I tried to kill the pain... But only brought more...

četvrtak, 03.08.2006.

Pokusala sam... nisam uspjela..... zapravo... pokusala sam pokusati..... nisam uspjela reci sestri.... nemam dovoljno snage.... jednostavno nisam mogla..... nemogu objasniti...... sjedim ovdje.... misli su mi zatocene... nista ne izlazi van.... nema rijeci.... neznam... nemogu objasniti.... mozda bi joj cak pomoglo da joj pokaazem ovo sto sam napisala.... ali nemogu... jednostavno joj nemogu pokazati.... neznam sto bi mislila... neznam sto bi napravila....... pokazala sam jednoj prijateljici taj post.... neznam zasto.... stvarno neznam.... njen prvi komentar bio je 'ovo nisi ti'.... da... nisam.... kad nitko nezna mene... kako bi znao... ovo je moja druga strana.... prava.... neznam zapravo.... ovo su moje misli.. moji osjecaji... koje nemogu podjeliti s drugima... mislim.... sa prijateljima.... ovako je lakse..... znaju neki moji frendovi da imam jos jedan blog, osim onog za koji oni znaju.... ali neznaju adresu... prosli put sam napravila tu gresku i dala adresu... nakon tjedan dana cijela je skola znala za moj blog... i nasla sam se odjednom pisuci lazi... nesposobna napisati sto zapravo osjecam.... i pukla sam.... da... ma neznam.... sada da me netko pita da kazem sto sam napisala orije minutu nebi znala reci.... samo tipkam.... gledam tipkovnicu... i tipkam.... nije ni cudo sto neznam sto pisem.... vrijeme je ono... kasno....

Osjecam se zatoceno.... u svojoj nesigurnosti... slabosti.... lutam... trazeci nesto... neznam sto... ali... moja uvijek u potrazi.... za cim....... za srecom... za tjednom bez ijedne suze.... za danom bez brige... potraga bez kraja... meni nece doci takvo vrijeme.... i tako ultam... vjecito lutam... u potrazi.... i gubim razum... gubim nadu.... znam da necu to naci... trazim svog andela.... uvijek je tu... ali nekada se sakrije.. nemogu ju naci.... i kada slijepo hodam u tami samo me primi za ruku... i povuce na svijetlost.... moj andeo... koji me oslobada.....

My angel... my guardian angel...
This prayer is for you...
Hoping it will reach you...
I pray...

- 04:21 - Komentari (13) - Isprintaj - #

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Links...

Ja...

O sebi necu dati puno podataka... samo nesto malo... nevazno...
ja... sto reci o sebi...
imam 15 godina... cura sam... jako sam depresivno... neshvaceno... tuzno... radoznalo... a ponekad... u nekim trenutcima sretno bice... slusam rock, punk, metal, screamo, emo... slusam to zbog muzike... svih tih zvukova... a ponajvise zbog tih rijeci... tih rijeci koje me uspavljuju... zbog kojih odletim u svoj svijet... u svijet gdje ima razumjevanja... sto jos reci... nesmijem puno, jer nitko ne smije znati tko sam... imam jos jedan blog... na kojemu se cinim kao sretna, zadovoljna zivotom... ispunjena... no to je samo krinka... za sve moje suze... patnju... prazninu... mrzim narodnjake, no ne mrzim ljude koji slusaju narodnjake... neka svako bude sto je... samo da ne podcijenjuje druge... i da ih ne osuduje po razlikama... mrzim kad to netko radi... o meni cete moci saznati vise kroz moje postove... to je sve sto trebate znati o meni... o emptiness...

lyrics...

12 STONES
Photograph

Fear falls hard like rain again,
Washing over me
You say nothing will ever change
What do I believe?
You fall deep inside again,
Nothing left to see
Weakness fills your heart again
You put it to rest

Forfeit everything,
'Cause you were never strong enough
Close my eyes again
And pray that life will not give up

I try to see your face again,
A photograph for me
Your voice calling out again,
Nothing left for me
You try to find your place again,
Waiting just to breathe
Weakness takes your heart again
You put it to rest

Locked inside again
Locked inside again
Locked inside again

Forfeit everything,
'Cause you were never strong enough
Close my eyes again
And pray that life will not give up

Forfeit everything,
'Cause you were never strong enough
Close my eyes again
And pray that life will not give up

Did you forget about the things I said?
Fight the lies inside your head
Deny those who try to bring you down
Kill the pain and emptiness
Find a love and lose yourself
Without this life, you're just a memory

Locked inside again
Locked inside again
Locked inside again

Forfeit everything,
'Cause you were never strong enough
Close my eyes again
And pray that life will not give up

Forfeit everything,
'Cause you were never strong enough
Close my eyes again
And pray that life will not give up

Jimmy Eat World
Hear You Me

There's no one in town I know
You gave us some place to go
I never said thank you for that
'thought I might get one more chance

What would you think of me now?
So lucky, so strong, so proud
I never said thank you for that
Now I'll never have a chance

May angels lead you in
Hear you me my friends
On sleepless roads, the sleepless go
May angels lead you in

So what would you think of me now?
So lucky, so strong, so proud
I never said thank you for that
Now I'll never have a chance

May angels lead you in
Hear you me my friends
On sleepless roads the sleepless go
May angels lead you in

And if you were with me tonight
I'd sing to you just one more time
A song for a heart so big
God couldn't let it live

May angels lead you in
Hear you me my friends
Upon sleepless roads the sleepless go
May angels lead you in

May angels lead you in
Hear you me my friends
On sleepless roads the sleepless
May angels lead you in