps stop being mine
when my laugh is hunger and my passion is hunger
and my ankles are hunger and my eyes are hunger
and everything is actually just emptiness
that I find some dark where I can search for the tears
and wait, it is actually more waiting than crying
for the darkness to be enough, for the emptiness to be enough
for the belly waiting for a baby to be enough
for the grey hairs and missed love stories to be enough
to be absolved from my self and the wanting
not in any Buddhist bullshit way, just as an escape
it is all an escape...