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Political joke about cows
A CHRISTIAN DEMOCRAT: You have two cows. You keep one and give one to your neighbor.
A SOCIALIST: You have two cows. The government takes one and gives it to your neighbor.
AN AMERICAN REPUBLICAN: You have two cows. Your neighbor has none. So what?
AN AMERICAN DEMOCRAT: You have two cows. Your neighbor has none. You feel guilty for being successful. You vote people into office who tax your cows, forcing you to sell one to raise money to pay the tax. The people you voted for then take the tax money and buy a cow and give it to your neighbor. You feel righteous.
A COMMUNIST: You have two cows. The government seizes both and provides you with milk.
A FASCIST: You have two cows. The government seizes both and sells you the milk. You join the underground and start a campaign of sabotage.
DEMOCRACY, AMERICAN STYLE: You have two cows. The government taxes you to the point you have to sell both to support a man in a foreign country who has only one cow, which was a gift from your government.
CAPITALISM, AMERICAN STYLE: You have two cows. You sell one, buy a bull, and build a herd of cows.
BUREAUCRACY, AMERICAN STYLE: You have two cows. The government takes them both, shoots one, milks the other, pays you for the milk, then pours the milk down the drain.
AN AMERICAN CORPORATION: You have two cows. You sell one, and force the other to produce the milk of four cows. You are surprised when the cow drops dead.
A FRENCH CORPORATION: You have two cows. You go on strike because you want three cows.
A JAPANESE CORPORATION: You have two cows. You redesign them so they are one-tenth the size of an ordinary cow and produce twenty times the milk. You then create clever cow cartoon images called Cowkimon and market them World-Wide.
A GERMAN CORPORATION: You have two cows. You reengineer them so they live for 100 years, eat once a month, and milk themselves.
A BRITISH CORPORATION: You have two cows. They are mad. They die. Pass the shepherd's pie, please.
AN ITALIAN CORPORATION: You have two cows, but you don't know where they are. You break for lunch.
A RUSSIAN CORPORATION: You have two cows. You count them and learn you have five cows. You count them again and learn you have 42 cows. You count them again and learn you have 12 cows. You stop counting cows and open another bottle of vodka.
A SWISS CORPORATION: You have 5000 cows, none of which belong to you. You charge others for storing them.
A BRAZILIAN CORPORATION: You have two cows. You enter into a partnership with an American corporation. Soon you have 1000 cows and the American corporation declares bankruptcy.
AN INDIAN CORPORATION: You have two cows. You worship both of them.
A CHINESE CORPORATION: You have two cows. You have 300 people milking them. You claim full employment, high bovine productivity, and arrest the newsman who reported on them.
AN ISRAELI CORPORATION: There are these two Jewish cows, right? They open a milk factory, an ice cream store, and then sell the movie rights. They send their calves to Harvard to become doctors. So, who needs people?
AN ARKANSAS CORPORATION: You have two cows. That one on the left is kinda cute.
Frisco RR Bridge
Vintage Railroad bridge in St. Louis, Missouri with Friscoe Railroad slogan.
The St. Louis and San Francisco Railway was incorporated in Missouri on September 7, 1876. It was formed from the Missouri Division and Central Division of the Atlantic and Pacific Railroad. After bankruptcy, the Frisco emerged as the St. Louis and San Francisco Railroad, which was incorporated on 29 June 1896. This company, too, went bankrupt; on 24 August 1916, the company was reorganized as the St. Louis–San Francisco Railway.
The St. Louis–San Francisco Railway had two main lines: St. Louis – Tulsa – Oklahoma City and Kansas City – Memphis – Birmingham. The junction of the two lines was in Springfield, Missouri, which also played home to the company's main shops facility. Other lines included Springfield – Kansas City (via Clinton, MO); Monett, MO (Pierce City) – Wichita, KS; Monett, MO – Paris, TX; St. Louis – River Jct., AR (Memphis, TN); Tulsa, OK – Dallas, TX; Tulsa, OK to Avard, OK; and Lakeside, OK – Hugo, OK – Hope, AR.
From March 1917 through January 1959 the Frisco, in a joint venture with the Missouri-Kansas-Texas Railroad (aka MKT or the Katy), operated the Texas Special. This luxury passenger liner ran from St. Louis to Dallas, Ft. Worth, and San Antonio. The Texas Special is a popular prototype in model railroading.
The Frisco was acquired by the Burlington Northern Railroad on November 21, 1980.
Former Frisco lines today
The core of the former Frisco system continues to be operated by BNSF as high-density mainlines. Other secondary and branchlines have been sold to shortline operators or have been abandoned altogether.
Kansas City-Springfield-Memphis-Birmingham: Operated by BNSF
St. Louis-Springfield-Tulsa-Dallas: Operated by BNSF
Fort Scott, KS to Afton, OK: Operated by BNSF
St. Louis to Memphis, TN: Operated by BNSF
Tulsa, OK to Avard, OK: Operated by BNSF
Monett, MO to Fort Smith, AR: Operated by Arkansas and Missouri Railroad
Lakeside, OK to Hope, AR: Operated by Kiamichi RR (Rail America)
Tulsa, OK (Sapulpa) to Oklahoma City, OK: Operated by Stillwater Central RR
Oklahoma City to Snyder, OK: Operated by Stillwater Central RR
Snyder, OK (Long Siding) to Quanah, TX: Operated by BNSF
Enid, OK to Frederick, TX: Operated by Grainbelt/Farmrail
Amory, MS to Pensacola, FL: Operated by Alabama and Gulf Coast RR (RailAmerica)
Springfield to Kansas City (via Clinton): Abandoned
Monett (Pierce City) to Carthage, MO: Out of service
Carthage, MO to Wichita, KS: Mostly Abandoned
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